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EvilHomer

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Comments
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/17/15, 14:15

Looking into it further, apparently mannitol is also used as a diuretic (something which makes you pee):

http://www.peteducation.com/article.cfm?c=26+1303&aid=1434

So enough mannitol gummy bears, and you should have a very distressed pissing, shitting, barfing chihuahua on your hands. PROBABLY a little worse than a barking one.

Also, forgot stars.
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/17/15, 14:08

Toothpaste is another good source of sugar alcohol, particularly name brand stuff. (it makes me ill, usually a few hours after using it) If you can't find gummy bears, maybe try squirting a tube of Colgate on the chihuahua?
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/17/15, 13:58

Here's an interesting nutrition advisory from the Yale New Haven Hospital:

http://www.ynhh.org/about-us/sugar_alcohol.aspx

Mannitol seems to be the most effective laxative, so if you could find sugarfree gummy bears with mannitol in them, they might be your best bet.
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/17/15, 13:54

You'd have to experiment first. I believe veteranians use sugar alcohols in a pure form - they aren't just shoveling sugarfree gummy bears into dogs' mouths, since sugarfree gummy bears contain a lot of non-laxative components, and as Philomena Cunk learned in her recent segment on Medicines, doctors are hesitant to give their patients tasty medicines, like crisps or gummy bears. I don't know precisely how many sugarfree gummy bears it would take to give a chihuahua the shits - probably not too many, since they're small dogs - but I'm sure there are other, faster, and more direct methods of getting said chihuahua to shut up.
Final Fantasy 15 Summon
03/17/15, 11:37

Why does the ground and all the trees go back to normal?
Jim Cornette Discusses the Insane Clown Posse
03/17/15, 08:44

The thing that really gets me about Cornette is how so many of his rants can be boiled down to the statement: "The wrestling industry has ceded too much power to the consumers, and I am upset over the resultant loss of privilege!"

Cornette is an arrogant, hopelessly out-of-touch, elitist pig. He sees wrestling fans - his own customers - as a pack of inbred servile morons, and feels genuinely threatened when the working classes do something other than dance jigs for all the bright, sparkly bullshit that he jangles in front of their eyes. He makes some good observations - a lot of good observations, actually - but the perspective he comes from and the conclusions he draws are almost invariably awful.
Jim Cornette Discusses the Insane Clown Posse
03/17/15, 08:15

Jim Cornette is such a butthole. What did he ever do that was so great, huh? Trashtalking Vince Russo and apparently being unaware that Juggalos ARE a religious community. He's right about the ICP being a pair of spineless, cowardly pussies ("cautious, professional businessmen", if you want to be nice about it), but almost everything else Cornette says is BS.
Jim Cornette Discusses the Insane Clown Posse
03/17/15, 07:55

It was actually a multi-layered comment! First layer, it was meant as a defense of wrestling; illustrating the positive influence that pro wrestling has on society. Second layer, it was a dis directed at yogarfield; John Cena is one of the worst wrestlers in history, so by juxtaposing John Cena with yogarfield, I am implying that yogarfield is worse than the worst wrestler.
DIC's live action intros for Sailor Moon
03/17/15, 06:57

No, this is Sailor Moon, not Applejack.
CheeseburgerX on Failed Relationships and Fleshlights
03/17/15, 06:14

Oh man!

https://youtu.be/z3zSdApv4Nw

Which one of you owns this channel?
CheeseburgerX on Failed Relationships and Fleshlights
03/17/15, 06:00

Oh my god! It really is a facemapped cgi cheeseburger! "facemapped cgi cheeseburger" tag, please!

Also, "Demonius X"
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/17/15, 05:56

Yes and no. Sugar alcohols have a tendency to induce diarrhea - our friend sorbitol, for example, draws water into the lower intestines, triggering bouts of massive watery shits (I do not know much about other sugar alcohols, but I imagine the mechanism is largely the same).

Sugarfree sweeteners are good laxatives, particularly when used responsibly in emergency situations (I have read reports of them being fed to sick dogs in order to induce rapid rectal purging), but they are not a good choice if your goal is to pass healthy stool on a safe, regular basis.
DIC's live action intros for Sailor Moon
03/17/15, 05:33

It's a reference to their outfits, which are patterned on a Japanese school uniform known as the sailor fuku. This name, in turn, was derived from the fact that said school uniforms were based on the outfits of the British Royal Navy.

In-universe, it's also important to remember that the Sailor Senshi were all natives to a Lunar kingdom that existed in ancient times, long predating the English language, let alone the first recorded use of the word "sailor" in it's currently intelligible context (according to various etymological sources, this occured in the 16th century). It is entirely possible, indeed likely, that in the Moonese language the word "Sailor" meant something entirely different from what it means today - not only were there no/ few tall ships on the moon, thus rendering the word contextually meaningless in it's original incarnation as "someone who travels the ocean on a sail-powered boat", but it also seems to have been a noble title of some prestige, like "knight" or "Viscountess". Indeed, it's even possible that the word "Sailor" is wrong, the result of an English mistranslation! In the original Japanese media, the word used to identify the girls is セーラー (Sērā). In a normal context, this would indeed translate to "Sailor", but only assuming that the word they are using is English in origin, and not Moonese! Why would Moonese girls living in Japan be using an English term for a position that has existed in their society for thousands of years, if not more? It *could* be that they are actually *Sērās*, and not Sailors - a false cognate, leading to a mistranslation that has gone uncorrected now for decades.
Akron Police on the hunt for a Serial Pooper
03/16/15, 22:05

Depends on what sweeteners are used in the gummy bears, but yes, it's most likely true. Sugarfree foods do a number on my stomache; sorbitol, in particular, tastes foul and makes me shit my brains out.
Dateline segment on Sailor Moon
03/16/15, 21:43

Just to be clear, whether Mars is third or fourth depends on whether we are ranking them by Coolest Senshi, or by Senshi I'd Most Want in Bed.
Dateline segment on Sailor Moon
03/16/15, 21:38

Yeah, I rolled my eyes at that part, too. Blah blah Mercury this Mercury that. So many dang Mercury fans!!! She's not terrible, and you're right about her being second place... but she's second to Moon. You should know this already. Mars is fourth, distant third at best.

I think I recognized his Mercury Shrine, though.
DIC's live action intros for Sailor Moon
03/16/15, 21:29

Wouldn't be my first choice, but she'll do.
Jim Cornette Discusses the Insane Clown Posse
03/16/15, 19:07

Here's a question: how many Make A Wish kids asked to meet yogarfield last year?
Good-bye, Mr. Hooper
03/16/15, 13:20

I'm sorry for your loss, John.

Do you have a picture of your cat?
Is Anime/Manga too mainstream now?!
03/16/15, 11:08

Don't judge. Anime gives the people what they want; it's not anime's fault that what the people want is incest and fanservice.

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