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Comments
Mark Gatiss shows us how to make Kensington Gore.
06/08/13, 22:46

...or you just wanted an excuse to cover people in chocolate syrup.

It's an honorable goal, but not if you're going to put up the pretense of making a film out of a sense of shame.
Airbending - Moving Wind with Mind and Spirit
06/08/13, 22:43

All I'm saying is that if truth had a vibration, someone would've turned it into a marital aid by now.
Airbending - Moving Wind with Mind and Spirit
06/08/13, 18:59

That's an amazingly long bit of text at the start to just say "I am scamming you, but I want you to believe it anyway."
A Cutscene From Final Zone II for the TurboGrafx
06/08/13, 04:47

At least it's nice to see that at least in a few games, men were given "armor" that pretty much left their stuffin's open to attack so their chesticles could be admired.

And was that a Samus cameo? She's looked better.
Fallout 3: Hidden Perk
06/07/13, 13:22

I think it's also possible to escape from the vault as a baby if you know what you're doing and play the game as such.
Abandoned Water Theme Park in the Mojave Desert
06/07/13, 13:20

I don't remember Mr. House sending me to this location. It'd probably be full of Fiends, anyway.
Fallout 3: Hidden Perk
06/07/13, 10:35

They leave it out because if they put it in, it'd make the hoo-hah over sex in Mass Effect look like a fight over favorite flavors of ice cream. Fox News would call it "a child murder simulator" and Bethesda execs would have to go take part in congressional hearings, etc.

I don't think gamers would freak, but those who are constantly looking to further their careers via outrage would have a field day.

That said, Fallout 1 and 2 handled it well. If you killed two or more kids (they gave you one freebie, which when you see how combat goes is understandable), you got the "childkiller" perk, and life became very difficult for your character:

http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Childkiller

It probably helped that the kids being killed were tiny pixel-figures rather than photorealistic and fully voiced characters.

And fuck Little Lamplight. It made no goddamn sense except that someone watched too many old episodes of Star Trek. Where were new kids coming from? Why can't an adult (or anyone) just blow up the gate with a mini-nuke and get in? How did the Enclave get into Vault 87, unless they went through LL, and if they did, why are the kids still alive?

I loves me some Fallout 3, but Little Lamplight was an idea that needed a lot more work to make sense.
Fallout 3: Hidden Perk
06/07/13, 01:34

Let me just put on my old Fallout 3 beard, here...

For starters, this isn't a hidden perk. It's the perk "cannibalism," which anyone can take.

Second, this is a mod that lets those with the perk eat a baby you find in the DLC, "The Pitt." The baby's a plot point in that she's immune to a form of mutation that's turning everyone in The Pitt into monsters called "Trogs." You can turn her over to one faction or join the one that currently has her.

It would have kind of fit with the game, but kids are indestructible in F3 and FNV since murdering kids is kind of frowned upon. It wasn't so bad when the game was a turn-based isometric affair in F1 and F2, but when it's an FPS, that might be a bit much.
HB6 CANADIAN MILF - AMOGGED
06/06/13, 21:31

Does Chris-Chan know about the PUA movement?

Would dropping him a line about his local chapter be considered evil, or just encouraging the inevitable?
Zoomies! Binoculars You Can Wear!
06/06/13, 19:14

Hunting?

For what? Where you left your gun? Or is this some kind of new hunting fad where you're supposed to tackle your target while wearing binoc-o-glasses?
A Scene from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure
06/06/13, 06:05

Robert Asprin's ghost is on line four, and he's very upset that you're stealing his schtick.
LUNCH WITH HB5's FROM WORK
06/06/13, 06:04

The problem with googling "HB5" is you get a lot of spark plugs and light bulb results.

I'm assuming "HB" means "hot babe" and the numbers 5-10 are the hotness rating of the rape target in question? I didn't see anything for HB4 or below, so I'm assuming this is like when the smallest drink you can order somewhere is a medium?
A Talking Pony!?! trailer
06/05/13, 11:19

They couldn't even smear peanut butter on its lips to make it "talk?"

And I thought the Hallmark channel was the only place still having movies where female leads were losing their ranches anymore.
Gun control is the REAL War on Women
06/05/13, 11:15

It's nice they can copy-paste their bullshit from the 1970's. It saves them from having to learn to spell.

And I'd love to see #1 somewhere. Mostly it's "three or more guys with a beer cooler who met for three weekends until they decided to just fuck it and go to the bar instead."
The 7th Voyage of Sinbad - Sinbad vs. Evil magician's animated skeleton.
06/05/13, 08:14

Scattering? You mean when someone tossed a bag of bones onto some rocks from just off-camera? It wasn't all that impressive and was the wrong angle/velocity for the fall.
Fluffle Puff Tales
06/05/13, 04:02

The pie residue is a metaphor for something, but I can't think of what...
Introducing the Domino's DomiCopter
06/05/13, 04:01

"Cor! Them cameras on lamp post kin fly now!"
The most awkward Norm MacDonald Interview of all time
06/05/13, 00:51

Is it Norm MacDonald week?

Is there enough desire for one? He lacks the charisma of an animated skeleton.
Norm MacDonald's Puppet Show
06/04/13, 22:13

I've come to the conclusion that Norm MacDonald is a "funny guy," not funny per se.

He can amuse, but not carry a whole production.
Introducing the Domino's DomiCopter
06/04/13, 20:43

Call Dominoes. Call friends who have black outfits and masks. You get pizza. They get free drone.

Win-win.

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