I'm going to join one of these groups.
Oh yeah, and the NRA.
Ah, the great human bird feeder. It's good to be a squirrel.
|Corpus Delectable |
I wonder on what they're going to pour all that salad dressing?
Or maybe it's just for hydration?
God bless your Southern innocence. Never learn the answer.
You can make a salad from many common suburban weeds. Dandelions, clovers, chickweed... too bad most suburbanites poison them.
Unrelated, but i'm BEREFT since peterprepper got all his episodes banned.. where the hell can i find them
I always got the sense that if you have invested in a fallout shelter and the supplies necessary to stockpile for the great global catastrophie of 2012, you cannot afford not to root for the end of the world. I mean these guys must be DYING for the world to end at this point.
It's like having a warehouse of tequila and cocaine for the most insane Cinco de Mayo party ever and having a council of cool-headed ninnies decide to skip the first year after year, for safety concerns.
Not to get political, but the people who are upset with the system on the Right seem to be obsessed with catastrophe and living in the action movie of their dreams, where as the lefties are building community gardens in ghettos so that people know how to grow their own food when the agricultural system of liquidation finally collapses.
Not only is this a right vs. left thing, but also Urban vs Suburban. People in the suburbs lack the sense of community many urban communities have. They might live 10 yards from the next house over, but they might as well be a mile away. These are people who shop at wallmart and worship in the mega-church; surrounded by people yet so distant.
I've sold some raised bed farms to conservative Christian groups who are preaching it along survivalist lines to their flock, but I think it's most likely just a tax write-off.
"They should have just joined the Coast Guard instead."
I see what you did there, my dear troll.
If he joined he'd be a natural store keeper.
|Sudan no1 |
I might not survive the upcoming solar-flare-earthquakepocalypse, but at least I won't have to eat ritz with salad dressing while waiting to die.
|Binro the Heretic |
This almost makes me ashamed that we have a small food stockpile for hurricane season. Contrary to popular belief, canned food doesn't have a lengthy shelf life. Most will last only a year, though some stuff is safe after two years. When the season ends, we have to eat our stockpile and/or quickly donate it to food banks. When the next season rolls around, we have to buy all new stuff.
Do these guys do that or are they just hoping this stuff will keep longer?
Similarly, some of my friends are aware of the whole "doomsday prepper" movement and ridicule me for having a week's worth of drystuffs. I live in Oklahoma. A flood or a tornado can and will knock out infrastructure for a good week, easy. I was without electricity for four days, which is just long enough for all of your food to go bad even if you quickly pack it into a cooler. Now I keep about a dozen cans of meat, chili/soup, and vegetables, and suddenly I'm lumped in with these guys.
If an apocalypse happens, word will get out and these guys will be raided first. Guaranteed. If Fallout has taught me anything, stockpiles are targets, and it's best to put your points into sneak early on so you can nab everything that isn't nailed down and trade it for food.
I once helped a friend of mine clean out a house for an estate liquidator. The person who owned the place had built a shelter in his basement at some point during the Y2K scare.
Batteries of various sizes and voltages, a majority of them leaking acid. Gallon jugs of water with particles of sediment in the bottom (the guy filled them himself with household tap, since none of them were sealed). Packages of ramen soup bloated like balloons. Cans of food with a healthy tinge of rust on all of them.
Just so you know, this was in 2002/2003, giving you an idea of the very brief shelf life of food and supply stockpiles. Then again, the basement itself wasn't very well maintained either.
Most of that shit is going to expire within a year, and unless they keep pretty good records, they're going to be eating a lot of disgusting crap if something ever does happen.
Even if they do keep very good records and are careful to use as much as they can before it expires, there's going to be a lot of waste involved in most of the non-canned items - and there weren't that many canned items.
I hope they like stale macaroni and cheese with their expired ranch dressing. Hey, they can even wash it down with plastic-tastic water or a nice cup of lumpy mold-ridden ketchup.
These fuckers better donate this shit to a homeless shelter. Their end of the world has already come and these dicks are buying a convenience store's worth of food so they can never eat it.
These "preppers" that stockpile food for the Obamapocalypse are just extreme couponers with guns.
If they really were serious about surviving some moronic fantasy end-of-the-world scenario they'd be training to become triathletes that are really good with handguns, not buying twenty gallons of ranch dressing.
Speaking of the Obamapocalypse, I find it both amusing and despair-inducing to see all the right-wingers buying up guns and ammo 'cuz they a-feared that Obama-secret-muslim-socialist-nazi is a-fixin' to cum 'n' take 'way all their bang-bang shootin' irons if'n he cheats 'n' steals the 2012 'lection.
You know, just like he did in 2008, like all the Fox News idiots told them he would.
If someone falls for the same bullshit after that short amount of time, they really shouldn't be allowed to drive or operate power tools.
What I am scared about is if Obama wins the electoral college and loses the popular vote.....some shit might get started by these maniacs.
prepnuts. That was supposed to be prepnuts.
like modern pharaohs surrounded by their shit
"They died as they lived: surrounded by enough sodium and preservatives to keep their bodies from decaying well into the next age. Who were these great beings? Were they worshiped as gods? And what is the significance of this puzzling "WAL-MART"?
It confounds me that food hoarders hoard Kraft mac and cheese and Twinkies instead of seed packets, canning supplies and gardening tools. Even city dwellers could put together a rooftop or balcony garden if they REALLY had no space-- most suburban homes have a decent enough yard to put up some raised beds and grow a few dozen veggies. I'll enjoy my fresh cucumbers, you guys go and enjoy your botul-tastic can of creamed corn.
Given their age, is "prepper" the past tense of "preppie?"
And wouldn't you like to be a prepper, too?
|Jet Bin Fever |
Considering that I keep maybe 20 to 30 cans of whatever in my cabinets at any given time and still find shit that's expired every now and then, I couldn't imagine trying to manage a huge room full of food, preservatives or not. It would be like finding that ancient can of cranberry sauce times a couple thousand.
Ancient canned goods were good enough for the people of Waterworld.
Dude, I run a small grocery store, keeping track of expiration dates is the most tedious part of my job. The worst part is that it's always exactly the shit you KNOW will be unsold but are just there because if you didn't sell it you couldn't accept food stamps for Red Bull.
|William Topaz McGonagall |
meanwhile in Africa
Err, isn't it a bit dangerous having so much stuff stacked up in big piles and shelfs in a crammed place? What if an earthquake hits all that? You could end up buried under all those cans.
The weird pauses, stutters, and exasperated noises remind me an awful lot of You Suck At Photoshop.
Been had snacks!
I'm glad for people like this, because if shit ever goes bad enough to need all these supplies, there will be people with them stockpiled for me to steal from.
you won't even have to steal them. The owners will be long-dead from botulism.
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