Ping Pong opened up China, perhaps Basketball could help with the North Korea problem.
Oh lord no, with a money print jacket.
Just ask him something about his stupid trainwreck of a life and pretend you didnt actually invite dennis rodman to talk about north korea. You could predict a viral clip with a combination like that in your sleep. Here's another one: Mike Tyson reads Moby Dick
Mike Tyson is smarter than this guy, and more relevant. Also, he loves testing out big words*, so I think it'd be a treat to hear him read the classics.
*My favorite Tyson moment: A few years ago, the new, cleaned-up, repentant Tyson was being interviewed by a minor local reporter somewhere. The reporter was talking about some shady incident from the fighter's past, and asked him "what would you do if I said I think you're a coward?", to which Tyson replied, "well, under thothe thircumthtantheth I would athail you." The reporter quickly changed the subject.
Well crap, I take it back. Mike is a misunderstood GRANDMA STAIRPUSHER ILL EAT YOUR CHILDRENS TESTICLES
Shorter Gmork: People are incapable of change.
anybody who saw the hangover is financially supporting a convicted rapist
The guy is a former basketball player and Georgie-boy there thinks he should've been a journalist or a diplomat? Who's the dumb one?
Next, Charlie Sheen's (or some other celeb douche) going to go to the DPRK and be expected to hold Kim's feet to the fire on these issues to? Why don't we demand this from out government and diplomats, not has-been celebrities?
Rodents of Unusual Size
I have two theories. Either
a) Rodman is really just about the dumbest person alive and Vice is kicking itself for using him (not to mention horribly embarrassed by his total ignorance)
b) Rodman is a CIA tool who was told to befriend Kim because this is so ludicrous it just might be something those motherfuckers cooked up.
I'd go with
c) Vice needed to get as cozy as possible so they could shoot what they're actually there to shoot, so Rodman's unconditional love of Kim was just the ticket. In a perfect world Rodman would be in on it all for the awesome footage they get from this "friendship", especially if it takes another trip.
Vice has learned the value in playing nice with people who've done rather bad things to get the story (paintball with Hezbollah, hanging with warlords in Liberia etc.) so this really isn't far off.
also, both kim jong il and kim jong un (and kim jong jam, the older brother) were huge 1990's chicago bulls fans - students who went to the same school as jong un in switzerland remember him being driven to paris for nba exhibitions, team jerseys being worn, and for having expensive basketball shoes they all were jealous of
they also tried to get jordan to come over, all of it underwritten by samsung - jordan turned them down
there's a photo of a young jong un wearing a rodman jersey on this here cybersphere if you'd care to look
Hello, this is Obama. I'd like to speak to the President. No, I do not want to speak to the military commander, I want to speak to the guy in charge.
You know what? Just have your dead grandfather call me if he wakes up.
|Hugo Gorilla |
"One thing I noticed about him is that he's very humble."
As humble as you imagine a dictator that uses his country's resources to keep him and a select few in opulence while many North Koreans have to eat tree bark just to keep from starving to death, I'm sure.
Considering how tightly controlled the visits are for laypeople, they probably pulled the stops making the place not look like a shithole for an actual "celebrity". If I were borderline retarded and completely unaware about how the country really is behind the curtains, I'd likely walk away thinking it was an alright place too and the leader was getting a bad rap.
Rodman's not that dumb. He took an opportunity in public to do something faux-shocking once again, just like the good ol'' days, so that now everyone talks about him for awhile. He probably figures he can use this press to his advantage somehow. Maybe he's pitching a new reality show or something stupid....who knows.
Oh, Rodman is profoundly dumb. I'm just saying, this reeks of one of his dipshit publicity stunts like he used to do in the 90s.
Put me down for the "Rodman Isn't Dumb" camp.
The proof: It's 2013 and we are talking about Dennis Fucking Rodman.
Stabface for the win
This is worth remembering at a time like this...
North Korea jails a "criminal" for questionable crimes, AND his descendents, creating prison camps that hold whole families as punishment. The U.S. socks people with debt by misleading them in various ways, health care costs, education fees, investment failures, all forms of debt that their descendents inherit and are forced to pay. I wouldn't use Rodman's irrational rhetoric of "the same," there are similarities in that.
I'm human, so given the chance I would lock up a bunch of our top 1% hoarding all our nation's wealth today, AND their descendents. It might be a majority of our oppressed nation who would agree. We prison-camped Japanese, and all for public irrational fears. Rodman isn't a "fucking moron," just a life voyager of incredible calm and peace, a natural diplomat and the greatest hope for N. Korean relations of all time. /troll
We literally have more people in jail than anyone. We don't have specific rape rooms, but that's just because we rape prisoners indiscriminately. Also, most of the people in prison are there for a crime the President himself could admit to committing without getting criticized. They criticized him for ordering a hamburger with Dijon mustard for fuck sake.
Oh, wait, all of that is a troll. You apparently don't inherit debt. That's awesome. My father was always under the impression that you could. I'm not sure why I listened to him on something involving financial matters.
i am listening to this while i do homework and i had to stop because my ears began to bleed
Why does Rodman talk with a west African accent?
|Spaceman Africa |
oh my god I saw a news video of this earlier and I was convinced it was the Onion and never questioned it
Ladies and Gentlemen, THE WORM.
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