IrishWhiskey
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Rush Limbaugh shills Pizza Hut
09/26/11, 03:11
So to be clear: They hired Rush Limbaugh to say "I'm always 'right', but it'd be 'wrong' to eat pizza crust first!" in order to demonstrate that people should eat crust first.
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Mitchell and Webb - The Evil Vicar
09/18/11, 06:19
That may have been more information than the response called for.
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Mitchell and Webb - The Evil Vicar
09/18/11, 06:07
Except for the parts in the NT where he promises to destroy free will and end all life on earth, sends bears to maul and devour innocent children, continues to endorse slavery, and changes the punishment for non-belief of himself from death to an infinite torture for infinite length, even for those who haven't heard of him.
He has other people speak for him (including those who wrote the gospels centuries after his kid died and contradict recorded history) and they tend to reinforce more post-Bronze age moral norms, but he himself doesn't get any mellower. I mean, he brutally killed himself as a human sacrifice to himself so that he could lay a guilt trip on humanity, so that he'd lift a curse he placed on all innocent babies ever, because he once created a talking snake and used it to tell the truth to a woman who'd act again his own lies without being physically able to understand the consequences. Even though he created the system with full knowledge of how it'd turn out, and that he'd need to do tons of course-correcting measured in human bloodshed.
Yahweh makes sense if he's weak, evil, or his rationality and logic is so alien as to be to us appear insane. Anything else is wishful thinking. |
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Mitchell and Webb - The Evil Vicar
09/18/11, 02:35
As an atheist, I'm totally on the vicar's side here.
Yahweh isn't your cheery puppet to agree with you when you can't otherwise justify an opinion, then change his mind when you do. He's either a tyrannical badass motherfucker, or a fictional tyrannical badass motherfucker.
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Pat Robertson: caller asks about wife with severe Alzheimer's
09/15/11, 01:56
The evil is that if this were a woman asking about her Alzheimer ridden husband he'd tell her to shut up and submit.
It's theoretically possible he's completely rejected his past lifetime of theology in which he explicitly told women they would go to hell for not marrying and obeying their rapists and abusers and instead recognized that the brain's mechanical capacity defines our identity and relationships rather than any fictional soul, but I seriously fucking doubt it.
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The Fairy Faith (2000)
09/13/11, 20:31
I just loved it when the man told the kids sincerely that he saw faeries as a kid and adults lose the ability to see them, and the little girl responded, "Since the Tooth Fairy is real, maybe other faeries are real."
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Atheist Bill Maher OWNED by sharp Christian!
09/12/11, 18:39
Bill, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES!
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Deux Ex: Human Revolution 'Letitia the Trash Lady'
09/05/11, 22:20
Maybe I'm spoiled by Bioware, but I simply can't root for a protagonist who has a popped black collar on a designer Matrix black trenchcoat, permanently wears shades and hairgel, speaks like he's gargling rocks, and is a relentlessly stupid dick to everyone he meets.
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LifeChurch.TV: Satan's Sex Ed. Class
08/30/11, 22:26
It's in the same series as this classic:
http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=57239
What it'd love to see is God giving a counterpart lesson to this:
"So remember kids, no ejaculating unless it results in a baby, no gay stuff, and if you rape her, you have to marry her. Incest, concubines and child brides taken as prisoners of war are also fine. Any questions?"
"So do night emissions count?"
"Oh yeah, you're going to hell for that one. Next?"
"Why did you put a g-spot up men's butts?"
"I like to make the stuff that will resulting in your being tortured for eternity appealing. Same reason I created Satan and that talking snake. After all, I can't make it too easy, or heaven will be crowded with douchebags. Same reason that for most of your 6,000 year history, I only told a handful of desert nomads all the important stuff humans needed to know."
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Man does the Pentacostal Shimmy
08/23/11, 02:55
I totally respect these people's beliefs, and don't consider them in any way deluded. Because I am a good person who thinks it's important to have faith. As long as a lot of people believe it and act out its rituals it's something admirable, and definitely not a nightmarish psychosis indistinguishable from those suffering in mental wards.
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'Weird Al' Yankovic Goes Digital
08/23/11, 02:46
He got big in the 1980's playing the accordion to outdated songs. At what point do you think he was not deliberately anachronistic?
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Karl Pilkington vs 'A Down's Syndrome Kid'
08/21/11, 14:27
Listening to their older radio shows in which Karl was a producer rather than a character reveals Karl unmodified. He's not that different that Karl playing it up, just slightly more sensible, and the others spend more time poking fun of his homophobia.
The main difference is that on the later podcasts, when Karl tells a classic story, they pretend Karl's telling it for the first time and Karl acts a bit dumber than he did the first time around. For example, with earlier 'monkey news' it was either semi-plausible, or Karl claimed to be telling it because it's interesting, not asserting it's truth. Later he'd tell the same stories, but add a strange detail, and claim it's definitely true.
I've spent way too much time with their old shows on in the background. I still think 'Rockbusters' is the funniest bit they've done.
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Active Duty U.S.A.F. SSGT Daryn Moran: Obama's Constitutional Eligibility
08/18/11, 18:45
Skip everything up until 6:35 or so. Everything before that is just God blather.
"In identifying him [President Obama] as my enemy, and an enemy of the country, I squarely placed myself in the same situation as himself. Barack Obama and myself are looked at critically, asked questions, forced to think about our defense or reasons for things we've said or done. How I can handle it is part of the emphasis above: My trust in God. How he handles it: I'm concerned."
I really hope he's right. I hope that when asked questions and for reasons why he does things, the President actually "is forced to think", and doesn't just trust that God will make whatever thoughts or impulses pop into his head actually true.
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Lady quarrels with store security.
08/14/11, 17:56
My exclamation: "Sweet Zombie Jesus!" would suddenly be more appropriate.
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Proof that God hates country music
08/14/11, 17:20
Five people died, one may be permanently paralyzed, many more were seriously injured. And if I saw country music fans laughing at tragedy because it was a hip-hop fans that were hurt, I'd be pissed.
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Malcolm McDowell Struggles to say something positive about his newest film.
08/14/11, 04:20
Satan is not omnipotent, nor the creator of evil and death. They once again are confusing Satan with God.
Now a movie in which Malcolm McDowell plays Old Testament God being sued for entrapment by Eve and his resulting curse of original sin that brought death and disease into the world, would make for an interesting movie.
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The Slobstopper
08/14/11, 01:21
"Has this ever happened to you?"
No. Because I'm an adult. *click*
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Malcolm McDowell Struggles to say something positive about his newest film.
08/14/11, 01:18
"I'm sure he's not"
"...I'm sorry? You are certain that the small-time director, when promoting his low-budget movie in a press release, says that his clearly phoning-it-in actor gave one of the 'most convincing performances of all time', he was being completely objective? Is that the kind of stupid bullshit that just came out of your mouth?"
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Lady quarrels with store security.
08/13/11, 23:46
The subtitles seems to indicate the uploader is shocked that she was calling on Satan.
I wonder if, when corrected that she was actually rebuking Satan and calling upon Jesus, they'd respond "Oh, that's perfectly sane and normal behavior then."
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Soul Train Line Dance to Earth Wind Fire's Mighty Mighty
08/10/11, 18:04
It's easy to dress cool. It's much more impressive to turn ridiculous clothes into cool by sheer force of charisma.
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