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Desc:He loves this installment, and praises the Wii controls... yeeeaaah, you're not fooled are you?
Category:Video Games
Tags:zero punctuation, The LEgend of Zelda, skyward sword, plot holes, fellatio metaphors
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Comment count is 29
SteamPoweredKleenex - 2011-12-27
Nintendo truly is the king of dead horse beating. It should also probably give up on consoles for a while, make its games for the other, more robust systems, and keep the DS and other mobile gaming as its hardware focus for a while.

I have a Wii, as do a lot of my friends. I think everyone pretty much just plays Wii Sports, old Gamecube games, or uses it in conjunction with a Wii Fit. For current games, they turn to the XBox or PC.
Xenocide - 2011-12-27
I am continuously baffled by the internet's suggestion that Nintendo should stop making hardware. If there's one thing the last six years have taught us it's that Nintendo is just as good at hardware innovation as they are awful at software innovation. The Wii is by far the dominant sales winner of this generation and its competitors spent three years and countless millions developing ways to ape it.

For all that, there have been maybe two good Wii games released in the last year (three if you count Xenoblade) so it seems like the idea that Nintendo should abandon hardware and focus on software is a bit like saying Stephen Hawking should give up on physics to go work on his jump shot.

Dread Pirate Roberts - 2011-12-27
Five, for Xenocide channeling Yahtzee.

Adham Nu'man - 2011-12-27
The Wii doesn't sell hardware because it is innovative, it sells because it is cheap and gimmicky, and if you are a grandparent buying a gift for your grandson it is a cheaper option that also seems more harmless and family oriented.
According to your perspective Chia pets were "innovative".

Cena_mark - 2011-12-27
I'm not a huge gamer, but the Wii wasn't build with the future in mind. Nintendo was predicting just another 5 year console generation so they made the Wii weak, but they also made it to sell fast. The Xbox and PS3 with their powerful hardware combined with the shitty economy has increased the time of this console generation. So for now Nintendo Wii has stopped selling, and if they release the Wii U in a year they'll fail miserably because it'll be seen as a weird mid-gen console like the Sega 32x. People would rather wait another 2 years for the PS4 and the Xbox 720.

Xenocide - 2011-12-27
Six years later, the Wii hardware can still do things that the PS3 and Xbox simply can't do without expensive add-ons. Only in the game industry would a device with more functionality and possibility out of the box be dismissed as "cheap" because the visuals it produces are marginally less pretty.

Nintendo failed the Wii (and will probably fail the Wii U) on the software front, but the device itself is a fine piece of hardware.

SteamPoweredKleenex - 2011-12-27
If you mean the Wii can do motion control poorly, that is, indeed, something the other consoles can't do, even with expensive add-ons.

Well, maybe the PS3 can. I've never tried their "move" controller. The Kinect has the Wii beat (if you'll pardon the expression) hands down. And even if the Wiimote was as awesome a device as its adherents say, there are few games that have made it anything other than a gimmick, an unneeded hindrance to being able to effectively communicate your actions to the game.

Dread Pirate Roberts - 2011-12-27
You guys have heard that quote from their CEO in the mid-20th century, right?

"Nintendo is not a company that uses state of the art technology. Nintendo uses mature technology that can be applied and adapted for cheap production and solid performance."

Or something along those lines. They don't do state of the art. They do what works, cheaply.

sosage - 2011-12-27
Don't get it completely twisted. The Wii is utilizing Power Glove-era tech. The money MS/Sony dumped into motion control, at least for MS, was for tech that was much more reliable, expandable and robust.

It's cheap because it's cheap because it's cheap.

MS/Sony making better motion control *now* doesn't matter, however, because Nintendo got theirs on the gimmick. Money was in the bank with their shitty, cheaper version for years.

...and yes. Nintendo shouldn't stop making hardware. They consistently clean house in hardware sales, regardless of if that hardware is a complete turd. What everyone is (or should be) currently brain scratching over for their next gen machine is the DLC only future we are careening towards and how to design around it. In that race, Nintendo is really, really lacking.

Cena_mark - 2011-12-27
The Wii was made for everybody but gamers. Then of course they still do have legions of fanboys like Xenocide.

Riskbreaker - 2011-12-27
Even if you don't care about Mario, Zelda and other nintendo franchises, Nintendo, unlike other companies, still cares to make games, not interactive movies. What do real gamers play these days? Skyrim? I guess i don't get it because, so far this generation, i've liked like 2 or 3 games. I'm sick and tired of games full of cutscenes every 5 minutes (hello FF13) games where they keep telling you exactly what to do, and sandbox games where there is really nothing to do at all and the open space is there just to distract you from the abysmal main quest.

WitlessJ - 2011-12-27
The opening sequence begins with a shot of the Chicago Lakefront (the John Hancock Center can be seen in the center), then a shot of the Winslow home. In the opening titles, the main characters were shown around the Winslow home (though in some shots featured some characters in other places as well, such as Rachel at the Rachel's Place restaurant during the season two through four version, or Waldo at Vanderbilt High School hall during the season four through six version). The opening credits during the first three seasons feature a scene showing the Winslow family riding their bicycles across a bridge over the Chicago River; an allusion to parent series Perfect Strangers, which featured a scene of Balki and Larry (played by Bronson Pinchot and Mark Linn-Baker) riding a tour boat underneath the same bridge in its own opening credits from season three until the end of that series. Clips of episodes were shown after the bike scene and before the house shot in the season one through three versions. The house shown at the beginning and the end of the opening credits (as well as in establishing shots for scenes set at the Winslow house) is located at 1516 W. Wrightwood Avenue in Chicago, Illinois (41.92891N 87.666779W). The closing shot at the end of the credits with the Winslow family at the piano (which also was shown during the closing credits when there was no tag scene), in which the shot pans outside the house and the camera zooms out showing neighborhoods and the northside Chicago skyline (Wrigleyville) in the background, was originally used in the pilot episode "The Mama Who Came to Dinner" (though the scene featuring the Winslows before the pan was redone twice in seasons two and five). In season seven, the opening theme song and credits were dropped. The names of cast members, co-executive producers and executive producers were shown in the opening teaser for seasons seven through nine.

WitlessJ - 2011-12-27
The role of Richie as a baby was credited as being played by "Joseph Julius Wright" in season 1 (the duo was credited this way because the show's producers did not want audiences to know that Richie was then played by twins). Julius' name was made to appear as Joseph's middle name in the titles (the role of Richie as a baby was played by two children because California state law regulates the number of work hours for a young child, therefore it is common for the role of one baby in a TV or film production to be played by twins). Another Miller-Boyett production, Full House credited Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen in the same manner in its opening credits until its seventh season. In season five after Telma Hopkins left the show, Jaleel White was now given special billing in response to the popularity he earned as Steve Urkel. Appearing last in the credits, he was credited as "[and] Jaleel White as Steve Urkel" (Hopkins was credited similarly as "And Telma Hopkins as Rachel" prior to season five).

Dread Pirate Roberts - 2011-12-27
Nintendo needs to either come up with a new franchise, or learn to innovate the one's they have.

Shigeru brought us Mario, Donkey Kong, The Legend of Zelda, Star Fox, F-Zero.

In the 80s/90s.

Now it's time to reimagine what those franchises could be.... OR, better yet, create a few new franchises using the same formulas of fun, innovative gameplay mechanics and characters. And no, I don't mean motion gaming. I mean, they either find a way to not make gimmicky use of wiimotion, or realize that their 'fanboy' players probably are more willing to shell out the cash for a grand old button smasher.
Dread Pirate Roberts - 2011-12-27
They need to also focus on making a good console (ie, one that can compete), and then have stricter SDK restrictions so that we don't end up with 5 Million 'world poker' incarnations.

Mobile gaming is getting huge on smartphones. In ten years, the DS will be just another extra gadget people don't need to buy. They need to make sure they stay relevant in the console market. Computers lost the game wars, and now mobile gaming is going to lose out to smart phones. Staying relevant in the console industry is their best bet, if they pair it with my above 'get a new story to love' comment.

cognitivedissonance - 2011-12-27
Problem is that Nintendo's demographic is younger than the other two, and so they have to deal with the fact that Mom and Dad buy the games, not the player. So, they MUST use their well known franchises just to get games into the hands of their players, and make up the difference with merchandise. It doesn't help that they maintain the "family friendly" stance, but there are still plenty of people in the world to whom all video games are still "Nintendos".

WitlessJ - 2011-12-27
The show's original theme was the Louis Armstrong classic "What a Wonderful World"; it was scrapped after the first five episodes, though it was heard only in the pilot episode in syndicated reruns. The second theme "As Days Go By", written by Jesse Frederick, Bennett Salvay, and Scott Roeme, and performed by Frederick, was the theme for the majority of the series until 1995 (this was heard in season one episodes in ABC Family and syndicated airings). A longer version of "As Days Go By" can be heard in the first three seasons, though in syndicated reruns the short version is heard (in ABC Family airings, the long theme was used for all of the season one through three episodes).

Riskbreaker - 2011-12-27
While i'm no Zelda fan, suggesting Nintendo is wrong for beating a dead horse is amusing considering the whole vg industry is based on beating dead horses. Trying new things stopped being an option ever since this generation came out. The costs of making a game are excessive, now studios have hundreds of people making them, and because they need to be in shiny HD, and have multiplayer and what not a ton of money is wasted.

The result is: small studios dying almost every month, and big ass "triple A" titles not making a proper profit. At the end "gamers" don't want new things, they want more of the same. When new games with good ideas come out they go straight to the discount bin. Everyone wants more of the same, more Zeldas, more Call of Duty, more God of War. The vg industry became hollywood in other words, and the consumers are feeding this absurd model of making games way over budget.
SteamPoweredKleenex - 2011-12-27
Let's put it this way: Nintendo is beating horses that have been dead for far longer and for a greater length of time than most other studios without adding anything new to said dead horses. The movie industry may be into repeat performances with a little new stuff here and there, but Nintendo is getting to be like Lucasfilm.

Riskbreaker - 2011-12-27
Yeah, but Nintendo's dead horses sell well, and at the end that's the only thing that matters. Just like every new Sonic sells well, even if it's more furry fanfiction with lousy gameplay, or how every new God of War game sells even if it's the exact game as the first one.

sosage - 2011-12-27
You're not looking in the right places. Mobile game development and DLC is where most of the smaller efforts have moved to. The issue there is that even on the small and independent level you're going to get 9 ctrl-c'd hack unoriginal ideas to every 1 cool/good game.

It's not generational either. This industry has been all about copying the latest trend to death since pong.

...and Nintendo isn't immune to this criticism. It's just that you aren't allowed to be critical of them without a ton of people jumping in and making wild, polar statements to the contrary.

...and I haven't enjoyed a Zelda game since the original. It's long come off as pandering to a fan base that won't let good things be good in their moment. That moment was the NES.

WitlessJ - 2011-12-27
Family Matters was created by William Bickley and Michael Warren (who also wrote for, and were producers of parent series Perfect Strangers) and developed by Thomas L. Miller and Robert L. Boyett (also producers of Perfect Strangers), it was also executive produced by Bickley, Warren, Miller and Boyett. The series was produced by Miller-Boyett Productions, in association with Lorimar Television who co-produced the show until 1993, when Warner Bros. Television absorbed Lorimar (a sister company under the Time Warner banner). Starting with season three, the series was also produced by Bickley-Warren Productions.
The series was filmed in front of a live studio audience; the Lorimar-produced episodes were shot at Lorimar Studios (later Sony Pictures Studios) in Culver City, California, while the Warner Bros.-produced episodes were filmed at Warner Bros. Studios in nearby Burbank.

Riskbreaker - 2011-12-27
Ah yes, that's for sure, Japan's industry right now is more or less in handhelds too. Budgets are smaller, earnings are bigger, as simple as that.

I don't say nintendo is immune to anything, quite the opposite, as i said, a lot of companies are in the same boat, the "beat a horse to death" thing. But the criticism from the vg media is not equal at all, and when it comes to reviews it becomes a mess, because every single new Zelda, Uncharted, COD and what not gets either a 9 or 10, and i remember how, say, Yakuza 4, got 7s and 8s because some were complaining it was more of the same. There's just no logic going on behind these reviews.
Riskbreaker - 2011-12-27
That was suppose to be a reply to sosage, derp. In short: this generation sucks, get off my lawn!

twinkieafternoon - 2011-12-27
Witless J is doing God's work.
MrBuddy - 2011-12-28
You get the stars for shortest comment.

FABIO - 2011-12-28
Nintendo is going to be royally fucked in a few years.

The Wii was a simple gimmick that people who didn't normally play games could get into.

None of these people are going to be lining up for Wii U touchpad controllers.

So what has Nintendo traditionally fallen back on when their console is a turkey? Their portable system. Gameboy and DS kept them alive during the N64 and Gamecube years.

Oops, except now smartphones have taken over the portable market. Who is going to pay for a crappy 3DS2 game on a 0 handheld when they could pay -10 for a crappy game on a smartphone they already owned?
Sundry - 2011-12-29
Kids. Kids who like the toys that Nintendo makes. There happen to be many of those kids, imagine that.

These 5 stars are for WitlessJ.

pathetique - 2011-12-28
I love my Wii and I loved Skyward Sword.

That said, five stars because Yahtzee is hilarious, and also because Fi is totally awful.
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