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Desc:Usefull instructions from a weapons expert.
Category:General Station, Stunts
Tags:fat, katana, burglar, defense, defend
Submitted:magnesium
Date:05/13/12
Views:1565
Rating:
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Comment count is 31
duck&cover
I guess he should fear ham-burglars.
TimidAres
I dont know what a "bugla" is, but Im glad I now know how to defend myself from one.
And knowing is half the battle!
Corpus Delectable
Needs fatswordsman tag
Enjoy
Why are Katanese generally obese? Doesn't the skinny guy need protection more?

Corpus Delectable
Seriously, the "defend" tag needs to die in a fire, since "defense" is already linked, and the manifoldly and splendiforously linked "fatswordman" tag needs to replace it.

This video deserves its place in the oeuvre.

Jet Bin Fever
"Bugglers Beware!"
The Mothership
Now I know how to be the most badass burglar ever.

extra star for the big kick.
Scrotum H. Vainglorious
God I love this.
Caminante Nocturno
Let's be honest, a burglar isn't going to find anything to steal in his home.
MacGyver Style Bomb
As a utility worker, I see a few of those "There is nothing in here worth your life" window stickers. Thanks to the conditions of such places, you can honestly say that there's nothing inside worth your *time*.

Callamon
How old is he 16ish 32ish ? Also needs the Heavy Breathing tag.
catpenis27
I saw that preview, and read it as "katana vs BURGER". I knew who it was by the preview, and I'm sticking with burger.
catpenis27
Also every time I see this I think of some lines from a movie: "I carry a knife for protection", next person says "People who carry knives get shot."

SteamPoweredKleenex
It's similar to how people who think shotguns, rifles, and other "manlier" firearms are somehow a good idea in close quarters.

Though unless you've got a bayonet mounted on one, swinging it isn't as big an issue as Captain Katana's brand of idiocy.

SixDigitDebt
Where's the neckbeard tag, you heretic?
magnesium
It's really more of a double-chin beard.

misterbuns
A delicious selection from the comments:

have u ever killed someone who is truing to break into ur house ?

RichieBees 1 day ago

Never killed anyone, but someone tried mugging me once in Riverside Park in NYC, I used my weight to rip a branch off a tree and proceeded to take the guy apart.

bbillyk in reply to RichieBees 1 day ago
fedex
JUST (HUFF) STAY THERE..FOR...FOR A SEC...WHILE I (HUFF) BREAK OFF (PUFF) THIS BRANCH (WHEEEZE) ...OK?...OK?...(HUFF) JUST (WHEEEEZE) STAY (PUFF) THERE....OK?

almost got it

misterbuns
"With your master technique why not simply slice the bullet is half with superior, one thousand time folded steel?

bsmit208 "
SteamPoweredKleenex
From the description:

"None of these techniques are foolproof, and the best thing to do would be to simply not be seen."

I find this a lot like the Goodyear Blimp offering lessons on how to be a stealth bomber.

BHWW
Please, this is so lame.

A Tactical wazikashi would work much better.
Hank Friendly
Maybe its the fact that this guy somewhat resembles me if I was 100 pounds fatter, or the possibility that had I not made the choices I did in life, this very well could have been me (in as much as that is possible), but I think he is a shining beacon of hope in the eternal morass of darkness that is the internet. Full aware of the ridiculousness of his situation, he drives on, unafraid, almost recklessly, towards glory. I salute you fatswordsman.
fourthguy
None of these techniques are frooproof. Good to know.
badideasinaction
I voted this up the the hopper because of the wonderful slight pause at 4:27 where he thinks his cunning plan through.
badideasinaction
"up in the hopper"

Fuck, I need to sleep.

fedex
well, you know, MOST guns would be able to fire through a door...yes, so...it's a good thing you will enver encounter anything more dangerous than a Nerf gun I suppose

Aelric
Just hangin' out.
Redford
One of the popular panels at naka is the panel where the guy actually trained in era-appropriate katana technique shows a bunch of people how a sword would be used to chop your torso in half. It's pretty enjoyable every single year.
SteamPoweredKleenex
Does the audience get to choose which weeabo gets bisected, or does the panel host bring their own human sacrifices?

garcet71283
Filmed by mom.
hammsangwich
Bowglore, bugla, bugguler, borger, burger. This guy needs to tighten up his jowls.
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