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Desc:Veronica Mars meets Buffy meets Dan O'Bannon! So wondrously fucked-up, I've seen it 3 times!
Category:Crime, Horror
Tags:Zombies, brains, veronica mars, the cw, cagney and pasty
Submitted:John Holmes Motherfucker
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Comment count is 33
Bort - 2015-03-23
I liked it, especially the little touches that show they've put some thought into it, like how she worries that she's going to inadvertently bring about a zombie apocalypse. If it keeps up this level of quality I'll be pretty happy.
Bort - 2015-03-23
But it's "iZombie".

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-23
iHate that shit.

chumbucket - 2015-03-23
iFly iPilot
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-23
No shit, when she was eating the brain chunks with noodles, I was eating shrimp lo mein! I LOL'd out loud!

I didn't know when I posted this that iZombie has the same creators as Veronica Mars, and I never really watched Veronica Mars, and yet even I was able to spot the similarities. I love the approach: Let's take an established format that we're already good at, and trash it with a crazy horror comic book concept. The premise is OUTRAGEOUS, but it's grounded in a well-crafted story that the writers understand. I really did watch this three times, and the dialogue is good enough that knowing what the characters are going to say only adds to the pleasure.

I love the way the most outrageous element, the eating of human brains, is handled here. The brain itself is firmer than it would be in real life, there's less blood, it's served on a bed of noodles... but it's still our heroine eating a human brain on-camera. I feel like they've taken great care to find just the right level of macabre, and in my opinion, they nailed it. I can't wait for part 2.
ashtar. - 2015-03-23
"I LOL'd out loud!"
I want to believe that you were being ironic there. I really do.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-23
I think you're being ironic, and that you really want to believe I wasn't being ironic, since, if I was being ironic, that would mean you had just taken an unfunny shit all over my joke, and that would be a dick move.

EvilHomer - 2015-03-23
Holmes got you there.

lotsmoreorcs - 2015-03-23
pretty clear from who posted this that they've nailed their target demographic who will shell out over the rest of their pathetic lives for their shows merchandise. i fucking hated this and im 25

ashtar. - 2015-03-23
Thanks, orcs. Let's everyone ignore my dumbassery and demand JHMF answer these stunning allegations!

Oscar Wildcat - 2015-03-23
We could load JHM into a fMRI machine and see if his boner neurons are firing when he watches the show. I'd put some money on shwing here, given John's propensity for manic pixie dream girls with quirky Problems like weird dietary issues and poor fashion sense.

EvilHomer - 2015-03-23
Flannel shirts and hoop earrings are NOT poor fashion sense!

Monkey Napoleon - 2015-03-23
If by all that nonsense you mean "Paint by numbers rich white girl 'dramedy' with trendy twist that was passe years ago", then yeah.

Alternatively, this was a better show when they made it 12 years ago and it was called Dead Like Me

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-23
>> i fucking hated this and im 25

That's about 10 years older than I would have guessed.

>>Alternatively, this was a better show when they made it 12 years ago and it was called Dead Like Me

Dead Like Me was a straight up drama, iZombie is a police procedural. They're not only different shows, they're different genres.

>>We could load JHM into a fMRI machine and see if his boner neurons are firing when he watches the show.

Glad to know that SOMEONE is still interested in my dick.

iZombie got good reviews, which proves nothing, but it makes it easy for me to ignore you boys, and your haughty petulant Oscar Wilde routine.

EvilHomer - 2015-03-23
I was trying to explain you to a friend of mine today, and I couldn't really do it.

I'm glad you are the way you are, though.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-23
>>If by all that nonsense you mean "Paint by numbers rich white girl 'dramedy' with trendy twist that was passe years ago", then yeah.

Again, this isn't a dramedy, it's a police procedural. You haven't even got the genre right.

The "twist" is that she catches murderers by eating the brains of murder victims, and experiencing their memories. It's certainly silly, but how was that "passe years ago". Was there a rash of brain eating detectives in the 80s?

The Mothership - 2015-03-23
First 5 minutes didn't bore me to sleep, so that's something. I'd probably watch it if I had time to watch TV.
Nominal - 2015-03-23
Gonna watch this later, but I'm wary. I loved Veronica Mars, but hated Buffy.
Rodents of Unusual Size - 2015-03-23
I don't hate this! I am quite pleasantly surprised.
Binro the Heretic - 2015-03-23
It's like they wrote a bunch of zombie & twentysomething drama tropes on index cards, shuffled the deck, drew about a dozen and ran with it.
TeenerTot - 2015-03-24
Gmork - 2015-03-24
This is a pile of fucking shit.

A "zombie" that retains mental faculty and solves crimes?

Did you all seriously upvote this?

A zombie, which you are all keen on shitting on the mere idea of, in an UNORIGINAL situation. Do you have any idea how many shitty people have tried this shitty concept before? Albeit without the crime solving, but I hardly see how that scooby-doo bullshit will make it any better.
Binro the Heretic - 2015-03-24
It pisses me off that they show her buying bronzer, like she's going to try to cover up her unnatural pallor, but then for the rest of the show she's walking around with pale skin and white hair.

I imagine someone said, "If we have her wear makeup and dye her hair, she'll look just like a normal non-zombie person. She already talks & acts like a normal non-zombie person. Viewers won't know she's a zombie. They'll think she's just some brain-eating freak. We need to have her in the white makeup all the time."

"But I wrote this really funny gag where she buys a lot of bronzer!"

"Fine, we'll leave that joke in. Okay, moving on..."

"Can I write another joke explaining why she doesn't use it?"

"No, moving on."

"But won't her family and friends say something about her suddenly white skin & hair and bloodless lips?"


"Well, we wrote their dialogue as if she still looks totally normal, because she was supposed to be covering up her zombie...ish...ness with makeup. If we have her looking like a walking corpse and nobody says anything, won't that seem...weird? We'll have to write a bit where she explains-"

"No we won't. Moving on..."

"I think not having her cover up with makeup will make the scenes where she interacts with other characters look laughable, but not in a good way. Besides, we could write a lot of great bits where she has problems with the makeup or someone almost catcher her without it."

"She HAS to have the white hair and pale skin. It's how the viewers will know she's a zombie! Moving on..."

"The name of the show is-"


baleen - 2015-03-24
For once I think I actually agree with Gmork.
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-25
Okay, to sum up: Monkey Napoleon hates it because it's formulaic. Binro hates it because it's random (opposite of formulaic), and because he just can't get past Bronzergate. To paraphrase 30 Rock, Gmork wants to bring more realism to the Robot vs Bear sketch. Do I have any idea how many shitty people have tried this shitty concept before? No, I guess I don't.

I think its fun to like things. Some people seem to think its fun to hate things. I think we can all agree; iZombie is a fun show.
EvilHomer - 2015-03-25
Random can be formulaic - case in point, Family Guy. Or, this show. It's "Formula by Manatee"; taking dumb, formulaic ideas and mixing them together in an arbitrary fashion.

And I don't know if this show is fun to hate. Eurovision is a show that's fun to hate. Big Bang Theory is a show that's fun to hate, from a distance, preferably in the form of small isolated clips. This? This just seems like a dumb network show that's fun to ignore and forget about entirely.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-25
Whatever works for you is fine with me, but I don't consider Family Guy to be random. It's an open ended formula, the content is varied, but always the formula holds.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-25
Come to think of it, Homer, having fun ignoring something is the same thing as hating it , but in a more passive-aggressive way.

lotsmoreorcs - 2015-03-25
Hey guys, I figured this would be as good a video to do this as any other, in accordance to what I think Zoe (the original user who registered here on poe as lotsmoreorcs) would have wanted. My name is Craig Almond I was traveling with Zoe for about three months through Georgia, Florida, Texas and eventually New Orleans. I know Zoe had communicated that she was in Dubai but that was some sort of joke she was trying to make apparently.

I don't really know how to go about saying what I need to say next so I will just link to the relevant article: http://bit.ly/1FGUzgb

And say that I know this community meant alot to Zoe because she was so enthusiastic when she turned me on to it, allowing me and a few others to use her username and password to submit videos (the izombie video comments were made by her friend Otter not her). This has been a really tough and shocking time for everyone and I thought it would be best to share the situation with everyone here because she really did consider y'all friends. This is not a sick fucking joke or an elaborate troll, I wish it was.
lotsmoreorcs - 2015-03-25
http://imgur.com/hl7pK0t :_(

ashtar. - 2015-03-25
So, Zoe is Julia Anderson?

That sucks.

EvilHomer - 2015-03-25
Hey John, I wasn't going to post this until next week, because the face is only half finished and I haven't even started on the background yet. However, in light of the news about Orcs, I might not get a chance to complete this painting for the foreseeable future, so here you go (apologies for the roughness):


Hope it cheers you up a little.
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2015-03-25
Episode 2 is about a zombie drug dealer, turning people into zombies so he can supply them with the brains they need. As he hands a frightened victim what looks like a clear plastic takeout container, he smiles maliciously, and tells her: "First rule of Brain Club... don't talk about Brain Club".

Fuck you, People Who Are Too Cool For This.
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