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poorwill

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Comments
SNES - Super Metroid
08/29/10, 01:21

I don't know. In the older games her clothes fall off when you:

*Get killed
* Beat the game really fast
*Enter a password
* In Zero Mission I think she takes them off and then just forgets to put it back on for some reason.

*In Smash Bros they fall off when she shoots a really big laser.

In Fusion they actually have to be surgically removed because ... I don't know.

Completely nonsensical and out of place emotional trauma doesn't seem like a real stretch, and Japanese game designers have always hated strong female characters.
Glenn Beck's Restoring Honor Rally 8/28
08/29/10, 00:33

I get 'Weightwatchers - Join now for $1*'.
SNES - Super Metroid
08/29/10, 00:31

All of that stuff is on the head of the director, Sakamoto, though - this is his vision, and it's pretty much expounding on Fusion's style. I blame Team Ninja for the hinky, plasticky graphics though.

The game seems like a long, earnest, creeeepy love letter from the creator to Metroid fans who are pretty much 'Thanks, but I don't like you in that way'. I've been spoiling myself for the parts I know will be painful to soften the blow when I play it - I've got it paid off in full.
SNES - Super Metroid
08/28/10, 23:47

A terrible cutscene from the new Metroid game (spoilers?):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkNVPWHaEPw

It is laughable that Samus would be so freaked out by the inevitable return of the easiest boss to kill in every Metroid game, but then I saw this speedrun and it looks like she doesn't deal very well with it in Super Metroid either.
Serial Killer Roguelike trailer
08/28/10, 22:37

FAKE

From the 'mastermind' behind this 'experiment':

"Oh hai /b/. On a scale of 1 to 10, what would you rate this troll as? Seriously, I think it's decently epic.

OMG I CAN HAZ SERIAL KILLER SIMULATION?

No. No you fucking cannot. But hey, I've given you guys a bunch of good ideas so yeah. Roll with it if you want.

Also, simmer the fuck down. I'm not taking your interweb details. I couldn't give a flying fuck on a starless night about what you do online. I haven't been hacked. I was actually expecting a massively negative response when I started this thing, which would have made the trolling much, much sweeter. Everyone fucking liked it though. Eh. Shows how much I know. Bit of a cock block to the overall enjoyment, but there you go.

Yes, you can use the video or any of the shit I threw out there as a basis for your own game. Make it look exactly the same as it does in the video if you want. Use the same name. I don't claim any copyrights on any of it.


So the game's a hoax that was made for lulz. It worked alright. Since it isn't an actual game, I'll keep the following for posterity. Hopefully, someone legit will make an actual serial killer roguelike game, and it will be awesome."


This is pretty much exactly how I would expect somebody who pretends to make computer games as an 'experiment' to write like.
Why the Blue Ranger left 'The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers'
08/28/10, 20:47

I am posting from the retard dimension.
Why the Blue Ranger left 'The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers'
08/28/10, 19:12

ugh, wrong thread.
Why the Blue Ranger left 'The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers'
08/28/10, 18:57

ohshit somebody already did the colour thing.

I think there actually is a power rangers thing in japan that has a flamboyantly gay rainbow ranger. It might even be on poetv.
Why the Blue Ranger left 'The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers'
08/28/10, 18:52

Christ people, it was a joke. It wasn't even an offensive joke! It would even be in keeping with how the made the yellow ranger asian and the black ranger black! I know it's Cena but still.
Money As Debt
08/28/10, 18:27

A barter system is very inefficient, but money as it is now is kind of a disaster. There have been several attempts to replicate the effects of a bartering system using liquid money. See 'Freigeld'. That, or something like that, would be better than what we have now, which is really fucked up and ironically anti-capitalist.
Laser Microscope
08/28/10, 18:04

This made me laugh.
Rat Takes A Bath!
08/26/10, 23:25

I have a small pack of rats living in my walls and ceiling right now. They frequently wake me up at night. I do not share your warm feelings towards this species.

The one in the video is cute though!
Against The Ninja
08/26/10, 17:15

Bravely rate and reviewed Caminante Nocturno.
Sharon Tate slowmo exercise on trampoline
08/21/10, 03:44

How could you do that ... to *that*? :(
Humboldt penguins chase a butterfly
08/20/10, 22:47

Yay!
Catherine Trailer
08/20/10, 08:34

Demon's Souls was published by Sony in Japan, so that was never gonna happen. Also, the 360 has more jrpgs than PS3 for some reason.
Post-Op sawed off thumb
08/16/10, 02:58

Sorry to hear about your thumb, RedHood. Hope it got better!
Supertrain
08/16/10, 01:06

The mantrain always wins, even if it comes in last.
On the Set of Atlas Shrugged: 53 Years in the Making
08/15/10, 22:50

I didn't kill any grubby ponytail-and-neckbeard-sporting douchebags with permanently cocked eyebrows in Bioshock. Just a bunch of zombies and little girls.
Supertrain
08/15/10, 21:56

There is a disco on that train. With an illuminated dance floor.

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