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Desc:'At first I thought... maybe it's horse meat?'
Category:Horror
Tags:steak, your dog wants steak, your baby wants what the dog is having
Submitted:cognitivedissonance
Date:05/25/14
Views:3951
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Comment count is 63
RocketBlender
I have a friend that's always bugging me to make them chicken fried steak, but never wants to chip in when me and friends eat. I think I may have just found the solution...
Binro the Heretic
Didn't they just do a big cull of the dairy herds because of the drought?
oddeye
How is this possible?
infinite zest
eating steak with scissors?

Crab Mentality
Aside from the 30% solution mentioned further down in the comments, it's because those steaks are super-thin. I would have thought it was flank steak.

Also, I don't know if steakhouses have distorted people's assumed value of steak like Starbucks did with coffee, (Brew it yourself for 64 cents a gallon!) but what she got looks like a five dollar steak put through a deli slicer.

SolRo
ironically, here in the south-west, flank steak is priced the same as T-bone steaks.

infinite zest
"It said 'Boneless Beef Ribeye Steak' and I love 'Boneless beefridsffdhhf Steak..'"
cognitivedissonance
This is probably the fastest I've ever seen something move through the hopper.

Like tainted steak through this lady's colon.
Bort
"It's suckle-lent".
ashtar.
"Don't forget to suscribe."

jreid
"HEY GUYS"

Jet Bin Fever
Aren't there enforced laws about meat labeling? I mean, they can't say a cut of meat is a cut of meat if it isn't from that certain part of cow, right? There ARE RULES RIGHT? That's what I want to know. I just don't see how this is possible, unless the idea is to give such small portions that you split up an steak into 8 portions.
oddeye
Wondering the same thing myself. There has got to be some kind of catch, surely?

baleen
The labels say the steak contains "30% of a solution.*" Those are the exact words. You might not be shocked to find out that the FDA exerts very little control on what you can call food in this country.

The solution is probably soy, sugar, gums of some kind, and other binding agents. There's your savings.

SolRo
net weight; 3.5oz, probably with water added to boost that.

so for lets say 3oz of actual meat, comes out to about to a little over a pound.

also cheaper to supply meat if you pump it full of preservatives and "spices" and "nitrates"...can source it from the cheapest place possible and ship it for long distances (possibly unfrozen?).

SolRo
errr, over a pound.

SolRo
ah ok so 30% water, that makes it .50 a pound.

this can be from the right part of cow carcass, but its also probably from the lower end of the grade scale allowed for human consumption. Like the beef ground up to be cheap hamburgers.

memedumpster
It's just like Waffle House steak.
BorrowedSolution
Huh. I'd give it a try, actually. Probably stir fried or deep fried.. This is all after I offer some to the dog and see what he thinks of it.
boner
Throw that in a pot with some carrots, a potato, cup of soup, baby you got a stew going.
il fiore bel
What do you need baby for? Is there really such little meat in that steak?

SolRo
better to buy a cheap cut of tough meat, roast it at 250 for 4 hours, then use the juices as the stock for the stew, while the beef itself will be fork tender.

cognitivedissonance
WHY DID PORTAL OF HOME EC FAIL

SolRo
Portal of Homo ErotiC stole all its traffic.

Gmork
I love making pot roasts. People think they are difficult and I don't correct them.

SolRo
http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/good-eats-beef-stew -recipe.html

is what I use for stew, it's the best stew I've ever had, despite thinking my family's recipe couldn't be topped.

It's figuratively like food giving your tastebuds oral.

Callamon
How does nobody in this group get the Arrested Development reference ?

Gmork
I guess I suck, because I still can't figure out where or what the reference is.

infinite zest
The best score I found at the Dollar Tree was a bottle of sriracha. A big one. Not the one with the rooster on the bottle but like some other brand. That and 2 squirt guns and a frisbee. 3 dollars . I love you dollar tree
il fiore bel
I'm such a whore for dollar stores.

Cheap dishware (comes in handy if you need coffee mugs or plates at work), candy, plastic storage containers, holiday needs, decent cling wrap, snacks, you name it. The best thing I got at a dollar store (Family Dollar actually) was extra virgin olive oil. And it didn't taste like ass.

Of course, I don't expect half that stuff to last the year (though the dishes have held up), but it's nice having something around until you can afford something decent.

cognitivedissonance
It's a potluck, I go there for candy because I am a candy addict. And greeting cards, because greeting cards are like a pop now and fuck that.

Hooker
I've found the spread of dollar stores has push me more towards owning less and owning better quality things.

Binro the Heretic
It's the only place I can find Crows licorice candy, anymore.

oddeye
I wish I owned less-but-better in general too and for somethings like knives, surgical equipment, boats and shit it makes a lot of sense.

However for the majority of stuff you can get away with the bare minimum and still accomplish the same goals such as with a cheap hammer for banging the occasional nail. This is doubly true if you need but rarely use an item that can be easily replaced at a fraction of the cost such as a screw driver.

The key, I've found, is to work out what you really need and like, antique pocket watches for example, and get the best you can afford. Other things you can find a middle ground such as disposable surgical blades of reasonable quality. Then you can fill in the holes with bargain basement throw-away items.

One big advantage of this method is that if you ever have to suddenly move, say due to eviction or court order for squatting, you can simply take items of value and dump the rest.

Thanks.

EvilHomer
Save ya moneys foh thaat Patek Philippe, fackahs! Doent get suckahd into bouying all those so-cahlled "luxury" hammahs the WENCHES always try an sell ya down at the Thai mahket! It's a FAHKING RIPOFF. NOT FAKHING WOTH IT! AHNTIQUE WOOTCHES. Aye? AH NAHICE POCKET WOOTCH. Aachie says, that's whayah you downt want to be a FAHKING SKINFLINT.

oddeye
I saw a hammer that cost dollars yesterday. Unless you hammer shit for a living I doubt you could justify such an expenditure.

Not too sure where you are going with that Homer.

fluffy
I still have and use a bunch of glasses I bought at a dollar store in NYC. They're quite nice. Often guests ask "where did you get those glasses? I want some!" and I tell them where I got them and they're disappointed.

Rafiki
Play portions of this video at 75% speed with Sarah McLachlan dubbed over top and I think you could get minimum wage passed.
SolRo
5 for testing it on her kids first.
Sudan no1
Thank you lady, for finally showing me a practical use for children.

RedRust
My wife made a comment that this is bad parenting.

Cheese
It's nit just bad parenting, it's bad humaning.

memedumpster
Whatever, I would have spit it out and been like "oh god, kids, you just ate horse! I'm so sorry, ewwww, don't tell your friends. YouTube is going to freak out..."

fluffy
the Brussels sprouts were 99 cents each, making them INCREDIBLY EXPENSIVE Brussels sprouts
sasazuka
We have Dollar Tree in Canada but our Dollar Trees don't have refrigerated sections (excluding Coca-Cola/Pepsi/off-brand soda coolers), or at least not in eastern Ontario. I don't know about Dollar Tree stores in the rest of Canada. I think you can get canned meat but that's about it.
BorrowedSolution
sasazuka: I've been to quite a few parts of this fine nation and no, I've never seen a refrigerated section in a dollar store.

sasazuka
I think the closest thing I've seen to a dollar store that sells non-canned meat is Giant Tiger but I think their meat is comparable to budget supermarkets and it's very limited as I don't think most GT stores have butchers on the premises.

Gmork
Our dollar tree sells lots of freezer/fridge items.

The best thing is that they have the medium size ice cream containers, in raspberry and orange sherbet flavor. Also icee cups in red and blue. Cant beat that for a buck.

memedumpster
We have Dollar General grocery stores and the back wall of our Dollar Trees are all refrigerated, though a lot of warm shelf food is sold there, which this steak might have been.

cognitivedissonance
But can it be boiled in milk and served with jelly beans?

EvilHomer
Forget the refrigeration; what bothers me about this is the price. I have never seen a dollar store that sells things for a dollar. Where the hell are y'all living?

Callamon
5 stars for poor people paying for 6-8 dollar a pound z grade steak and 4 dollar a pound brussel sprouts. I guess it's better than getting cheese covered cheetos at the gas station...
EvilHomer
I usually buy whole tenderloins from the butcher when they go on sale. It's a little pricey for me, but it still works out to be between or a pound, sometimes less, and it's top quality filet steaks too.

baleen
Braising. Braising opens the door to enjoying the cheapest cuts of meat. I will take /lb. oxtail stew or pork shoulder braised for 5 hours over a cheaper cut of steak any day.
Go to a proper butcher and not to a grocery store, where cheaper cuts are now "trendy" thanks to the ubiquity of exotic cooking shows.

I also bought a beef heart, a frozen 5 lb. monster, for . About a lb is dross that can be thrown into broth and fat which can be used to cook or tossed. I trimmed it and braised it (heart can also be ground and eaten as burger) and it was fantastic, about 4 lbs of lean meat for .

Gmork
So what is braising, exactly?

StanleyPain
Man this makes me shudder just to watch. I can't even imagine how crap cheap this stuff must be. I'm amazed it's even edible.
SolRo
it's crap, but not cheap.

oddeye
It's , didn't you read the title?

il fiore bel
Maybe Sol is factoring in the cost of crippling diarrhea.

Snakeweapon
I was hoping that at the end of the clip it would be revealed that her children have been dead for seven years and she's been filming and feeding ghosts THE WHOLE TIME.
BHWW
Reminds me of those Mitchell & Webb parody adverts for a UK equivalent of your Dollar Generals and Dollar Trees

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nY6G2E8dgWU#t=29

"Like this chicken-style oven roaster, only 1.99!"
That guy
hell yes - I forgot that sketch

dairyqueenlatifah
For ? I'd be willing to try it. Looks like it'd be just fine in a stirfry.

Here in Ohio beef prices have shot through the roof (as in, the cheapest sirloins you can find are a pound), so I seriously doubt our Dollar Trees are selling them.
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