Otherwise known as "the Saturday morning cartoon you had to suffer through because Ghostbusters was on right after."
Marijuana is literally the only thing in their world that is not named after a rock. Of course they'd be drawn to it. It feels so tantalizingly out of place.
Also, why is weed on the Flintstones just a plant that you smoke? I was expecting a wise-cracking bird who flies out of a bong and hits you on the head with a cartoon mallet so you act all funny.
So what happened to all the black people in Bedrock?
My theory: The Flintstones actually takes place in a post-apocolyptic dystopia, as evidenced by the assumption that there are so few people around, and Fred is essentially betrothed to Wilma in their pre-adolescences. Also, this explains why they know more about the technology of the immediate past as children than they do as adults, as the civilization has already started to forget the luxuries that rapidly decrease in importance as the generation that remembers them dies out. This means that the Jetsons likely perished in a horrifying cataclysm of their own making.
The Jetsons and The Flintstones took place at the same time. The Jetsons' world was made possible by an underpaid working class, who toiled in such extreme poverty that their lives may have seemed like they were taking place millenia in the past.
This is why you never saw what was on the ground on The Jetsons.
But then how do you explain the fact that the Jetsons had to use a time machine in order to visit the Flintstones?
Was the time travel angle just a convenient lie fed to us by NWO-loving TV execs who wanted to conceal The Truth from us kids?
The "time machine" was really nothing more than a simple teleporter device which allowed travel from the ground to the sky cities. George and Fred were both unaware of this, and the entire episode was a corporate scheme to make the underclass fearful of ever rising above their station.
Sir, if you could produce those walls of text, I would gladly read them.
Thundarr the Barbarian is the missing link in the timeline between The Jetsons and Flintsone Kids. Bam Bam is Thundarr's long lost great-grandson.
Not that it matters much but wasn't this really more 80's fault than 90's?
This episode, possible origin of "stoner".
Also thankful for my age allowing me to avoid this and many other bad cartoons in the late 80's.
|Hugo Gorilla |
Was it too much to ask that Stoney have a monkey riding on his back and have a scene where the monkey looks at his camera, shrugs his shoulders, and says, "It's a living!"
|Oscar Wildcat |
Few things say 80's like Nancy Reagan wanting you to quit drugs so you can have healthy clean fun with Michael Jackson.
Is Clyde from Maine?
Special thanks to: Michael Jackson
"JUST SAY NO" performed by: LaToya Jackson
mj was too busy snorting crushed up oxycodone off toddler penis to make it to the flintstone kids recording session i suppose. a pensive mj, reclining on his solid gold sega g-loc cabinet, attended to by shirtless vietnamese boys, would later recall that this was the catalyst for his long decline in the nineties.
|Caminante Nocturno |
1. Either Dino must have a very long lifespan, or Fred named every 'dog' he had Dino, in which case the Dino in this cartoon is long dead by the time the original took place.
2. The black kid and the Asian girl are the only ones wearing shoes. Why?
2. Rich parents (basketball player and computer scientist, probably). Which would also explain why there are no blacks or Asians in the Flintstones; by the time everyone grew up, the black kid and Asian girl had moved to the Jetson's floating city.
Or they'd been murdered in an angry proletarian uprising.
|American Standard |
So Fred is the kind of asshole who would spend a week in London and come home talking about lorries, lifts and emphasizing everything with "bloody?" ? I thought better of you, Flintstone.
"My cool cousin from california doesn't do drugs!"
"Yeah, let's all do what Fred's imaginary cool cousn did!"
Oh, and Flinstones Jackson is lily white. What the fuck.
What was with all the "kid" versions of cartoons in the 90s? The Flintstone Kids, Tom & Jerry Kids, Muppet Babies, Little Rosie, Baby Looneytoons, Etc.
Also, I love how they shoehorned in the token black kid, and naturally, he's the brainy smart one of the group.
Oh, and in the second part they really get edgy for an ultra-PC 90s cartoon, when "Stoney" reads his tablet upside down and thinks it's written in Japanese.
And the ending reveals to us what an anime incarnation of Michael Jackson looks like. I wonder if that's really him singing? I can't tell.
Jesus why did I watch this whole thing? I need to rest.
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