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StanleyPain

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Comments
Euro Truck Simulator 2: Giant Bomb Quick Look
02/16/13, 01:01

Whoa weird...I was literally coming here to submit this....creepy.
The Best Gamers - Anarchy Reigns
02/15/13, 18:44

I dunno...these guys were funnier when they actually made reviews that had a whiff of plausibility. It seems like lately they just blatantly make joke reviews that aren't even remotely straight enough to pass as parody and half the time they're laughing and losing their composure in the commentary itself. It's humorous, but it was way better when they were trolling better.
best view of russian meteorite so far
02/15/13, 13:36

I do know there's already a lot of Christian nuts saying this was a message from God, etc.... Not like anyone expected any different.
Pastor Stiffs One Waitress On Tip, Gets Another Waitress Fired
02/15/13, 02:41

I work in retail so, believe me, I am not defending the pastor, but you pretty much deserve to be fired if you post a picture of a customer's signature and last 4 digits of their credit card on the internet. I mean, this is like friending your boss on facebook and then posting about how much your boss is a tool; it's pretty much something that would get you fired anywhere, regardless of context.
This is what happens when you play Chivalry on a low-gravity server.
02/15/13, 02:35

YE OLDE REQUESTE OF THINE DUTY
Aliens: Colonial Marines - 'Gameplay' Demo vs. The Final product
02/14/13, 15:45

I honestly thought this game looked kinda cool from the E3 demos and figured it would be impossible to screw up, but god damn does it suck. It feels like something that would be borderline passable maybe in the last generation of consoles, but nowadays it's just mindblowing anyone thought it was cool to press this to disc and publish it. (except that bizarre, sloppy blow-job of a 9/10 EGM review which reads like some 12 year old hoping to get a tour of Gearbox's offices wrote it)

Oh, and be sure to read up on the game's storyline. I'm a huge alien fan and I was just going to sort of shrug away the fact that the Sulaco is still at LV-426 (despite the fact it departs for earth before Alien 3 begins) but be sure to read the extremely fucking retarded plot the writers came up with to try and excuse this away.

I won't go into it here so as not to spoil it for anyone, but holy shit.
Hi-Caliber - 'Hate Speech'
02/14/13, 14:34

Ah yes, the old "this isn't a democracy, it's a republic" gambit. The last, pathetic, tiny-dicked resort of an ignorant cracker who neither understands what the term "republic" means nor "democracy", nor how either one even relates to our own country. And of course, it's invoked as a not-so-veiled threat about right wingers should be allowed to forcibly deprive people of their right to free speech, all while whining about the erosion of "free speech" in this country.

Jesus, you have to almost admire that level of sheer fucking idiocy.
Hi-Caliber - 'Hate Speech'
02/14/13, 13:27

I updated my tags on "Patriotic People" so now the hi-caliber tag leads there...man this guy has gone downhill somewhat.
Cracked.com is the Lowest Form of Communication (State Propaganda)
02/13/13, 14:31

For those curious what this is in reference to, Cracked did an article "4 Unhealthy Mentalities that the Internet Turned Into Movements" and gangstalking was one there (along with men's rights types, cheaters who cheat with other cheaters, and drunk driving advocates (which was a new one on me))
Psycho Hamster
02/13/13, 13:57

THIS IS A VIDEO OF CIA/NSA PROBE HAMSTER SENT INTO MY APARTMENT ON 2/13/13 TO MONITOR MY THOUGHTS EARLIER IN THE DAY I HAD PASSED BY A BUS STOP AT WHICH 3 AGENTS MADE IT CLEAR I WAS UNDER SURVEILLANCE BY THE FACT THEY WERE ALL WEARING CLOTHES.....I AM DOCUMENTING THIS FOR LEGAL PURPOSES LATER IN THE EVENING THE HAMSTER DISAPPEARED AND, MOST LIKELY, WAS A DRONE/DROID SYSTEM OPERATED BY THE POLICE UNDER ORDERS FROM OFFICE R67 SECTOR 8 (KNOWN TO THOSE STILL IN THE MATRIX AS "WALGREEN'S DRUGSTORE") WILL CONTINUE TO MONITOR THE SITUATION
Rappin' for Jesus
02/13/13, 13:20

DAMN, HIS SCIENCE IS TOO TIGHT!
Creepy Gene (Monkees parody about Gene Rosen, the guy who sheltered kids after Sandy Hook shooting)
02/13/13, 13:19

RON PAUL 2016
Marco Rubio Takes A Drink During Republican Response
02/13/13, 11:54

*sigh* So THIS is the guy the GOP is all fluttery in the heart for to run for pres in 2016?
Home Depot, L.A. Terrorists Tactic: Deprive the TI of the Item You Want to Purchase
02/13/13, 11:42

This fills my head with hilarious visions of some "man in black" type rushing into a Lowe's, heading to an employee and, slightly out of breath, saying "I need to buy every single drywall screw you have."
Aliens: Colonial Marines
02/13/13, 03:34

I've watched some playthroughs online and it looks boring as fuck. Basically just a very limited, claustrophobic shooter designed in a very old-school fashion (in a bad way) where you go from point A to point B, pick up some shit, go to point C, do some event like defend a point for 30 seconds, move on, etc. It would probably be great if the graphics and atmosphere were spot on, but they're not. The graphics are embarassingly bad (I especially like the 2-D texture sprite for the acid "splat" when you shoot an alien) for something made with the Unreal engine, and the audio sounds like the Doom 2 Aliens WAD.
The dialog is all this dumb, forced military chatter bullshit similar to Call of Duty or something and, oddly, they got Lance Henriksen back to voice a Bishop droid that talks to over your intercom, AND another in-game character who's with you for most of the early parts of the game which is confusing as fuck since you never know which of them is talking to you. The multiplayer seems pretty fun but the maps are friggin awful which might explain why Gearbox is basically just going to launch the planned maps DLC now for free instead of waiting.
I am a Gamer
02/13/13, 00:08

IT'S PRONOUNCED "ANN EEE MAY", MOM!
Creepy Gene (Monkees parody about Gene Rosen, the guy who sheltered kids after Sandy Hook shooting)
02/12/13, 15:43

It's because these sorts of people would rather believe in unprovable nonsense rather than something you can actually get outraged about (or do something about) because it means they can still be lazy, internet-addicted dumbshits and pretend like they're "activists" by endlessly sharing PrisonPlanet articles or whatnot.
Warriors Of Virtue (full movie)
02/10/13, 20:09

This is yet another example of the pure shit that excellent Hong Kong filmmakers had to get involved in to stay in the film industry after the big migration away from China in the late 90s (due to the Hong Kong takeover). Ronnie Yu has made some great Chinese films....his American cinema consists of this and Bride of Chucky. Once HK's cinema opened up again his first film back was the excellent Fearless with Jet Li. But yeah it's amazing how many great Chinese filmmakers had to basically make crap for a few years in attempt to "break into" American cinema. (Tsui Hark had Double Trouble, John Woo did Hard Target and Broken Arrow, etc.)
Legend Of The Wolf Spirits Howl EPISODE 1
02/10/13, 17:54

I could be wrong, the video itself is not satire, but the account its on seems to present it as such.
MOUTH
02/10/13, 17:22

Sounds like a Nine Inch Nails cover version, which is worth stars on its own.

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