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Desc:The scoop
Category:News & Politics
Tags:ice cream, walmart, oh my scammy flammy mammy, food horror week
Submitted:infinite zest
Date:08/01/14
Views:1487
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Comment count is 30
SolRo
"The thing that causes ice cream to melt is how much ice cream is in it, our sandwiches are mostly pulp and binder."
matlock
Didn't you watch the video?

1:10: Wal Mart ice cream sandwiches are healthy.
1:50: There's nothing unhealthy about them.

SolRo
the second part might be accurate, the first part is obviously retarded.

Oscar Wildcat
So basically this is foamed guar gum and some synthetic vanilla? Sounds like Myhrvold's modernist cuisine to me.
Caminante Nocturno
Myhrvold's Modernist Cuisine was one of my favorite spells in D&D.

The Mothership
Ewww.
Azmo23
loving this rebirth of natural philosophers
georgian woman applies flame to snow and decides it is not made from frozen water
crazy russian boils coca cola to and declares all remaining product is sugar
SolRo
so try this; Look on the back of a coke can, read the ingredients. What's the second ingredient after water?

Albuquerque Halsey
Appeal to Nature fallicy; see me after class:

http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--o2mC_akJ-- /c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/19cthsq3h02qrpng.png

Azmo23
i'm sure you just replied because i said crazy russian, but it's the name of his youtube channel not a descriptor i was applying to russians
also, my point was there is more in coke than just water and sugar

infinite zest
depends on where you are. Sometimes it's pee pee

Azmo23
i think somebody's been playing jokes on you iz

Oscar Wildcat
The third ingredient is nanotubes.

If this object doesn't melt, I wonder if it can decay? Does it come out the other end fully formed and ready for a second life as a devil dog or something?

infinite zest
makes me want to go to wal mart and do experiments on these things. Fuck it I will.

Oscar Wildcat
So it's been a few days, IZ. What were the results? Are you wearing the things around town as flip-flops? Feeding them to the neighborhood dogs? WE NEED ANSWERS, DAMNIT!

memedumpster
I drink the imported Coke from Mexico, they put goddamned nanotubes in it.

mashedtater
I vote for a food horror week
infinite zest
I second that vote, mashed tater

fluffy
I am really strongly considering bringing back schadenfood.org lately because of stuff like this.

Also the Lay's flavor contest. I tried the cappuccino ones on a lark, because I hate myself. But not enough to finish the bag, even with the help of my weekly cartooning group.

infinite zest
I miss bad candy too. It was like a decade ago (more than that) but I was down the hall from those guys covering e3. Kind of introduced me to some site called portalofevil. :)

StanleyPain
Yay, more stupid facebook-culture scaremongering by people too stupid to do even 5 minutes of basic research because DUHR CORPORIT FOODZ IZ BAD.

http://www.theskepticsguide.org/just-chill-it-doesnt-matter-th at-your-ice-cream-sandwich-wont-melt
Potrod
That's all well and good, but clearly, the real question we should be asking are: does it contain YOGA MAT or fish bladder?!

Riskbreaker
NANOMACHINES SON

M-DEEM
Wow, this is the motherfuckin' news
takewithfood
This wouldn't even get a passing mark at a grade school science fair.
Hooker
Love the news reporter at the end pushing the "What a bargain!" angle.
Caminante Nocturno
He's really going out of his way to stay faithful to the title of his stupid news segment.

SteamPoweredKleenex
It's a poor way of saying what needs to be said about this:

"Yes, it's not what most people would call 'real' ice cream, but it's not made of stuff you aren't already consuming and have consumed for years. Most importantly, what do you expect for next to nothing? Quality ice cream is fucking expensive, you uneducated dpishits!"

Rodents of Unusual Size
Can you imagine being so fat that this is the most newsworthy thing that has ever happened to you?
Dib
Fuckin' icecream how do they work?
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