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Lauritz Melchior

Suspension through: 0000-00-00
Take a little break, it will be fun.
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Comedian Obama's Boy Scouts of America Youth Squad
11/11/08, 01:29

That was hilarious throughout. It turned evil in the last five seconds.
Barack Obama Roasts Rahm Emanuel (2005)
11/11/08, 01:27

I didn't think that this was as good as the McCain roast, but the idea of Machiavelli's "The Prince" as a ballet is hilarious.
11/10/08, 23:33

Fruity bars!
'How big is the Whale?'
11/10/08, 23:32

Meant as a reply to Camonk. Oh well.
'How big is the Whale?'
11/10/08, 23:31

They need to be at least ... three times as big!
Furious Isle of Wight Organizer Berates 500,000 people
11/10/08, 23:27

And how!
Daniel Songer's peculiarly awful stand-up comedy (part 2)
11/10/08, 22:40

That was pretty painful.
Choking on a Joint
11/09/08, 23:43

I like how one of the linked videos just says "FAIL" in giant letters.
Are you addicted to porn?
11/09/08, 00:03

July 14, 1861
Camp Clar, Washington

My very dear Porn:

The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days-- perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more...

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause on which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution. And I am willing-- perfectly willing-- to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt - all of my joys except for you, Porn.

Porn, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me unresistibly on with all these chains to the battle field.

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them so long. And hard, hard is it for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and seen our sons grow up to the Honorable Reverend James Manhood. I have, I know, but few small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me--perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Mandingo, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not my dear Porn, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escaped me on the battle field, it will whisper your name. Forgive my many faults, and the pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have often times been. How gladly would I wash out with my seed every little spot upon your happiness...

But, O Porn, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you: in the gladdest days and in the darkest nights... always, always, and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath, as the cool air fans your throbbing [illegible], it shall be my spirit passing by. Porn do not mourn me dead, think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again.
Drunk men in suits vandalise a horse
11/08/08, 23:30

I waited so long for 2:13 to happen
Sarah Palin wants Americans to trust their media
11/08/08, 12:29

Ahhhh. She no longer inspires impotent rage in me. That feels good.
Jim Backus- Delicious
11/08/08, 10:32

I need to get me some of that champagne.
11/07/08, 23:55

11:55 PM :

The crotch licking has resumed, vague rumblings can be heard throughout the building and the camera seems to have shifted angles.
I Need A Plus Sized Woman Around The Clock
11/07/08, 13:13

Without having watched the video yet, I am nonetheless honor-bound to five-star it for making "geriatric butter demon" a working tag.
11/07/08, 13:11

1:11 PM:

Have discovered that what I previously thought a ball, is in fact another toy. Toy shaped like pumpkin.
11/07/08, 13:09

1:08 PM:

Puppies fight/play over ball. One chews toy.
Drew Barrymore and Bill Nye
11/07/08, 08:54

On the internets? Did they clog your tubes?
He Loves A Fat Girl
11/06/08, 23:10

Oh, and she looks like big bird in the thumbnail.
He Loves A Fat Girl
11/06/08, 23:07

I was led to believe that Fat Bottomed Girls would be featured!!!!

My expectations were fulfilled.
Raw Meat Family on Wife Swap
11/06/08, 22:01

Bravo, Tobias!

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