|misterbuns - 2013-09-19 |
The internet demons will NEVER let you post that link! Muahahaha!
|EvilHomer - 2013-09-19 |
I believe him. Having lived in Missouri before, I can tell you that the picture's a pretty accurate depiction of Missourians.
Mostly the Ozarks and especially Knob Knoster.
Though East St. Louis is coming up fast on the demon-o-meter, and of course there's Cape Girardeau, spawning pit of Rush Limbaugh.
I hate the Ozarks so much. I'm pretty sure they named after Ozark, Fifth Baron of Dis and Dread Under-Khan of the Stygian Blood Hordes.
I mean, why the fuck are they called mountains, anyways? They're flat as Kansas and only half as interesting. And the weather there, cold as it gets, you'd figure it'd at least have the decency to drop some snow BUT NOOOOOO everything's ice and bare pavement. I liked the lightning, sure, and the sudden torrential rainstorms might have been nice if the rest of the day wasn't so damn miserable. And the bugs just pissed me off. They were too monstrous to ignore in the normal manner, yet they weren't monstrous ENOUGH to be objects of curiosity and ironic amusement. Like Georgia, for example: their bugs are beasts, but it's kind of cool, charming even, because those bugs are just so damn big and outlandish and *interesting*. You feel like an explorer on a scientific mission to some alien jungle planet. But Missouri bugs fall square into the uncanny valley between tolerable bugs and awesome bugs; they're just shit.
Oh, and fuck Branson too.
Point of order- East Saint Louis is not in Missouri but Illinois.
And there are a few oases of niceness here. I live in suburban St. Louis, and it's not too bad. The nutty politics of the conservative, pro-business state government is infuriating, though.
True, I was just including East St. Louis in the vicinity, the same way most people lump the KS and MO sides of Kansas City together.
And yes, the politics are nutty. That fucking billionaire douchebag who seems to think everyone can live without taxes for firefighters and police would do everyone a favor if he'd quit paying canvassers to lie and bother people at grocery stores across the state and just hurry up and die of a heart attack already.
|THA SUGAH RAIN - 2013-09-19 |
"And when I opened that email - I SAY! - BEHOLD! PEOPLE OF GOD! A DEMON!"
We've all been there, my brother.
Yours In Christ,
Leon Sumbitches (Real name Brian Wheat as has been proven)
|La Loco - 2013-09-19 |
I thought you had to have cybersex with an internet noob to get rid of internet demon possession.
|Aelric - 2013-09-19 |
I'd deposit something horrific in his box, if you know what I mean...
I mean pooping in his dickhole, ok?
|Comeuppance - 2013-09-19 |
If some guy constantly asked for my picture after it was clear I was hesitant, I'd probably do something like that too.
I could never hope in a million years that it would turn out as well as it did for that guy.
|SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-09-19 |
Man, that's some Pat Robertson-level making-shit-up right there.
|kamlem - 2013-09-20 |
Anything to do with T.B. Joshua and The Synagogue, Church of All Nations (SCOAN) is amazing.
|Uulanbaatorbaby - 2013-09-20 |
Reminds me of this Someting Awful gem.
|gravelstudios - 2013-09-20 |
How can anybody be this gullible? Then again, people in the U.S. are still sending money to 'Nigerian princes', so I guess we're even.
Is this a normal thing that happens to Nigerian internet users? Is Demoning the Nigerian equivalent of the Nigerian Bank Scam?
|Spaceman Africa - 2013-09-20 |
I read that as "I Matt a Damon on the Internet."
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