The Rifftrax for this was one of their enjoyable ones.

This movie has a shirtless Jesse Ventura inviting the kid to join him in bed so he can awkwardly whisper him a story.

Jim Belushi, hot off his success in K-9, as the school principal!

How James Belushi spent the year 1990

1) Lead actor in "Dimenticare Palermo", an Italian Mob movie, written by Gore Vidal, costarring Mimi Rogers

2) Lead actor alongside straight man Charles Grodin in "Taking Care of Business" which if I remember correctly was his second headlining role in a big Hollywood picture after the success of "K-9"

3) And another big comedy vehicle, "Mr. Destiny" with Linda Hamilton, Michael Caine, and Rene Russo

4) Small role in "Wedding Band" starring an absolute nineties wasteland of actors, William Katt, Joyce Hyser, Pauly Shore, Fran Drescher, Robert Wuhl, and Tim Kazurinski

5) Cameo in "Masters of Menace", some awful "Cannonball Run" ripoff about motorcycle gangs and corrupt cops

6) And of course "Abraxas"

In one whirlwind decade, that fuckin dude made the world a worse place, one movie theater at a time

Bulky outer-space villian Sven-Ole Thorson impregnates an Earthwoman with a rapidly maturing kid (by touching her with his hand that is glowing at the time) and comes back later to use the kid to acquire the "Anti-life Equation" (hmm) and fortunately for the filmmakers both he and ex-space-cop partner Ventura are reduced to awkwardly tackling each other instead of fighting with futuristic outer-space weaponry which was mostly conviently destroyed when they crash-landed in a lake. Except for the "answer box" with can do all sorts of things, including scan people for the "anti-life equations" and then kill them if they don't contain it.

And it's not only a direct-to-video production, it's a Canadian direct-to-video production.