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IrishWhiskey

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Comments
Sandra Lee - Grandma Lorraine's Single Layer Birthday Cakes
12/03/14, 20:34

I always wanted to be like my Grandma Lorraine. She worked in the cafeteria, and was a great chef.

You see I told my Grandma Lorraine about how I wanted to be the prettiest, thinnest, blondest girl in the school. And she promised "You will baby, you will. When you go to the dance, everyone is going to look at you and think that there is the prettiest princess." And Grandma made that happen.

You see whenever Grandma Lorraine made her school cafeteria food, she added a little bit of her love for me, in the form of high fructose corn syrup. Peach syrup, raspberry extract, oil, butter, whatever she could slip in. The lettuce was sweeter than a June sunrise. For the cake mix she went store bought, but she made her own frosting with lard and food coloring.

Each day I went to the bathroom and threw up what little I ate, just like Grandma told me to. And before too long, I was the prettiest, thinnest girl in the school, while that bitch Melanie was ballooning up. She went to fat camp every summer, but Grandma Lorraine still made sure that when I went to prom, no one had a smaller dress size than me.

People would ask Grandma Lorraine what she'd put in her recipes, but she wouldn't tell them. Not even the police when they confronted her with evidence after three diabetic kids died in one year. But I can share it with you now. Because Grandma Lorraine loved me so much she was willing to go to jail for me.

And now you can share that love with your kids.
Douchemaster gives you a tour of Poseidon's Fortress
12/03/14, 14:55

It adds a lot. There's a constant combination in the same sentence of "This is a special mystical evocative part of the house which I thought seriously about" and "by which I mean it's a band logo I put some LEDs behind in colors I like."

The (plastic?) Marlin he claims he caught has a spear "that rivals Poseidon's Trident", the red LED gives the house a beating heart, the eye gives it vision, and so forth.
Douchemaster gives you a tour of Poseidon's Fortress
12/03/14, 14:21

Nice backyard. Decorating sense of a 12 year old who read a new age Aquaman rip-off comic book in the 80s and has no imagination beyond 'LEDS EVERYWHERE!', but nice backyard.

All that granite and tile is just going to be awful 70% of the year round in Minnesota. You gotta wear think socks every night to bed or leave the heating on overnight, otherwise you'll wake up every morning and freeze your toes to the floor.
Black Guy Stopped By Cop For Keeping His Hands Warm
12/03/14, 12:45

"Treyvon was not carrying just skittles. He was carrying skittles, robitussin DM, and arizona tea. "

Whatever website you get your news from was wrong. The only active or potentially active drug ingredient you mentioned is Robitussin, and he wasn't carrying that. Skittles and iced tea are not essential drug ingredients for anything, they just get mixed with medicine and alcohol in general to make it taste sweeter, like all candies and sodas.

It's an amazing train of logic. Shooting kids is wrong, but shooting kids who have candy is more okay because they could mix candy with an intoxicant to make it sweeter, which could in rare cases in the long term make it more likely for them to do something provocative which could have made shooting them slightly more understandable, if still totally unjustified.

Is reason a color? Because if so, I agree you are colorblind.
Black Guy Stopped By Cop For Keeping His Hands Warm
12/03/14, 11:12

Stopping someone for hanging around a store a while ago and not even asking what they were doing there, is only marginally better than stopping them for having their hands in their pockets. Still doesn't make the cops explanation less absurd sounding though.
Black Guy Stopped By Cop For Keeping His Hands Warm
12/03/14, 10:05

To be fair, that cop had no way of knowing he wasn't holding a packet of Skittles in his pockets, and we can't see whether this guy was wearing a hoodie.
Alpha House - Trailer
10/28/14, 11:31

I notice they have all the set-up for a movie that mines it's comedy from practical jokes... and no practical jokes.

The line "we do everything we can to run the Deltas out of this place" is followed by a shot of a guy just banging pans at the girls. No swapping their make-up with bear attractant, no airbags in their office chairs, no replacing their guest speaker at a fancy party with a stripper, no building a robot to infiltrate as their house mother, nothing.

Could they not think of any? Because they could just watch Screwballs II and steal their jokes. It's not like anyone's expecting creativity, but at least some effort when ripping things off would be nice.
Perescuted (2014) - Trailer
10/25/14, 13:15

"Your ministry reaches more people than the evening news."

Does is also reach more people than the newspaper? The radio? Wireless telegraphy? There wasn't even a single shot of a computer or hacker used to track a government fugitive in this conspiracy movie. As if we didn't already know this is a movie by old people terrified of modern society, for old people terrified of modern society.
Blood Sugar Duck Magic
09/17/14, 22:04

You have to marvel at the lack of self-awareness that comes from using heaven exactly like the 'farm upstate where Rover went to live but we can't visit him', and still thinking it's real.
James Randi and Scientology
09/07/14, 02:42

Yes, skepticism is all about running from physical truth. They avoid it without fail.

No wait, that's one of the dumbest statements I've heard. Skepticism is a necessary step on the path to truth, you can't engage in truth seeking without it. Even if using this to apply to James Randi specifically it's incredibly stupid. If he runs from truth without fail, and disbelieves all crackpot claims presented, then presumably all crackpots all correct, even the crackpots that contradict the other crackpots.

If the true believers are deluded, and the skeptics don't believe the true believers, the skeptics can't be wrong. I don't know how you found a way to feel superior to both groups in a binary true/false situation.

Or I guess more to the point: What deluded nonsense is it that you believe that skeptics don't, which leads to this bitterness?
Promo for The Simpsons on FXX - Deedley
09/06/14, 14:18

Stupid sexy Flanders.
Korra battles Zaheer
08/30/14, 15:17

I think your biggest gripe is the series' strongest character arc. She's not a faux action girl, and the characterization of her being beat up and tortured, while true, is undermined by the fact that she decided the course of action after rebelling against and overriding the people who wanted to protect her, her decision last season to open the portals, and the kick ass fighting in the clip above. People want to hide her away because the Avatar state is permanently threatened, but she doesn't let them, and that's pretty consistent.

Since series 1 they've been stripping away or threatening her Avatar identity. She defined herself from the start as 'the Avatar' and not much else, and was eager to prove that after being sheltered from harm all her life. Then she lost her bending season 1, and was about to commit suicide. Having an 'Avatar' around was more important than her life, and she didn't consider herself anything without it. She's lost her connection to the past lives, now her mobility and probably bending again, and repeatedly been at the brink of losing the Avatar forever. People don't see her as a hero, they despise her for the trouble spirits cause.

The best moment from the finale was after Jinorra, looking just like Aang, someone who comes across as a better Avatar when dealing with the spirit realm and who saved Korra in both last seasons, took over the Avatar's responsibilities. With all the best intentions, they told clearly depressed Korra she's not needed anymore, and the season ended on that body blow.

She takes every loss as her failure to live up to the title, even though she's making good hard decisions that have undone what Aang and based Avatar's caused by their failures. She's restored the imbalance caused by Wan, and undone Aang's failure to stop the Fire Nation's massacre. Granted they had good reasons as well, they weren't gods who could stop everything. But Korra judges herself by an impossible standard.

She's been asked repeatedly in the spirit world and elsewhere, who she considers herself to be other than just the Avatar. And she's not answered it yet. Aang ran away from his responsibilities and didn't want the power, he wanted to be himself. He had to painfully grow up into the role, including facing that he needed to murder someone. Korra has the opposite path. She has to find herself and learn to be more than a combat hero, which makes sense given the nature of the Avatar as someone who brings balance.

As for the others, yeah season 2's characterization wasn't great. But your complaint about Mako and Asami having a forced romance is out of date, they've barely interacted this season, instead both were useful, although not with major character arcs. And while Bolin is overly comic for the shows tone sometimes, he's miles more restrained than Sokka.
Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas Trailer
08/28/14, 21:02

Maybe Dennis Miller contributed some of the jokes.
Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas Trailer
08/28/14, 17:31

The character is supposed to represent the white Christian male, so his name is Christian White. This was the actual explanation by Kirk Cameron, showing off the knowledge learned from failing to read a book on screenwriting.

I'm guessing the name of the guy at the end then is Minstrel Black. And the antagonist is called Strawman Atheist.
BNP Youth Party Ad
08/24/14, 23:38

They're white supremacists whose definition of "our culture" is the same ignorant nonsense every generation of close minded people spouts. Culture is always changing, trying to keep that from happening by discriminating against everyone not like you is a stupid idea.

"What's wrong with having a national identity? "

It's wrong when defining it to exclude people not like you, trying to take away the rights of people in the nation to be different.

"Can only white people be racist?"

Nope. But you might have noticed there's a strong association between people who complain about being labeled racists, and racists.

"Rampant multiculturalism is a disease."

Basically proving the point. I've never heard anyone say that who wasn't a bigot. No, multiculturalism isn't a disease, it's where your culture, whatever it is, came from. Cultures are not homogeneous and unchanging.

"If others cannot be ashamed to celebrate their culture and heritage, then neither will I."

Between the Olympics and the Jubilee, there's been worldwide coverage the last few years of pride in British culture and heritage. You might notice those events didn't define it as excluding people from different ethnic backgrounds, and paranoid fears about Muslims taking over.
Guy Calls Comcast Customer Support
08/14/14, 19:37

CIWB, stop picking on people selling drugs to kids. Don't you know that society forced them to, in order to feed their kids?

Unless they fed drugs to their kids, which would mean they no longer have to sell drugs to other kids to feed their kids, but stupid society has laws against that too.

I think all of us can agree we'd all be better off without the values of society.
GOP Rep. Mo Brooks: Democrats Waging A 'War On Whites'
08/10/14, 17:34

Copypaste Jon Stewart's comment "You have confused a war on religion with not getting everything you want", replace religion with white privilege.

"turn it into a racial issue, which is an emotional issue, rather than a thoughtful issue"

I see, so any discussion or race and racism is an 'emotional' issue. While rational minded men like himself campaign on fear of immigrants, fear of gays, fear of Islam, fear of abortion, fear of environmentalists, fear of single women,fear of the UN, fear of changing gender norms, fear of deficits, fear of the end times, fear of vaccines, fear of socialists, fear of tyranny, fear of black helicopters and anger at all those people making them so afraid. But thoughtfully.
Boehner Impeachment Talk Coming From White House & Democrats
07/30/14, 21:43

And in the town hall meetings with their primary voters it's:

"I totally support impeachment at a minimum, and let's all acknowledge that he's a tyrant, we're like the American revolutionaries... He's like an abuser, we're the battered wife... We're the neighborhood watch and he's the kid in the hoodie with skittles... Is that good enough? Can I keep my seat now or do I have to actually say it directly then walk it back in the national media?"
Fliptree: Best Idea - Dinesh D'Souza
07/26/14, 10:28

So it's a regular $30 discount plastic tree, that someone built an unnecessary flipping mechanism onto to pretend it's different.


I guess they thought the guy who sold America as this land which has never killed any Native Americans, stolen any land, engaged in unjust wars, or been mean to black people, could sell anything. Except his movies and books don't sell ideas, they just reassure people that their stupid, stupid purchases were a good idea all along. This shouldn't be an ad, but a video the complaints department of Fliptree sends their callers.
Slacker on 'Who wants to be a millionaire', $250k question is about 'Office Space'
07/24/14, 21:47

No, no. He said Superman III was the best movie ever. And he's right.

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