Jack Dalton Holy shit-- he does look like one of the Nasty Boys.
Oscar Wildcat This guy has perfected a magic that allows him to totally fuck with cops and they are rendered powerless to resist. I think he is some kind of elemental force? What is his secret?
blue vein steel as crazy as he may be, years of experience have taught him that most cops would rather do anything other than deal with someone who is annoying and insane but also relatively harmless. It's easier to laugh off his bullshit and tell him to keep moving than taking him in, booking him, letting him go after an hour (knowing that he's not going to show up to pay some loitering fine) and doing another 2 hours of paperwork.
blue vein steel also, this is a dupe, but i misspelled FEDSMOKER in the original. No problem, Sheriff Danker finally got linked and we could all use more FEDSMOKER in our lives.