|Jet Bin Fever |
If Stephen Douglas hadn't suplexed Lincoln, the Civil War may never have happened.
Never would have happened. Lincoln was tall, strong, and a wrestler.
He has one other thing in common with these fellas too. He was gay.
That's right, Cena. Wrestling is gay.
The best seven minute summary of the Bush era I've ever seen.
This makes me feel stupid for even supporting the war at anytime.
The bad guy is the one who uses big words when he talks. The good guy is the one who shouts louder.
"Throughout my career, I've wrestled a lot of countries."
That puts a funny picture in my head. What countries did he wrestle, and how do you wrestle a country? Either way it sounds pretty damn awesome.
Ironic interest in pro wrestling is more boring than anything happening in Williamsburg.
That's why you need to cultivate an unironic interest in wrestling, hipster.
My love of wrestling is un-ironic. As I'm sure it is for others here as well. I know it has its stupid moments like this, but I still love it.
precisely what kids in Williamsburg say about italodisco.
i will fully attest to being "irony-damaged," (as it is said by people who have absolutely 0% chance of not being irony-damaged themselves, by merely having any urge to combine those two words), but I'd like to think my love of wrestling is one of my more earnest interests.
certainly, there are is a glut of humiliating, unwatchable stuff around what I enjoy about pro wrestling, but you can say that about any medium. it just so happens this particular medium has been monopolized to near oblivion, which makes the perspective presented in between matches both monolithic and excruciatingly self-indulgent.
Still, I never doubt that there are things that legitimately get me excited and keep me coming back through all the Katie Vicks and Tough Enoughs. Things that I know might just sound like huff-and-puff to people who never grew up on the stuff, can't get into the pace, or just can't reconcile personal experiences with the WWE's many instances of hate speech.
But there are things. The universal, non-verbal language of the in-ring story, watching strong-willed athletes with impossible dreams go from almost breaking their neck in front of 8 people in a high school gym to performing to tens of thousands, the mastery of momentum present in the wrestling match which most mainstream Hollywood directors can't even touch... It keeps me coming back, no matter how hard Dixie Carter and Vince McMahon try to push people away.
tl,dr: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE
***** You get my stars Corn. No shame here. There are far more shameful things to like, like My Little Pony.
A long time ago i decided that i would watch sports that actually entertained me instead of boring me to tears. Wrestling can be entertaining, and even when it's being cringe-worthy you can have fun with it. It's as simple as that, there's nothing "ironic" about wanting to have fun.
This broke the "pro wrestling embarrassment barrier", a bar everyone thought was already set at its maximum.
Fast Forward 9 years and half that audience is saying, "Ron Paul wants to get us out of Iraq! Ron Paul 2012!"
They sure know their audience.
Forget stories of enlarged hearts, personality disorders and 'roid rage - Steiner's freakish body is the single greatest deterrent against using them. Even his muscles have muscles.
Chris Nowinski has worked since ending his wrestling career to educate young wrestlers on the dangers of concussions and the foolishness of the "I'll work through it" mentality in general. He's attempted to make concussions more widely reported in wrestling and football, and to make concussions more thoroughly monitored during wrestling and football. He also partnered with some university (I forget which) to study deceased wrestlers' brains and to see if there was any correlation to chair-shots, suplexes, and other dangerous moves and the deterioration of the brain over time (there was).
Naturally, most people in wrestling (including many wrestlers) despise him.
Wasn't Chris Benoit's brain in pretty bad shape when they made his autopsy. Like, he had the brain of an 80 year old alzheimer man if i recall correctly. WWE has, as far as i know, banned chair hits in the head ever since the Benoit incident. There's also of course Misawa's case, the acumulation of injuries killed him. Taking so many risky moves over the years is going to fuck you up no matter what.
|Wonko the Sane |
insta 1 for shit
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