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Quad9Damage

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Comments
Top 10 questions about Doug
05/23/13, 10:45

Touché.
Xbox One Reveal 2013 Highlights
05/23/13, 10:00

Xbox One New Retail Copy Per Console Only, Unless You Pay Us a Fee.

Microsoft is doing surprisingly well with their business model of charging their customers for what others offer for nothing. I mean they've already established that wonderful annual subscription plan for Office 2013. They already make their users pay a $ 60 annual Gold fee to watch video streaming services that are already being paid for monthly. They already charge developers $ 40,000 per patch (although I'm not sure if Sony does the same thing, so maybe that doesn't count?)

Hell, I guess I shouldn't be shocked that Microsoft's next goal is to cripple the used game market and stuff their pockets. On the other hand, fuck Xbox One. I'll just Goo Gone up my Super Nintendo if this is the way console gaming is going.
Top 10 questions about Doug
05/23/13, 09:33

Is it wrong that I kind of want to see that?
Top 10 questions about Doug
05/23/13, 09:33

I'm amazed that there are even three questions to ask about "Doug," let alone ten. "Doug" was what I flipped past when "Rocko's Modern Life" or "Ren & Stimpy" wasn't on.

One time I posted a YouTube comment where I praised that "Doug: The Movie" live-action trailer as being an epic reshaping of a boring-ass cartoon. I was met with negative downvotes and one individual calling me an idiot who possessed no analytical or critical thinking skills because "Doug" was beautiful and symbolic and metaphorical and brilliant social commentary and how dare I. I opted not to argue with this person—some battles just aren't worth it.
Opie and Anthony and Patrice O'Neal - Syfy Movies
05/22/13, 21:11

Obviously "Alien" would be "Spaceship Monster"
Patrice O'Neal and Friends Rip Apart 'Independence Day' (Opie & Anthony)
05/22/13, 15:16

Patrice had the ability to unearth things others were either blind to or didn't want to admit.

Vivica Fox bonding with the First Lady is absolute horseshit. It either sends a terrible message ("Look audience, the whore who shows her tits for money is odd-coupled with elegant decency!") or the writers had no clue where it was going. Her being a stripper was fine until they used it as a hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold plot device.

It should have stayed completely irrelevant to the story or otherwise been omitted from the script because what they did with it was just awful. Oh, and Will Smith can't become an astronaut because he's engaged to a stripper? Seriously, what is this shit?
'God Will Fuck You Up' by John Butler
05/21/13, 23:19

He turned that bitch to salt!
Patrice O'Neal and Friends Rip Apart 'Independence Day' (Opie & Anthony)
05/21/13, 21:57

Patrice had the world's most infectious laugh. I couldn't help but laugh along with him, every time.
Patrice O'Neal and Friends Rip Apart 'Independence Day' (Opie & Anthony)
05/21/13, 16:58

YOU KNEW THEEEN!
Patrice O'Neal and Friends Rip Apart 'Independence Day' (Opie & Anthony)
05/21/13, 15:57

Had a stroke, completely lost all muscle movement, lost the ability to speak, and then died during his hospital stay.

He once joked during this show that cookies were poison to him. No kidding. It's really fucking sad.
Patrice O'Neal and Friends Rip Apart 'Independence Day' (Opie & Anthony)
05/21/13, 14:48

This movie was an absolute blast when I was 12, all the way through. It slowly grew worse the older I got, but it was bad a fun way. By the time I'd hit my late 20's it wasn't even fun-bad anymore. There's something about Will Smith shuckin' and jivin' through the desert after his friend's dead and his fiancee MIGHT be dead that's just...wrong. I can't even enjoy Jeff "Knowledge Through Osmosis" Goldblum anymore. This clip is a cleansing catharsis for me.
LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN O'BRIEN inserts George Takei as Sulu into a clip from STAR TREK: GENERATIONS
05/20/13, 05:37

Hopefully this trend continues and Takei gets inserted into clips of "Shit My Dad Says"
Pocahontas Farts Her Goodbye To John Smith
05/20/13, 05:32

That is the correct way to end this abortion fart of a movie.
Clocktower 3 : The Corroder
05/18/13, 08:07

So far this game's been a cross between gut-wrenching horror and a Saturday morning cartoon. The first serial killer beans a 12-year-old girl over the skull with a hammer and rolls her bloody corpse down some stairs. Later on her ghost sobs as she tries to play blood-drenched piano keys.

In-between and after that it's "Scooby Doo." You run in and out of doors while the monster chases you, usually in the same hallway. You escape by springing silly traps like luggage piles and fire pokers. The only thing that would make it more complete is if the soundtrack was The Monkees and Alyssa could dress in disguises to fool Sledgehammer.
Pat Robertson: Husband Cheated But 'Well, He's A Man'
05/17/13, 13:25

10 years ago his withered old cock would have still been dead. No amount of blood thinner or Viagra is going to wake up that cobwebbed trouser corpse. Unless he's getting dates mixed up in his senile brain.
Pat Robertson: Husband Cheated But 'Well, He's A Man'
05/17/13, 12:41

Whether she's being careful enough.
Pat Robertson: Husband Cheated But 'Well, He's A Man'
05/17/13, 06:59

This has been my morning 'what the fuck!?" Shit's like milk and oatmeal bars, thanks POETV.
Jiz - Break like a hymen
05/15/13, 07:15

Beautifully offensive and hilarious, "Jiz" does not raise or lower the bar. Rather, it uses the bar to shred through our sensibilities cleaner than a primed virgin during her long-awaited prom overnight party. Sienna DEnema has elevated the magnum opus "Jiz" to a level far above Rosie O'Donnell funny and even Sarah Silverman funny.

- Quad9damage, "Rolling Tranny" magazine
Ender's Game: trailer
05/11/13, 07:33

Damn, Harrison Ford is old now. Also wouldn't it be hilarious if the studio decided that one of the kids will be gay? I'd love to read Card's awful homophobic rant response.
Community's D&D Episode 'sex scene'
05/11/13, 07:21

Roll saving throw vs. cumming too early or the elf maiden turning out to be a succubus.

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