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|Mortal Kombat vs. Oregon Trail|
the best part of having Sub-Zero in the group is the easy river crossing.
|Zero Punctuation - Battlefield: Bad Company 2|
first person spooger.
|Aging SNL Ditz/Tea Partier sings 'There's a Communist in the White House'|
Yeah, I thought she was hot, too. I can add her to the "Glad I never got to hit it" list.
|Country Bear Jamboree|
I thought it was a trailer for Fallout: New Vegas.
|Dan Quinn's last video before he went to jail.|
Now that I've looked this guy up, I know he's totally insane - here's a Something Awful article with a video he did, if you guys are cool with that.
|Dan Quinn's last video before he went to jail.|
I have no clue what he's fucking talking about. Hit too many times in the head + getting high seems to equal broken thought patterns and unfinished sentences.
|Man displays sign outside bar claiming Obama is N***er Riggin Healthcare|
well yeah, and he's got an NAACP membership card!
|Don't Look Back in Anger|
I guess you have to be careful what you joke about, even if it seems really funny at the time.
|Dokken - Dream Warriors|
I remember seeing this video one night with an old D&D buddy of mine and starting an argument over whether we should make a "Summon Dokken" spell in our AD&D 2nd Edition campaign.
|Survival Seed Bank|
Even better, listen to the audio testimonials. The Dean of Consciousness from the International Metaphysical University talking about bartering seeds, and burying the package for safekeeping, is enough to get you through any comedy-starved periods in the future, should good humor collapse and "funny" be scarce.
|Survival Seed Bank|
Been to the site, it sucks. They don't tell people about growing zones or even how to start seeds off or give watering instructions or tell them what kinds of fertilizers would be good for each kind of seed. They don't even give a good amount of seeds. You can do much better on Ebay and make up the difference with seed starter kits at Wal*Mart.
Besides, if the world should end in Winter, what then? Your seeds alone would be useless until at least March, and in some places, April, and you wouldn't actually get that food until June or July. Your family could be eaten by cannibals long before then.
|Everything is Terrible - I'm just a Stone|
You see kids, God loves us all and you're not supposed to kill because God said so, but if God personally makes an exception and says you're the guy who's going to kill another guy, then you're just supposed to do it because it's God will, and if that doesn't make sense to you then that means you need to pray to God until you have the faith to where A. it does make sense or B. it doesn't have to make sense as long as you obey.
|The Thing With Two Heads (1975) Trailer|
It's so bad, so awful, especially the parts where they're on a bike and you can clearly tell it's just two guys sitting really close to each other, like when they hit the bump and one guy separates from the other - and the car crashes, man. Why does the hood fly off the police car before it lands? Just boom, there goes the hood, GTA 3 style. I must now make it my purpose to track this movie down and watch it at least once a year on a day that will be known as "The Thing With Two Heads Viewing Day". It will be my own personal holiday.
|Trade Your Bibles For Porn!|
Or you can trade about every five minutes or so, glue some of the porn and/or holy book pages together, and make unsavory gestures in between visits. Failing that, you can just keep trading until you finally get the porn you really wanted in the first place, and shout "YES! Thanks to the Christians, I finally got the porn I always wanted, and it only took 63 Bibles to get it!"
It's all fun and games until they do the other hole and you have the Glitter Shitter.
|Business Card - How to make people angry|
That's some kind of business samurai technique.
I'm really hoping this is some early April Fools thing.
|Roger Ebert Gets A New Voice|
I had no idea he had a black wife, either.
|Bizkit the 'sleepwalking' dog|
There was one time, when I was roommates with my younger brother, and we were living in a small apartment, where I woke up because I heard him slam the door. Now, I was working nights, and he worked days, and I woke up going "what the hell's his problem?" It was about time for me to wake up anyway, as he'd just come home from work.
I went about my business that afternoon, didn't see much of my brother, had dinner, got ready for work, and before I left, I caught up with him and asked him if he had a bad day at work or if someone had done something to upset him, because I was sure I heard him slam the door earlier. He told me "Yeah, man! You cussed me the fuck out earlier!" Naturally, I was confused, so I asked "What do you mean? "and he replied "I JUST walked in the door, and you go 'What the fuck do you want, bitch?' and I was like '...Excuse me?' and you said 'I SAID, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT, BITCH?' and I was so mad, I wanted to knock you out, man, so I just got the fuck out of there." and then I had to apologize profusely, and explain how sometimes I talk to people in my sleep and I'm not always kind, but it's not really "ME" and I'm not sure what it is, but it's not my conscious self talking to people, and sometimes I even do worse, like wake up swinging at people if they touch me in my sleep, I had to tell him about the one time I almost kicked our mom in the face when she woke me up years before this and again, had to apologize to her, too. I still don't know to this day what flavor of crazy my brother thinks I am, but he's been known to sleepwalk so he can't say much, at least not on that issue.
|Highliner goes for a stroll at Lost Arrow, Yosemite, with his tight rope|
the music eerily fits the Rescue Ranger story. I don't know what's more depressing, the idea of a nice old man waking up knowing he's just going to end up scraping someone's guts into a Hefty bag, wondering why and how he got into that line of work in the first place when all he really wanted to do was try to help the living, or opening the bag for the family members to try to identify the corpse and the gripping horror of the realization combined with the stench of hot death hitting them at the same time.
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