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Desc:I feel bad for the staff that had to clean it up.
Category:Accidents & Explosions, Horror
Tags:Monty Python, nubs, home depot, apotemnophilia, xenomelia
Submitted:themilkshark
Date:04/16/13
Views:2115
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Comment count is 30
takewithfood
How are you supposed to cut both your arms off with handsaws? I hope they at least name this paradox after him.
chumbucket
*Achievement Unlocked*

SteamPoweredKleenex
I think it's kind of like juggling. You have to let gravity do the work.

RockBolt
It's like Bender reattaching his own arms - "I don't know how you did that"

mouser
Missing tag: xenomelia
chairsforcheap
oh god... i forgot about that documentary i watched that was posted here

snothouse
Glad we saved the life of "Sawing Off My Own Arms Man".
fedex
how about a big hand for everyone!

Oscar Wildcat
The guy was in serious trouble! Wouldn't you have lent him a hand?

EvilHomer
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say it was a cry for help.

ashtar.
We need to safeguard his right to bear arms.

Vicious
Show of hands, who wouldn't have helped him?

Architeuthis Tux
I'm completely stumped. Can't think of a single person that could've helped.

Steebis
I saw that one coming a mile off and these cutting puns can do a lot of arm.

fatatty
I know I wouldn't have elbowed my way into that situation. I'm pretty sure that's what we have the Army for anyways.

oddeye
Not all bad news. The answer to that "Where are the Andes located?" joke is still at the end of your (severed) armies!

memedumpster
I am genuinely at a loss to imagine how someone can do that. Not regarding a motive, but logistically.
Oscar Wildcat
It's amazing the kinds of things we see in the news now that powerful opiates are so plentiful and readily prescribed.

memedumpster
I guess it's inevitable, like when you first realize, thanks to the Internet, that some people can, in fact, fuck themselves.

Pillager
It's all in the wrists.

Blue
Actually people have been having a hard time getting pain meds for a while. I suspect it's kind of like the medical marijuana system. In theory, your doctor could give the recommendation for MMJ. In practice, doctors are afraid of losing their practices or even being prosecuted by the DEA, so even legitimate MMJ patients have to go to doctors that do nothing but give recommendations for MMJ. Of course, those doctors don't have much to lose by giving recommendations to anyone.

I wouldn't be surprised if the crackdown preceded the epidemic. That would be pretty consistent with every other fucking drug they've ever cracked down on.

SolRo
Don't feel too bad for them, home depot has a giant section of cleaning products for their convenience.
Gmork
Just watched Evil Dead in theatres last night. It was alright. More startles than scares, but good gore and really cringeworthy moments.
cognitivedissonance
"WOULD YOU KINDLY SAW YOUR OWN ARMS OFF?"
Miss Henson's 6th grade class
I demand a "Monty Python" tag.
Paracelsus
Yeah, that's exactly what kind of day this was.
Caminante Nocturno
Fatality
Oscar Wildcat
<

EvilHomer
Hello!

I don't think that will work.

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