I'm not trying to be condescending, but I'm honestly curious, how is he still alive?

Okay, bathroom clean! Time to get cooking.

If I can't fix it, I can fix it so it can't be fixed.

Reminds me of that "tour of a crack house" video a few years back.

Solution: Rip parts out until the problem stops.

it's a fucking wonder he hasn't fallen through into the basement yet. or died of food poisoning.