Somebody should let him know that a cartoon bird shit on his chest.
How did this crap get out of the hopper? The songify version is way better.
Here it is for those of you philistines who don't know of what I speak.
Fuck if I know. I signed up for a different dating site once and all the women were uh I dunno how to describe it. They posted pictures that were either touched up or 20 years old, I don't know if they expected people not to notice or what. But they all claimed there were not there to play games and all they did was play games. So basically everything about them, from their photos to their profiles, was fake. And that was a PAY site.
And they all expected me to convince them to give me a chance. Like they were interviewing me for a job or something.
I've decided that some people are just better off single and that I am one of those people.
Yeah it's really strange, like "Satisfaction Guaranteed", so if I go on a date and it goes horrible I get my money back? I was on a date a couple of weeks ago with this girl I struck up a conversation with on OKCupid and we really hit it off. Like, she was from a suburb of the town I went to college in, seemed to have the same sense of humor.. everything, and then I met her and she was there with like 6 of her friends. I'd have to be a huge asshole to tell them to leave so we could be alone so I just sat there politely and drank my beer and tried to get a sentence in when I could. Anyway it didn't go the way I thought, which kinda sucked, but OKC's free so it cost me what I would've paid for a few beers in the first place. I actually left and turned out meeting a girl who had an equally weird Tinder date and we talked about the hopelessness of dating online and still regularly see each other, but not seriously (she's got a husband but is in an "open relationship" which is just kinda weird for me.)
Being single's actually pretty awesome until you find the right person; you're not tied down to anything except for your job and your friends. Like, even at my wedding I was so devoted to my fiancee that I realized I had no male "friends" (just a bunch of acquaintances) and had to use my two brothers and brother-in-law as groomsmen because I ignored all my college buddies in the exchange.
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