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Desc:Put on the full armour of god, fer crissakes!
Category:Religious, Crime
Tags:satan, Christian, steal, grape, crime of the century
Submitted:kamlem
Date:04/06/14
Views:1482
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Comment count is 19
Born in the RSR - 2014-04-06
Simpsons did it.
RedRust - 2014-04-06
That was a funny episode.

Xenocide - 2014-04-06
Duuuuuh, it's the company's fault for making you want grapes so much!

Scrimmjob - 2014-04-06
I remember my grandma doing this kind of thing all the time when i was a kid. I thought for sure she'd be arrested.
Old_Zircon - 2014-04-06
About a decade ago the bass player in my band practically lived off of doing this stuff.

Later on he started dating my roommate and when I was away for the weekend he TOOK ALL OF MY BEDSHEETS AND MADE HIMSELF A TENT ON THE BACK PORCH. By the time I got back they'd been rained on and gotten moldy. Which is what happens when your parents are upper middle class academic-hippies who raised you with no sense of boundaries.

Old_Zircon - 2014-04-06
Oh, and when I moved out of that apartment he got all huffy that I wasn't leaving my french press and cooking pots for him to use when he was staying over (which was pretty much 6 days a week minimum at that point) and locked himself in his girlfriend's room instead of helping me move.

EvilHomer - 2014-04-06
People like him were why the Bible invented stonings.

Oscar Wildcat - 2014-04-06
What a sweet woman! She needs to hook up with the right Rev. Billy, who will explain to her the exact nature of the devil putting those ideas into her head. It's a lot more prosaic than you think, lady. But a whole lot more evil than your imagination might allow for.
Koda Maja - 2014-04-06
The devil and god have nothing better to do than fuck with people's impulse control at the grocery store?
exy - 2014-04-06
Say you're thinking about a plate of shrimp, and out of the blue someone says "plate" or "shrimp" or "plate of shrimp."
Riskbreaker - 2014-04-06
This woman probably eats sushi and doesn't pay for it.

Old_Zircon - 2014-04-06
The whole "lattice of coincidence" speech might be my favorite thing ever filmed.

RedRust - 2014-04-06
The thing I hate about preachy sermons is when the pastor admits to some sort of sinful struggle, which is trivial in nature (like eating a couple of grapes in grocery store). Of course he/she doesn't talk about their true inner demons in their sermon/sermonette.
SteamPoweredKleenex - 2014-04-06
Or any felonies that remain unsolved.

EnochEmery - 2014-04-06
It starts with a grape and ends with a guy on Obamacare marrying his dog.
Meerkat - 2014-04-06
Yup. Indisputable proof. Nothing to do with you being a terrible person at all. It's all because of the spirits.
ashtar. - 2014-04-06
As an agent of The Dark One myself, I'd be willing to bet the message she was supposed to get was something about "rape." She probably has fillings, those always mess with the reception.
StanleyPain - 2014-04-06
Because nothing says "taking personal responsibility" like believing that a magical demon is whispering things into your ear that might make you steal a grape.
Jet Bin Fever - 2014-04-07
Every time you eat one of the grapes in the grocery store, Jesus CRIES. WAY TO MAKE JESUS CRY.

I love this especially because testing bite-sized fruit like grapes is an acceptable and time tested tradition.
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