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Bort

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Comments
Nick Offerman pop locks
03/29/13, 23:07

Post the URL here and I'll give you phantom stars, which can be exchanged for phantom butt cream.
To Catch a Predator Beat-Off MegaLoad
03/29/13, 23:05

All I was saying is that there's a defense in there, I wasn't trying to excuse the attempted banging of a minor. "Dude, we were just role-playing. Look at her photo -- there's no way on earth she's really 13, I knew she was college age all along."
Strongman competition accident
03/29/13, 23:01

Not sure why I watched this -- was I expecting the class of "drops a huge stone ball on himself" where the guy wouldn't be injured? Apparently, on some idiot level, I was.
Winny Puhh: 'PEEGELPÕRAND'
03/29/13, 16:35

From the name of the band and the song, I was hoping they were Estonian for "Winnie the Pooh" and "Piglet's Song". Well, the band name is indeed the Estonian variant of "Winnie the Pooh", but "Peegelpõrand" means "Mirror Floor".

So it's the first day of kindergarten and little Johnny's mom advises him that he's a big boy now, and he can't use baby words any longer. Johnny nods his head and gets on the bus. He comes home that afternoon and his mom asks him how is day was. "It was fun, teacher read us a book!" "Oh, what book was it?" "Winnie the Shit."
To Catch a Predator Beat-Off MegaLoad
03/29/13, 11:54

About her passing for 13 ... she looks early 20s to me (and needs to take better care of her skin). I have to believe there's a defense in there somewhere.
Call of Dooty
03/29/13, 11:10

I don't know how to USE STRICMP YOU MONG!
Winny Puhh: 'PEEGELPÕRAND'
03/29/13, 01:20

Estonia's East Coast / West Coast rivalry has gotten way out of hand.

Also, Estonia gave us Sharky's crazy hot owner. Everything I know about Estonia is favorable.
Halloween prank goes horribly wrong
03/28/13, 12:50

"Are you going trick-or-treating?"

"No ..."

... most likely at the request of the emergency room.

I just noticed: Tyrone's fist connected even before the werewolf could finish his roar. With this guy around, who needs Buffy?
Call of Dooty
03/28/13, 12:22

PoeTV just broke my beautiful beautiful source code. I'll never write in C again.
Call of Dooty
03/28/13, 12:21

And if Doom had been done in the early 80s ... ? Presenting "Doom: The Text Adventure":

#include
#include

void main()
{
char string_in[256];
printf("DOOM: THE TEXT ADVENTURE\n\n");
while (1)
{
printf("You are standing in a large chamber. You see a demon ");
printf("flying toward you.\n ] ");
scanf("%s", string_in);
string_in[strlen(string_in)] = '##CONTENT##';
strupr(string_in);
if (strcmp(string_in, "FIRE") == 0)
printf("The demon falls to the ground and fades away.");
else printf("I don't know how to %s!", string_in);
printf("\n\n");
}
}
Rob Liefeld's Captain America mea culpa
03/28/13, 09:30

Back in the day, Liefeld showed potential; while his style was a little bit cartoony, it wasn't inordinately so. He had a sense of composition. He even drew feet.

http://sevenhells.blogspot.com/2006/03/future-aint-what-it-used-to-be.html

There are some people who claim that the inker was just fixing Liefeld's drawings, but we're not talking touch-up work; it would require a major overhaul of everything Liefeld did. Not just drawing a foot here or there, but doing a new layout of every page and then creating new art for every panel of every page.

My guess: Liefeld just happened to luck into a situation where he could call the shots, and without anyone pushing him towards quality, he got real lazy real fast. I won't criticize his commitment to deadlines and sheer volume of work, only that he took to drawing what was easy . He wouldn't be the first comic book artist who did his best work when he had to answer to other people; John Byrne's art got visibly lazy too (though not quite low quality) by the time he became a big name, and Frank Miller's art devolved into something we don't even have a word for.
Rob Liefeld lectures on character design.
03/28/13, 09:02

Syd has the best idea.
The complete Boxxy / John Holmes Thingee
03/27/13, 16:27

So ... Internet disaster waiting to happen that it's best to steer clear of? Will do.

When an antire Web site has sprung up to obsess about you, the only sane course of action is to stay the fuck away. That goes for all parties involved.
The complete Boxxy / John Holmes Thingee
03/27/13, 12:50

I don't like where they're going with the updated Cindy Lou Who.
sexi iced tea
03/26/13, 17:09

stars
sexi iced tea
03/26/13, 16:02

Fu Manchu's awkward teenage years
Conan the Barbarian - The Wheel of Pain
03/26/13, 09:54

This may be the only time anyone ever called Orson Welles a "twigboy".

(You should see "Citizen Kane", you might like it. While much of what it introduced, cinematography-wise, is old hat now, it still holds up as a study of a man who slowly let his good intentions be corrupted. A case could be made that his intentions weren't all that good in the first place, but I'll let you decide.)
So someone made a 23 minute long battle sequence between Star Fleet and the Cylon Armada
03/26/13, 08:30

THE DEFIANT WAS BUILT TO DESTROY BORG VESSELS AND ITS ABLATIVE ARMOR WOULD
SUPER CUBI 324-STEP JAPANESE PUZZLE BOX
03/25/13, 23:11

Someday, someone will teach him how to masturbate.
Moose Puzzle Box
03/25/13, 19:22

joke about getting into her box

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