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Xenocide

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Comments
Conan; Jeff Lewis times his workers' bathroom breaks
08/04/11, 10:24

No, Jeff, Harvey Birdman is a cartoon. You're not supposed to look to it for business advice.
Mike Huckabee's 9/11 Cartoon for Kids.
08/03/11, 22:35

See, here's the problem. Different people have different definitions of unity.

For most of the country, it meant sharing our grief and our pain as a nation, it meant putting political horseshit aside and loving each other because we were human beings and that's what you do when a tragedy occurs. We were damn well united.

But there's a few people (and most of them have AM radio shows) who define unity as "everyone agreeing with us forever." So when it turned out that the attacks hadn't magically caused everyone to believe that war and tax cuts are the solution to all the world's problems, they declared that liberals had ruined unity, when in fact all we did was kill their pipe dream of a glorious far-right American hivemind.
Mike Huckabee's 9/11 Cartoon for Kids.
08/03/11, 22:26

So not only are we ignoring Obama's involvement in getting Bin Laudin, we're also implying that Saddam was a member of Al Quaida.

Funny how the only time conservatives are interested in education is when it involves straight-up lying to children.
The National Anthem by Double Dribble
08/03/11, 17:50

God bless Robot America!

This is actually damn impressive for a game that came out a quarter-century ago.
GTA IV car physics tomfoolery
08/03/11, 16:50

Well, in case you haven't noticed, the entire universe is fucking broken. But yes, I do want a hot dog.
Bill Murray sings the REAL Star Wars theme
08/03/11, 11:25

Star Wars

How 'bout those Star Wars

Hey look it's Star Wars

How about that


They're such bizarre wars

less fun than bar whores

but more fun than jar stores

who goes to those?


They're about a kid who's blond and lives on a moisture farm

and one day he meets these two wacky robots

And the robots just happen to have been built by his dad

Even though that's so unlikely it's insane


And then they threw in some muppets...


Solo

It's got Han Solo

He's a much better

Male lead than Luke


And Vader

is a big black guy

dressed like a samurai

who's all into goth (yes he is)


Now we're segueing out of the intro

and we're panning down we're panning down we're panning down we're panning down we're panning doooooown....




San Diego Comic-Confusion
08/03/11, 11:21

Holy shit, a clever and original convention video. The impossible has occurred.

But he missed a golden opportunity to call himself "Vito Jizz-waldi" and get himself in good with the porn industry.
Youth for Western Civlization
08/03/11, 07:16

I'd love to see this kid go to Europe and try to convince people there that the entire continent has a single shared culture. He'd be dismissed as a multiculturalist left-wing hippie.
Dude, you just got owned by Matt Damon
08/02/11, 16:53

Libertarians stole Matt Damon's hair and he is NOT having it.


There are people in the world who have never felt any real passion for anything. They do their jobs because someone hands them a check every two weeks, and it's never occurred to them that there are people for whom this isn't the case. People for whom the check isn't a motivation, it's almost some kind of small miracle, because with it comes the twice-monthly realization that someone is paying them to do this wonderful thing that they would gladly do for free.

But the "everyone works for the incentive" crowd has never cared about anything enough to experience that type of joy. So they assume it doesn't exist, that everyone, from actors to teachers to artists to scholars, is just doing it for the money. And that the people who devote their lives to educating the next generation should be regarded no differently than dogs doing tricks for pieces of meat.

Fuck.

Those.

People.
Obsessives: Pizza
08/02/11, 16:14

When I saw that guy's arm tattoos I thought for a second he had some sort of horrible fungus problem.
Obsessives: Pizza
08/02/11, 15:18

I'm not from an interesting city with its own secret shaolin pizza techniques, so I'm afraid I don't have the chops to enlist in your savage and unending pizza war.

You know what I like? When the cheese melts over the pepperoni.
I'm a Stupid Cat!
08/02/11, 10:43

This comment gets a Super Mario Galaxy full of stars.
Alex Jones - Justin Bieber Rant
08/02/11, 09:41

The new album from Justin Beebler:

"FUCK MAGELLAN"

Track listing:

1. Hand in Your Guns Girl (Oh yeah)

2. Baby I Love Your Police State

3. U Surrender (to the Freemasons)

4. Sugar Sugar (fet. DJ Lobotomized Sloth)

5. Mind Control Vaccinations Make Me Wanna Dance

6. B My Vassal 2 Nite

7. Football is Fake and I'm a Reptoid and so is Obama (Up In Da Club Mix)
Mitchell & Webb - The insulting librarian
08/02/11, 09:01

He took this job entirely so he could indulge his fetish for having sex with idiots.
I'm a Stupid Cat!
08/02/11, 06:03

This makes me envy cats even more than I already do.

Cat does a thing
08/01/11, 17:37

This is Russian, so the only logical conclusion is that the cat was momentarily possessed by Baba Yaga.
John Carter of Mars - Trailer
08/01/11, 16:50

It's "pre-punk." From the wild pioneer days of science fiction pulps, when there were no "punks" because sci-fi itself was novelty enough, and it did crazy shit like having a guy find a barbarian society on Mars where his enemies were green snake people with two torsos stacked on top of each other.

And this was okay with everybody, because folks back then remembered a time when cars and airplanes were considered just as ridiculous. So was it that farfetched to think that one day, we'd all be John Carter, stepping unto amazing new worlds where adventure and discovery awaited behind every red rock?

Good times.

Gay People Cannot Be Role Models
08/01/11, 12:24

Meanwhile, the people most likely to listen to this turd are also the most likely to be screwed over by his fear-exploiting backers.

Poetic justice? I honestly don't care anymore. Hate is always a tragedy.
Star Wars - Return of the Porn
08/01/11, 09:46

Oh boy, a Star Wars parody.
Gay People Cannot Be Role Models
08/01/11, 08:15

Our country won't be restored to moral righteousness until we look to biblical heroes as our role models. Good old offer-your-daughters-to-be-gang-raped-by-an-angry-mob biblical heroes.

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