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EvilHomer

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Comments
Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare trailer
05/06/14, 08:47

Bad Company is so much better than Call of Duty it's not even funny.

And it's not going to be Americans raging hard against Kevin Spacey. It's going to be Americans raging hard FOR Kevin Spacey, only then Kevin Spacey shoots your character in the face and you've got to play out the last couple missions as your dog.
Running Wild - Conquistadores
05/05/14, 17:39

Actually, Evil Homer is basically just a goofy retard with maracas; he is neither literary nor particularly malicious:

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=72994

So I could indeed be the true Evil Homer.
Running Wild - Conquistadores
05/05/14, 17:35

"Actually no we just thought of them as metal because it was the 80s."

Well there you go. QED.
Running Wild - Conquistadores
05/05/14, 16:58

The Cramps aren't psychobilly, any more than Running Wild is pirate metal. They may have first coined the term, but they are not pirate metal, and if THEY think they are pirate metal, then they are wrong.

I see your UrbanDictionary, and raise you Wikipedia:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Running_Wild_%28band%29

Note the listings under the infobox heading, Genre. Heavy metal, speed metal, power metal. NO PIRATE METAL. Wikipedia is a more reliable and reputable source than Urbandictionary, and Wikipedia does not consider Running Wild to be pirate metal.

Furthermore, Running Wild apparently did not write any songs about pirates until 1988, over a decade after the band formed. Their "pirate phase" lasted a mere four years, and it was not even an exclusively-pirate phase; rather, they sang about "historically-based" subjects, including the War of the Roses and Waterloo (neither of which involved pirates).
Alestorm - You Are a Pirate
05/05/14, 16:31

They're OK, but they're aggressively mid-tier; unless you're a big fan of power metal and/or are a pirate, you're unlikely to find anything enduring with Alestorm.

I don't know who's been telling you to listen to this song, but it works better as a LazyTown cover than a "metal about pirates" song.
Running Wild - Conquistadores
05/05/14, 16:18

OK, I'm going to have to take issue with Running Wild being called "pirate metal". They are not pirates. They are a power metal band with some pirate themed albums. We don't call Iron Maiden an Injun Metal band because of Run to the Hills, we don't call Blind Guardian a Hobbit Metal band because every other song is about Hobbits. NO! Consider this very song; it has nothing to do with pirates. They are not dressed like pirates, they are not singing about pirates, nothing. Compare and contrast with Alestorm, who live, drink, and shit piracy, until you wish they'd just shut up about it.
Alestorm - You Are a Pirate
05/05/14, 15:49

Well, alright, one or two pirate *albums*.
Alestorm - You Are a Pirate
05/05/14, 15:24

Were Running Wild pirate metal? I thought they were just plain old power metal with one or two pirate songs?
Hammond cop 'allegedly' abuses K-9 partner
05/05/14, 14:35

The porn site or the David Carradine?
Alestorm - You Are a Pirate
05/05/14, 13:53

Alestorm is an OK band with a great gimmick, and You Are a Pirate is an OK song with a great theme, but I can't help but feel that something is missing. They need the female singing parts; Robbie had some good songs, but Stephanie is the one who carried the show (musically in particular), and leaving her out of YAAP is like making a cake with no frosting.

Anyway, question: are there any OTHER pirate metal bands besides Alestorm? Alestorm is the only one I've ever heard, but if there are more I'm open to recommendations.
All Game of Thrones Deaths in Under 3 minutes
05/05/14, 13:28

NOT TODAY.
Police Say No SEMEN found in cupcakes shared by California teen at school
05/05/14, 12:51

I have heard soggy biscuit, limp biscuit, and ookie cookie. I have never heard cracker, and it is my understanding that "circle jerk" is a generic term for group-clopping and need not include soggy biscuits.
Come My Lady - MySpace Crush (Second Video)
05/05/14, 09:51

Well now I would like to see a crush video starring Stephanie from Lazytown.

I would make it myself, but I am worried that I might not have the proper skills to do so. Something like this video would surely take hundreds of man hours and thosuands of dollars worth of equipment, yes?
Hammond cop 'allegedly' abuses K-9 partner
05/05/14, 05:47

You could try Motherless. That's usually the best place to find choking porn, assuming it hasn't been shut down.

Just please don't go all David Carradine on us, or, if you do, could you at least write a shout-out to poeTV on your body in magic marker, so when the cops find you they'll be all, hey, look at this cryptic message, let's call the news and tell them about it. SUDDEN E-FAME.
Crazy Town - Butterfly (Loop Cover)
05/05/14, 05:14

Well, I enjoyed this unironically. It's the musical equivalent of one of those beautiful junk sculptures made by redneck outsider artists. Instead of rusty car parts, his canvas is shit songs.
Fox News Cuts Away From Obama Press Conference Because Nobody's Asking About Benghazi
05/05/14, 04:41

Is the outrage faux, is the indifference faux, are both the outrage and the indifference faux, or is there a mixture of sincerity and callous partisan self-interest to both sides?

Actively spreading misinformation about a brutal terrorist attack and then covering it up to protect the short-term political interests of the parties involved may not be the biggest thing we have to worry about at the moment (lord knows the US is involved in much worse stuff than one CIA psyop), but I have to wonder: if George and Dick had been caught doing this (and they most certainly did this), would everyone just not care, and maybe even turn the scandal into an opportunity to bitch about Democratic pettiness? Or would there be just as much outrage and indifference, merely flipped around along gang lines?
Come My Lady - MySpace Crush (Second Video)
05/05/14, 04:20

Lazytown is a great show and I don't appreciate you people bullying it.
Come My Lady - MySpace Crush (Second Video)
05/04/14, 17:00

Also, were they the band on that one episode of Pamela Anderson's VIP? I can't remember, but it seems like something they'd do.
Come My Lady - MySpace Crush (Second Video)
05/04/14, 16:58

Well something must have triggered it. I can't imagine anyone not currently living in 2001 looking for Crazy Town videos, unless something really bizarre happened.
Aboard the A380
05/04/14, 16:04

GUYS! GUYS! WE SHOULDN'T BE FIGHTING EACH OTHER! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT!

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