So this is what happens when Gen X gets old.
|Adham Nu'man |
He's cool, he's hip, he's 45.
They're right, golf is boring to watch. This looks worse.
Well, maybe not, if they're really driving their balls right into the crowds. (Who'll get taken out by a shot to the temple this time?)
|Oscar Wildcat |
It could be louder still if I put a trash can over your head and beat you to death with a baseball bat.
The name is wrong to attract those hip young kids
|That guy |
You couldn't submit Bikini Golf instead?
|infinite zest |
Golf's actually more fun to watch than most spectator sports if you're there. My little brother just won the Oregon Special Olympics State Games in golf for the second year in a row the other week. You're not hitting the ball but you're moving every step of the way. When I won tickets and went to the Super Bowl I was stuck at the very top and it was raining so hard that everyone was just watching it by the snack bar next to the 14 dollar Bud lights. Then you're soaked and have to sit on an air conditioned bus... Anyway I don't watch either sport (ok I was rooting for the Seahawks and the blazers but it was a quiet root for the home team)
Golf on tv isn't that different than Tour de France on tv. It's beautiful scenery and you can't even tell what they're doing. In golf you can barely see the ball and Tour de France you can't judge that incline. Just looks like dudes riding their bikes. Hockey looks like people skating (fox tried to remedy that but purists said "no way!)
hockey is all about the slow motion replay.
|John Holmes Motherfucker |
Why isn't golf more like the Hunger Games?
Because the country club makes sure the poor, starving people are never allowed in sight of the master class?
their campaign is asking for ,000, and they've raised 00 with 15 days left.
Oh, and it's on flexible funding, so the scammers will get their money even if the goal isn't reached.
Aw man! I wanted to go but had just started a new job, didn't have a valid passport, was halfway across the country.. any interesting stories?
It was one of the last events to take place in the Plaza of Nations, which was an outdoor venue left over from Expo 86. It was a weird kind of place as it was literally right beside BC Place and a popular Casino, the place nevertheless had the distinct feel of a nearly-abandoned commercial centre.
We showed up early, so I decided to have dinner at a bar in the plaza. The bar could seat probably 100 people, so naturally there was my group and one other. The staff had the distinct look of a bar that loses money and nobody cares; I knew the food would be tasteless and possibly the beer not cold before I ordered.
I sat outside, wondering if the wait staff had forgotten about me. Eventually my food came (my suspicions would prove correct), and despite the fact that there were three waitresses and only two tables with customers, I would never see another waitress come by again. The other table was interesting, though. It was three or four normal-looking-and-acting people sitting at their table and then this one guy in a long, leather trenchcoat (this was in June) with the most tangible sense of entitlement I've ever seen in someone's body language. He would buzz around their table trying to be the center of the conversation constantly, only sitting down if he had everyone else's attention. My friends and I could swore he looked familiar, and we all wondered, is that guy an actor or just a huge douche? Weeks or months later, we would put together that he was Zack Ward, the "star" of the currently-in-production Postal.
We found seats early (the venue was made up Epidaurus theatre-style, so you just sat anywhere you wanted; we and most other early arrivals instinctively sat well back, as if to retain as much of our dignity from association with the event itself). I've told this story at least two times on here before, but the closest early group by us were apparently "goons" because who should show up to hobnob with them but Lowtax himself. One of the people went up to shake his hand and introduce himself, as humans do, to which Lowtax responded with shock, looking at his hand, and then immediately turning around so that he was facing directly away from my friend and also not facing the people he was talking to. The group he was talking to immediately reacted with sympathy for my friend with calls of "Awwww!" and the like, forcing Lowtax to interact with my friend, meaning a random assorted group of SA forum goons are, at least according to this display, more well adjusted human beings than Lowtax. (!!)
The event itself mostly filled up the Plaza, much to my surprise (so, maybe 2000-3000 people). It was laid out with the four boxing matches interspersed with baffling martial arts performance by a mixture of adults and children, which wound up taking up the majority of show. The boxing matches were against three people I didn't know (one of them, as mentioned, being a 16 or 17 year old kid) and Lowtax. Uwe displayed zero showmanship in them, opting instead to just go straight at his opponents (including the kid). The opponents all just tried to hang on and all lost to KO with the exception of Lowtax, who was doing a horrid vaudeville slapstick until Uwe got a couple hits in at which point he forfeited, meaning Lowtax is also more of a wimp than three random people, one of which was a kid. The kid, meanwhile, got on the microphone after the bout and, _clearly_ loopy from the match, went on to explain that, because of what he learned in the ring, he is now a huge supporter of Uwe Boll's films. The crowd sat stunned for that one.
After the show, everyone just left. There was no after-show buzz at all. Just a crowd dispersing.
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