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Quad9Damage

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Comments
Psalty: Happy Re-birthday!
09/07/11, 23:17

Not if you're a Regular Nerd. Regular Nerds have comics, sci-fi, anime and Dungeons & Dragons to keep them entertained. Christian Nerds on the other hand have... Psalty videos. And whatever Focus on the Family puts out, I guess.
Psalty - Eaten by Cannibals!
09/07/11, 23:09

I don't know what kind of cannibals prefer a meal of burned paper and melted binding glue. Maybe they are actually atheists who are burning him to protest the spread of the Gospel.

Oh, and *Risky Rat* put him in this situation!? How did he do that? Did he just annoy the shit out of some people until they got angry and took it out on Psalty?
Psalty - meet Risky Rat, whatever that is
09/07/11, 23:00

Watching all of these Psalty clips has opened my eyes to how difficult being a child of fundamentalist Christian parents must be. Think about how shitty your situation is. You're not allowed to watch cartoons, you're not allowed to watch movies, and you're not allowed to play with other children unless they ALSO have fundamentalist Christian parents. The only sources of entertainment you are permitted are insufferable shit videos like the Psalty series, and I know if I were an unfortunate kid being forced to watch Psalty by my asshole parents, his horrible puppet face would burn itself permanently into my nightmares after five minutes. If you're going to indoctrinate your children, why the fuck do it in such a traumatizing way?
Psalty - meet Risky Rat, whatever that is
09/07/11, 22:54

He's clearly an atheist, a flaming homosexual stereotype, and a progressive liberal straw man. He wants to lure children away from Jesus because... um... that's what "those people" do. I like how the first diabolical deed he recapped was simply BEING ANNOYING.
Psalty - Flying lizard puppet wants you to stop staring at the hand in his butt & buy Psalty's crap
09/07/11, 22:22

Was Solomon the Supersonic Salamander speaking another fucking language or something?
Psalty: Happy Re-birthday!
09/07/11, 11:01

Oh, I get it! She's one of those 'smart types.' Thinking she's all fancy with her intelligence and books and critical thinking and whatnot. But we know what to do, don't we kids? We'll use the power of JESUS to set her straight! There's only one book you need to read, honey. It's not the talking blue abomination standing over there, though.
Psalty - Eaten by Cannibals!
09/07/11, 10:42

SPOILER: The Lord didn't intervene, the Cannibals ate Psalty, and he was reincarnated as a much more horrible looking human/book hybrid who wore blackface and terrified children with songs of God's love.
Wendy's employee messed up Jawsus's order.
09/07/11, 10:37

When did he get into Jesus? I thought Jawsus cursed like a sailor, watched South Park and was all "DID YOU SHIT ON HIS WINDSHIELD" and "WHAT, YOUR DICK?" while conversing with his drunk dad. But JESUS would've gotten HIS Baconator.
9/11 - Coloring Book Graphic Novel We Shall Never Forget
09/07/11, 10:24

"I'm going to paint the man with the beard green so that he is a Namekian and the guy with the gun shooting him is one of Freeza's men."

"Why are you beating me??"
9/11 - Coloring Book Graphic Novel We Shall Never Forget
09/07/11, 10:21

I like the page where half of it is text vividly describing a military raid to children, and the rest is a picture of bin Laden with this "Damn, son!" look on his face, hiding behind a woman while a SEAL'S bullet races toward him.

"Be sure to stay inside the lines, Haley. It will show 9/11 victims more respect."
Wendy's employee messed up Jawsus's order.
09/07/11, 10:12

"She didn't understand my order well because English wasn't her first language? That FUCKING BITCH! I mean fuck, what a goddamn bitch. You're a bitch for not learning English you bitch."

"People obviously like me and all my fans aren't trolls, so I am going to post this bullshit later."
Jawsus explains the London riots for you
09/07/11, 09:56

Wow, Pruane is what, 15 now? It feels like it's been about 3 years since I watched a video of his. He hasn't grown much, and his voice is still as nasally and insufferable as ever.

And he has barely changed his room.
A Fruity Pebbles Christmas
09/07/11, 09:48

Yes, I think this commercial is deeply embedded in the memories of every person who watched any given amount of cartoons in the 90s. I can recall the entire damn thing and I didn't even watch the video clip. Post must've had some insane advertising dollars.

I also think this is a dupe, but Christmas is the season to be sharing, so sharing it again is okay!

Alan Moore: The Limitation of Western Thought
09/05/11, 21:42

Go find a picture of him. He looks exactly like you'd expect.
Alan Moore: The Limitation of Western Thought
09/05/11, 21:34

I believe this is from "The Mindscape of Alan Moore," a documentary from a few years back. Basically he spends a very brief amount of time discussing his major graphic novels and the ideas behind them (including Lost Girls, his fairytale loli porno book) and then plunges into a wild tangent talking about God knows what for an hour over video of random shit. It may catch you off guard if you go into the movie expecting to just hear him talk about "V for Vendetta" and suddenly he's off on another planet somewhere with his thoughts.
Poopdeck Pappy
09/05/11, 20:53

Popeye was an emo kid in his youth.
Poopdeck Pappy
09/05/11, 20:52

Popeye is kind of an asshole for taking the bed and forcing his senile elderly father to sleep in an uncomfortable hammock where he could fall in the middle of the night and seriously injure himself.

Seeing an entire group of bar patrons try to dogpile on an old man and crush his brittle bones under their weight sure is something. Dave Fleischer came up with a viral video concept decades before the coining of the phrase.
More Psalty the Singing Songbook
09/05/11, 20:29

Well, it's not 'book-on-book' sex per se. When in season, the anthropomorphic book reproduces by fucking a copy machine. Nothing to it really.
More Psalty the Singing Songbook
09/05/11, 12:29

... Wait, I just found out all the other Psalty videos are EIT. I just assumed this was the kind of thing they would cover.
More Psalty the Singing Songbook
09/05/11, 11:26

Yeah, what the fuck was that? I mean I saw the tag before I got to that part, but I just assumed it was a joke because the walking songbook kind of looked like he was wearing blackface.

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