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Bort

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Comments
YASKAWA BUSHIDO PROJECT / industrial robot vs sword master
06/06/15, 08:41

Oh goddammit science, NO. How can't you see what a bad idea this is?

Or do the robot cheetah guys actually have to attach a katana arm and set it loose before you begin to pay attention?
Punished for Masturbating
06/06/15, 04:18

Before you disrespect L 2 da P, it could happen to you cause it happened to me.


... I mean, him.
Terrifyingly massive wasp nest
06/05/15, 03:11

Flaming arrows and a driver ready to floor it.
Baby Goats in Pajamas
06/04/15, 15:20

Or if they were wearing overcoats.
Mike Huckabee 'jokes' about transgenders and bathrooms
06/04/15, 11:14

An entire political party that is predicated on being the shittiest people they can be, and people support them even if it means undermining their own interests.
Zoe Anderson's Facebook Pictures
06/04/15, 09:56

Hooker, when JHMF says that he doesn't want these videos to be about him, you know what he's trying to say as politely as he can? "Hooker, refrain from being an asshole just this once."
Zoe Anderson's Facebook Pictures
06/04/15, 07:02

This is the song that gets me:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMTKb-pgxGI

I remain astonished at the simple genius of guys like Warren Zevon, who can take a simple unadorned line like "keep me in your heart for a while" and elevate it to poetry. You could try very hard to be eloquent and never touch that.
Zoe Anderson's Facebook Pictures
06/04/15, 04:55

"i'd like to think that she'd hate this"

Perhaps she'd be amused that the second last photo is a killer with a knife?
Tiny hamster turns into giant monster
06/03/15, 16:05

The "Submit" button tempts youuuuuuu!
Buzz aldrin drunk at destination imagination global finals 2015
06/03/15, 14:11

The Ziploc bag can hang on a hook on the wall, so long as the wires dangle to ground level. That's not a problem.

I was also considering a frog on a lily pad, so it too can float if it needs to. I just don't want to set myself up where I can achieve maximum fun only if there is a ruinous disaster.

The dry basement obsession is mostly a lesson well learned; it's better to have alarms in place just in case. And this wouldn't be the first house I've lived in where water eventually started seeping in, so if I weren't on guard, it would mean I just haven't been paying attention.

Frau Bort's family isn't exactly known far and wide for good sense, and they come over a lot, so I feel I'm on constant patrol to keep my place in order. I'm apparently an affable host, but I'm also the person who has to tell adults not to give children piggyback rides up and down the stairs, and explain to children why they're not allowed on top of the garage. I remember being in first grade and they'd show us movies about the hazards of those sorts of behaviors, and even at seven I felt I was being talked down to.
Cleveland club basement flooded with Faygo after ICP show, 2011
06/03/15, 12:54

It's off-brand crappy soda.
Buzz aldrin drunk at destination imagination global finals 2015
06/03/15, 12:50

OW - I got a handle on my problems and it's all good these days. But there were people over this weekend, and someone brought a leaky beverage cooler and never took the ice out of it, so when the ice melted it left a slowly-growing puddle on the floor.

The water detector that responded was a Leak Squeak™, which works pretty well except for one design flaw: it can be used only once, after which you can't shut it off except by tearing it into pieces. Whereas my Ziploc baggie model makes noise while it detects water, and then shuts up when removed from water.

Simple common emitter circuit: the buzzer's connected to the collector, power goes to the buzzer and also to one of the water-detecting leads. The other water-detecting lead goes to a resistor which then goes to the base, so if water (or Faygo or pencil scribblings) happens to complete the path to the base, the transistor turns on and the buzzer sounds.
Cleveland club basement flooded with Faygo after ICP show, 2011
06/03/15, 09:18

The best possible Juggalo fluid this could be happening with.
Tiny hamster turns into giant monster
06/03/15, 06:33

NOT A DUPE:

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=72737
The Electric Chair (1969 Theatrical Trailer)
06/03/15, 06:17

Maybe he's just masturbating and that's what he shouts.
The Electric Chair (1969 Theatrical Trailer)
06/03/15, 06:16

In the original Italian release, the film was known as "Virtue, Human Society, Corruption, and the Moral Demand for Civil Disobedience".

Then it was dubbed for American audiences by a guy who only knew how to say "the electric chair" in English.
Buzz aldrin drunk at destination imagination global finals 2015
06/02/15, 22:13

Hey OW, I was thinking of you today. I needed to replace one of my basement water alarms, and I figured why not DIY it:

http://www.paprikash.com/lou/wateralarm.jpg

Transistor, resistor, battery, and a buzzer I ripped out of the old alarm. The yellow wires are for detecting water. The Ziploc bag is because I'm classy.

I am tempted to mount it in a tiny Viking ship, with the electrical contacts on the bottom of the hull. But that'd be tempting fate to let the water level get high enough for the ship to sail off.
Toy Cat Malfunction
06/02/15, 11:08

Yup, and I don't think C-Watches have been made since like the 20th century.

However, this being 2015, I bet I can just Google "Hulk picking his nose" and there's probably a video to tide me over. So it all works out.
Julia 'Zoe' Anderson Memorial
06/02/15, 10:42

"Nice video John. I still think you're a weird creep when it comes to young women, and I think anyone here would agree"

I wouldn't; "weird creep" is way overstating the case as I see it. When I see evidence of an older man trying to get somewhere with a young woman, that's when he becomes a creep. John doesn't go there as far as I can tell.

What I see more is people looking for an excuse to go after someone, and John will do.
Toy Cat Malfunction
06/02/15, 09:54

Fingers crossed! And now I totally want a Hulk C-Watch, but I can't find them.

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