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Desc:The whoring of the Dr. Suess estate continues.
Category:Advertisements, Horror
Tags:the, dr., lorax,, suess,, mazda,
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Comment count is 37
Fucking seriously?!
Wonko the Sane
seriously fucked

Feariously Sucks

My boyfriend got all mad that IHOP has green eggs and ham as a Lorax tie-in. "That's not the Lorax! That's Sam I Am!

And 5 stars for Hollywood spitting on the corpse of Dr. Suess. After they already raped it with the Grinch.
stars dammit

Dr. Suess rejected most adaption attempts of his work (aside from the Chuck Jones animated specials) throughout his lifetime. Then as soon as he died, his widow began giving away the farm and approving terrible adaptions left and right. She's 91 years old at this point, so maybe she's gone senile, or maybe she's a horrible greedy bitch. You'd have to be one or the other to sign off on Mike Myers playing the Cat in the Hat.

I mean, Hollywood was founded by organized crime, robber barons and pederasts, so should it really be a surprise that they rape and pillage anything they can get their hands on?

The Mothership
I never read the Lorax books, but this is hideous.
books? you are retarded.

The Mothership
ignorant, the word is ignorant, sweetie.

Retarded, sweetie.

The Mothership
sweetie, fetch mummy's wineglass.

Coming soon:

Horton Hears That Romney's Environment Policy is Actually Quite Reasonable While Promoting Optimal Business Growth
They need attach a turbine to Dr. Seues' grave. His spinning should generate clean energy for generations to come.

This version of the Lorax is an hour and a half of people thanking the Once-ler for being a job creator.
Binro the Heretic
Stars for evil.

The good news is that they've released the original Chuck Jones animated TV special on disc. Grab that one instead of going to see this one.
HAHAHA tim & eric.
For once, they were right about something.

Fuck Me Jesus on a Pogo Stick, this is evil!

Sudan no1
Tim and Eric are always right, half of POEtv is just to blind to see it.

fuck this
I hope this inspires a whole generation to start so many fires in corporate offices that a telescope like the Hubble would be able to see it from Arcturus.
Jet Bin Fever
This ad targets the most ill-informed, unsophisticated environmental people ever.
If we say "SKYACTIVE TECHNOLOGY" enough times, maybe no one will notice that it's a completely meaningless buzzword.

The new Mazda also includes Blast Processing.
Don't insult Blast Processing. Its what allowed Sonic to move so fast. Mario couldn't keep up, because the SNES lacked a blast processor.

Translational steering is what I look for in a car.

MC Scared of Bees
One star worth of anger, four stars worth of sadness. Shit.
Oscar Wildcat
The youtube comments are an tsunami of hatred and loathing. One might think that the sociopaths over at mazda might take the hint and not run this ad, but who are we kidding?
Koda Maja
I do like the planet, please don't get me wrong
but I must get to work, and the journey is long.

Bikes are for hipsters, you know this is true,
and the bus is for poor people. That will not do.

So too bad for the planet, I'll continue to drive
my bright shiny new car: Mazda CX-5
5 for this comment.

You can't tell, but I'm clapping.

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Oh my god, this has got to be some kind of high-level satire, or something.

Right up there with the old "'Schindler's List'! Brought to you by GERMANY, LAND OF AT LEAST A DOZEN UNIQUE WORDS FOR EXACTLY HOW WRONG THIS IS" ad campaign.
The bird-pajama-dudes from the Butter Battle Book say "BE ALL YOU CAN BE, IN THE ARMY!"
Capitalism, ladies and gentlemen.

Holy shit, I thought the title was exaggerating.
I'd like to imagine that it was Frank Reynolds whoring out his voice for this shit, rather than DeVito himself.
That guy
Memory-foam noose, brought to you by The Giving Tree.
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