Konversekid 
"I'm sorry sir, the last bit of Jesus was sold a long time ago."
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Lef
The crazy eyes at the end make it for me.
He looks like the kind of fundie who tries to convert poor victims on their bus-ride home.
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IrishWhiskey
Because as Jesus said to the money-lenders in the Temple:
"It is easier to get a camel through the eye of a needle, than it is to pass up my great selection of merchandise. For when you pray, do not go into your room and close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Instead make sure to bling that shit out on your clothing and cars. Just like your local radio station, I reward people wearing my logo. Remember, if you ever see a store or government institution not selling my stuff, complain until they do."
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jangbones
this guy is very oppressed
I feel bad for him
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Rodents of Unusual Size
But the Easter bunny is so much more magical.
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Hugo Gorilla
You would think Christians this passionate about their faith would be glad Jesus isn't on the shelves sharing space with gaudy, cheap plastic bunny baubles and other mass produced junk. He's probably making a point about how the true meaning of Easter is being lost due to the commercialism of the holiday but i rather think of him as one of these nimrods who probably spout off about the war on Christmas, too.
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B. Weed I get the feeling that a lot of "War on Christmas" types are lazy/hypocritical/[insulting adjective of choice] enough to only throw a big hissy-fit on Christmas (which often makes the news) but actually don't seem to give much of a damn about Easter (which is strange because you'd think it, and Good Friday, would be much more important from a theological standpoint).
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American Standard
Back when I was a cashier, it's people like this I made a point of telling "Happy Holidays!" in December.
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chumbucket
He didn't preorder
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Jet Bin Fever
Sorry buddy, but keep your Jesus out of our pagan holidays!
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they'reforyou
Aisles and aisles, you say? I'll wager you three Hispanic grocery stores full of St. Mary candle stands that you're in a Wal-Mart, which according to their Borg Algorithm has at most two aisles of dedicated Easter Bunny paraphernalia. If you want to get your Jesus on, go to the entertainment section, which will have, in the very least, several copies of the KJV, NKJV, and NIV, as well as The Passion of the Christ and the Greatest Story Ever Told on DVD, several Amish romance novels, even more crazy evangelical LIVE A GODLY LIFE manuals, and as an added bonus, you can pick up some grape juice/wine and matzo crackers. Walmart is a dedicated Jesus-needs warehouse 24-7, 365 days a year.
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snothouse
YEAH, WHERE'S MY CRUCIFIX JUMP ROPE?
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TeenerTot
Go to a xtian book/gift store for your jesus needs. Dooosh.
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cognitivedissonance The irony here is that 400 years ago, his sect settled the notion of Jesus being a literal consumer product, and now they want it back again.
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Robin Kestrel
WHERE'S JESUS?
Found Him! He was behind the sofa the whole time.
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That guy
He ROSE from the dead.
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Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Chocolate Jesus.
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kingarthur
Jesus is the real meaning of a left over Roman fertility ritual?
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spikestoyiu
Yeah, he rose from the dead, but is he able to deliver tons of candy to millions of households in one night, year after year? All while lacking any sort of serious grip strength? Which one's more impressive?
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