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Xenocide

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Comments
Did Obama Murder Toot His Grandmother?
05/04/10, 14:29

SHE WAS CREMATED. That was the first suspicious sign.

Think about it: nobody ASKS to be cremated. Why would they? It hurts!
Atheists know God exists!
05/04/10, 14:14

In a nutshell: "Atheists are bad because they get laid more than me."

Also: Fun with video filters!
Anime Expo has really gone downhill.
05/04/10, 12:25

TOTALITARIAN DICTATORSHIP.

Hey, Anime Expo: Why all the human rights abuses?
The Errand Boy (1961) - Jerry Lewis' pantomime
05/04/10, 12:17

Professor Frink, Professor Frink
He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think
He likes to run, and then the thing with the....person?
Harvey Birdman - What exactly makes the Funky Phantom funky?
05/04/10, 12:13

Later, become the Phantom ditches solving mysteries in favor of more lucrative work. As shown in the video, he eventually gains tremendous influence by providing Antonin Scalia with the young mulatto boys he craves.
Australia's got talent - Watermelon man
05/02/10, 15:40

Australia's most dignified educator.
Ann McElhinney vs. Avatar
05/01/10, 22:42

"It doesn't matter if it's true! It's just not true!"

This turns from getting angry at a movie, to getting angry at teachers for having the audacity to teach things, and then ends in a sad old cat lady asking people to send her letters.

Also, Texas, Alaska and Australia have a combined population of zero.
Pamela's Prayer (Christian Anti-Kissing movie)
05/01/10, 13:37

"Well, sweetie, if your friend had only listened to her father and refused to kiss her boyfriend, she wouldn't have been raped to death by that gang of Mexican drug smugglers. Now let's put that behind us. Who's up for listening to me talk about your wedding night in creepy soft tones again?"
Jonah Hex (2010) trailer
05/01/10, 08:57

I'd been wondering how they were going to screw this up. It's such a great, simple concept in its original form, you just knew some douchebag exec was going to come along and poop on it.

The best part is how at no point in the trailer do his new superpowers appear to serve any useful purpose.
Jonah Hex (2010) trailer
05/01/10, 08:55

I like how every one-liner in this movie seems to basically boil down this way:

Bad guy: Gawrsh, y'all shore is uglah!

(Hex shoots him)

Hex: Now it is you who is ugly. And dead.
IBM 5100 Portable Computer Ad
05/01/10, 06:03

What's the only thing standing between America's cows and total chaos? This thing. Just listen to that inspiring music!
Patton Oswalt vs Shameless Joke Thief
05/01/10, 01:12

Oh, and here are Patton's thoughts on the whole thing:

http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=67077201&blogId=533643624
Patton Oswalt vs Shameless Joke Thief
05/01/10, 01:05

Madsen even sounds like he's reading someone else's work. His delivery is pitifully mechanical. He's amazingly outclassed.

Some comedians can't write a great joke, but they can deliver one so well that they'll get by on weak material. Some comedians can't deliver a joke, but their stuff is so funny that people won't mind. Madsen has shown he can do neither. Time to accept that management position at Wendy's, you hack.
Porn Stars Implore You to Buy Their Products
05/01/10, 00:55

YOU WOULDN'T MASTURBATE TO A CAR.
Smack you right in the Puss
04/30/10, 16:13

No. "Puss Smack" was a tag created for videos about cats on heroin.

Never has Intervention been so adorable.
Tim Minchin - Pope Song
04/30/10, 04:14

Flawless.
North Korean children tv program.
04/29/10, 18:34

It's just a gentle reminder of how good life is when you meet your government-mandated POETV star quota.

Of course, we all know what happens to those who don't. (shudder)
Xenosaga 3 - Ziggy confronts black testament
04/29/10, 17:12

It seems Ziggy anticipated Eric's plan to drown him in a kiddie pool.
Stan Lee officiates Spider-man's wedding
04/28/10, 18:20

JOE QUESADA HERE TO REMIND YOU THAT THIS CLIP NEVER HAPPENED.

WHY ARE YOU EVEN COMMENTING ON A CLIP THAT IS NOTHING BUT FIVE MINUTES OF DEAD AIR.
Important!! Urgent!! Warning From Jesus!!
04/28/10, 16:31

The Pizza Israel is soon!

Oh, neat. Jesus got us all dinner. Pizza Israel makes a quality pie, too. Just don't ask for pepperoni.

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