Turns out Jerry Seinfeld wasn't the funny person on Seinfeld.
Everything about this movie was a terrible idea starting right at the title. Do adults want to go see a cartoon about Seinfeld routines minus Larry David? Do kids want to go see a bee talking about Jews?
It still just about broke even :(
|Prickly Pete |
Y'all are acting like Jerry has no talent on his own. I agree that Larry was the genius of "Seinfeld," but some of the most classic episodes come from after Larry left and Jerry took over as show runner. Elaine's dancing, Man hands, "The jerk store called, they're running out of you!" George's answering machine, George taking naps under his desk, "Helloooooooooooooo!," Festivus, and that's just some of the biggest staples; within those seasons are dozens and dozens of hilarious things (George's candy lineup, for instance). So yeah Larry David is a genius and perhaps laid the groundwork, but Jerry isn't exactly a hack.
Having said that: fuck this movie, obviously.
To be fair most of those episodes can be traced to the great team of writers they had assembled. Festivus was more or less a true story from one writer's childhood.
This movie was just a token "I have small children now so I need to make a kid's movie" gesture.
An old friend of mine was obsessed with Seinfeld, and after some conversation that he was enthralled with and I was just barely interested in regarding the funniest parts of Seinfeld, we determined that my favourite creative force on the show was some non-celebrity writer nobody had heard of (dunno his name off hand).
So, that guy/girl was the true genius on Seinfeld.
Probably Larry Charles who's a long-time collaborator with Larry David, going all the way back to Fridays.
This was hands-down the weirdest, dumbest idea for a movie I've ever seen. I watched it with my nephew once (although, granted, this was an edited-down TV version)
The plot of the movie is that Seinfeld, a bee, discovers honey farming, which is akin to the Holocaust for bees. Seeing this, he decided to sue the entire human race. There then proceeds to be a long, drawn-out court battle where Seinfeld explains to the jury that bees can indeed talk, and have been doing so in secret since time immemorial, and that what the humans are forcing bees to do is essentially slavery. There... isn't really any bad guy or villain that I can remember. He wins the case and bees now are allowed to produce their own honey and sell it to humans, which I would imagine they would have no inclination to do, because they don't use money.
A human girl also leaves her husband to be with a bee.
WHO ARE THE AD WIZARDS WHO CAME UP WITH THIS ONE? WHAT IS THE DEEEEEEAL?
It's like Antz, if that movie had been about washed up celebrities impersonating the insect world... in an unfunny way.
"Bee Larry King"
IT WAS AN ALL-NIGHTER WRITING IT, BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!!!
Pretty sure Larry King just calls every TV show and movie to get himself written into it. I think he's voiced himself in every animated show ever, since the beginning of animation. (yes! a larry king is old joke! suck on it!)
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? "BEE LARRY KING?" THAT'S NOT HOW THIS IS SUPPOSED TO WORK!
For cartoon analogue characters you have to use name puns! The Flintstones had Stony Curtis and Ann Margrock. Spongebob had George Bubble-You Bush. My Little Pony had Horseama Bin Laudin and Palomino Mussolini.
THAT'S HOW THIS WORKS! YOU CAN'T JUST STICK "BEE" IN FRONT OF A NAME! THIS IS SETTING A TERRIBLE PRECEDENT! I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN! YOU WILL NEVER KNOW ANOTHER NIGHT OF PEACE!
|Seven Arts/H8 Red |
I don't blame Seinfeld for this. I blame Saturday Night Live for this. Most of the SNL Bees sketches were just Lorne Michaels deliberately ignoring an NBC memo. Bee Movie, by comparison, is too earnest with those "bees = oppressed minorities" jokes.
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