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Desc:These guys are all natural body builders.
Category:Horror
Tags:bodybuilding, steroids, bros, douchebags, Rich Piana
Submitted:Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Date:05/14/15
Views:1739
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Comment count is 51
infinite zest
That's not how you lift a dumbell. That's how you get a dumbell off of the ground. Pussies.
chumbucket
Now curl that shit.

Binro the Heretic
They're like the little kid in "A Christmas Story", the one whose mom wrapped him in so many thick winter clothes he couldn't put his arms down at his sides.
retrocious
I love how they line up one by one and twist sideways to squeeze through the three foot wide door.

hammsangwich
I don't understand why people want to look like this. They're not athletic. There isn't a single athlete on the planet that looks like that.

EvilHomer
Context? Who is this guy? What is the significance of "5%"? Skimming through his channel, he seems to have a lot of detractors.
StanleyPain
5% is his brand of nutrition products, which are probably all crap. He has detractors because he has the distinct body look of someone who uses site injections, especially in his arms. He probably uses a combo of synthol and some form of resin. He's fake as shit. You notice he doesn't lift the barbell himself because his mobility is probably crap (resin basically plasticizes your muscles and tendons all Bodyworlds style except while you're still alive) and it might cause serious injury due to the synthol.

OxygenThief
Jesus Christ, that resin sounds horrible.

StanleyPain
It's rare but bodybuilders will use it. A friend of mine who is big into martial arts turned me on to the "Bullshido" forums a long time ago which is basically a website devoted to people discussing and making fun of body building woo/pseudoscience. The shit that lifters will put in their body would made the most hardcoriest drug user run screaming.

Raggamuffin
undiluted workout powder directly into the mouth
chumbucket
Chased by a milk jug of urine.

Binro the Heretic
Hasn't it been proven time and again those protein powders & other such supplements are so much quackery?

Void 71
Our pussy-ass livers and kidneys couldn't handle dat swole protein powder slam.

infinite zest
It's mostly bullshit, but I had the flu this last weekend and the thought of food alone made me want to puke. So in sheer desperation I picked up a bottle of "muscle milk" at the convenience store, simply because I hadn't eaten in 4 days. And sure enough, it does what it says on the.. uhh.. nutrition facts. It wasn't like some Popeye reaction, but I did at least have some energy.

fedex
the Jarate diet

simon666
I gained roughly 18lbs of muscle over a year, using protein drinks, in part. The numbers I went by were this to gain muscle mass: consume 1-2grams of protein per pound of body weight. So if you weigh 150lbs, eat a minimum of 150grams of protein a day. But it's not protein alone, you need adequate carbs. The term used for the diet is 'high protein, high carb.' In other words, you have to eat a lot and workout a lot, doing max weight to fatigue a few times a week. Unfortunately, I don't know the biology/chemistry behind any of this.

simon666
Basically, protein drinks help one supplement protein intake in a quick, easy manner. One can down a protein drink with 50grams of protein in a few minutes. That's a third or quarter of one's daily intake in a quick amount of time.

Binro the Heretic
Does your body absorb it more quickly or easily?

Is there a limit to how much protein your digestive system can put into your blood at one time?

Is there a chance most of the powder you gulp down just passes through without being digested at all?

Rodents of Unusual Size
Green spiriluna/green veggie powder is good if you have a cold. Really helps me whenever I get one.

Hemp vanilla flavored powder is also delicious with shakes. It's more of a texture thing for me, I like the powders because they make for a good snack over say something loaded with a bunch of sugar and hydrogenated oils.

Synthol scares me, it's revolting. Not sure if he's done it but I hope not.

simon666
Binro, those are good questions. I can only answer with folk reasoning.

Your question might suitably be applied to any food: steak, fish, corn, rice, etc. Insofar as our intuition would say no about the above, that our body can absorb most whatever 'real food' we consume at it, I think it's fair, albeit possibly wrong, to say that the body doesn't fail to absorb whey protein any differently than any other food substance we're consuming. Another folky counter example: alcohol. Our body seems pretty capable of moving alcohol from the gut to the blood in high quantities. Probably the same holds for proteins.

(A bio-chemist should probably chime in here) The issue is likely whether amino acids the proteins provide can all be used by the muscle cells repairing/growing. Maybe yes, maybe no. I think the body builder diet is one caution: eat perhaps more than you need to make sure your muscles have the building blocks to grow as much as they can.

Regarding different kinds of protein, I think the professional body builders like whey protein because it provides most if not all of the necessary amino acids that are used in muscle production. Again, I'm not a bio-chemist, so I might be too fuzzy here.

There is hard science on some of the supplements body builders use. I haven't looked for a number of years, but in Google Scholar there are peer reviewed articles that speak to benefits of Creatine for increasing muscle mass and for increasing time to fatigue/exhaustion, for instance.

If you're not taking roids and stabbing synthol into your body, it really just comes down to working your muscles really hard and eat a lot of everything so your body has all of the raw materials it needs to in order to not be restrained in that regard.

hammsangwich
I've heard you can get kidney stones from taking too much whey protein.

As for if supplements work, I use the pre-workout powders and it definitely helps me, especially in the morning. You get really buzzed and feel like you can work out for hours. I think some people died from them.

spikestoyiu
You think they make fun of the one guy who wears his baseball cap the right way?
garcet71283
When that guy gets old and flabby, that tatoo is going to get all squished together and that makes me happy
StanleyPain
Before he gets old the synthol in his arms will start to breakdown and it will look like his arms are wrapped in droopy sacks of bacon or something.

misterbuns
dead at 40 from thrombosis

ahem. sorry.

from thomBROsis

infinite zest
More like TROMbonesis

Simillion
Supermutants drinking radioactive waste inside of a vault

blue vein steel
made me lol. 5

misterbuns
Our great grandparents would not consider us human.

M-DEEM
I was thinking that too until I saw Eveready Harton. 5 for vault mutants


Corpus Delectable
375lb DUMBBELL

Also, there's a weight on the floor.
Jack Dalton
Your stars

Rodents of Unusual Size
and some ghost stars because HA!

****

Jet Bin Fever
This is another great comment.

Accidie
YOU WIN

Gmork
Pop them with a pin.
Prickly Pete
I almost feel like you're walking right into someone saying, "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

EvilHomer
I thought you weren't into popping?

Hooker
This is a million times more embarrassing a hobby/obsession than furries or bronies or you name it.
Rodents of Unusual Size
I don't think most bodybuilders approach synthol, though.

oddeye
Combined weight of posters shitting on this man's hard-earned pure muscle power is less than one of these bad boy's left nut. 375lbs is like lifting half a car.

Fuck yall, I love being strong.
Chancho
My huge balls are rich with child-producing seed and my semen is full of mood-elevating compounds. I laugh at your puny cat balls!

EvilHomer
It's a valid point. Strong-shaming is the misandronistic equivalent of slut-shaming. If Mr Piana is a jerk and a snake-oil salesman then I think we can justify our disdain (this is why I asked for context earlier, to find out if it was OK to dislike him); however, it is important to step back sometimes and remember that not all body-builders are bad people. Muscular-Americans have feelings, too!

Binro the Heretic
I would be just as critical of a woman who did "anything it took" to look beautiful.

My criticism springs from a combination of disdain and pity.

EvilHomer
See, I wouldn't. It's her life, her body, her choice - subjectively speaking, I would have a different reaction towards her depending on whether "anything it took" wound up making her look like Bianca Beauchamp (nice!), or like Jocelyn Wildenstein (argh!). But ultimately, it's great that they're doing what they love, and in a strange way, it's admirable that they're so committed to their dreams.

EvilHomer
What if these were nerds downing brain-supplements and solving really difficult math theorems with no calculators, just a marker and whiteboard? Would we pity them then?

Binro the Heretic
I reserve my right to criticize people doing stupid shit and defend your right to criticize me for doing so.

Accidie
I wouldn't ever be just as critical of a woman who did "anything it took" to look beautiful. Or any guy for that matter.

If you think these gentleman look good then you need your head examined.

Jet Bin Fever
I wish I had a way to see what these assholes look like in 20-30 years (or however long before their hearts give out)
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