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Desc:a glowing bottle to calculate your daily water goal
Tags:water, hoax?, kickstarter
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Comment count is 28
This is so "first world problem" it's ridiculous.
I have something better, it's called a Nalgene. It's translucent so I just look at it to see how much water I have drank. When I've drank one full bottle, I make a mental note, fill up the bottle and then finish that. Once I have determined I have drank two bottles, I feel satisfied that I've drank enough water for the day. If I still feel thirsty at any point after that, I will drink more water.
Lawyer-up, fucker.

I get the joke (and it's fantastic), but I don't understand the punchline.
This is not possibly real, right? The asian lady auditioning for SNL seems to have an actual business background.

infinite zest
"The Battery lasts for over a year, so you'll never have to charge it." Total joke, but something like this could be good for tracking fluid intake for people who may not have the cognitive functions to do it themselves. These folks are very at risk for dehydration and aspiration and due to caregiving staff who often phone it in, don't get a necessary required set number, it's just written down as if they did.

There are medications that kill your sense of thirst as well.

Oscar Wildcat
The punchline is that this product is designed to attract venture capital. That it is useless for it's intended purpose is irrelevant: it makes all the right dog whistles and connects with the current trend in sports fitness and wearable computer tech. Plus, asian girl you want to fuck.

I'm sure they'll all make lots of money here, just as I am sure you'll never see this product in the physical world being used.

All that said, it is true that a great many people are so disconnected from their bodies and eat so poorly that they don't get enough water. The solution for most people is to actually, you know, drink water with a meal rather than coffee, wine or beer.

infinite zest
Well to be fair, beer and coffee still have water in it, but it's no substitute, trust me. The person I work with will not drink regular water so we do cool aid, which I doubt is that much better overall than drinking 72 ounces of beer because of the sugar, save for the health problems associated with drinking 72 ounces of beer every day..

But yeah.. some people just need some sort of "app" or "thing," I was dating this girl who had one of those little wristbands that tells you how many steps you've taken.. to me I'm like "who cares? You can easily tell how many miles you've walked" but it makes her feel better to know that she met a goal of 10,000 steps or whatever as if 9,999 wasn't enough. But she's also the kind of person who steps on the scale 10 times a day and freaks out if it says one half pound heavier..

John Holmes Motherfucker
>>I'm like "who cares? You can easily tell how many miles you've walked"

Not really, unless you walk the same place everyday. Tracking your steps makes it easier to reach your goal anywhere, and to work it into every day task. The only thing that ever helped me lose weight was walking 10 thousand steps a day with a pedometer, but all of a sudden the pedometers became shit, one after another would stop working after a week and a half. I guess it was so they could sell me a wrist thing.

Instead I installed "Google Fit", an application that uses my phone to count my steps. I love it.

Bottom line: If I had one of those ridiculous bottles I'd probably drink more water. Clearly, I'm an idiot, but I'm not the only one. I think the real issue is affordability. I suspect that I'll buy the cheap knockoff that'll be in Big Lots ten years from now.

infinite zest
Yeah I'm not saying she's crazy or anything for using it; I have my weird quirks too. My bike commute to work is always the same Iron Maiden song Rime of the Ancient Mariner, because it's 13 minutes, and if I'm off it kinda ruins my vibe for the rest of the day.

John Holmes Motherfucker
Well, obviously you weren't saying she's crazy, I'm just saying it's got practical advantages, because you can do your daily 10K anywhere , in any interval.

Best music for biking: Velvet Underground, Sister Ray. It's a miracle I didn't kill myself. I named myself after that song.

infinite zest
Heh.. Back when I worked at a bar my "last call" song was Sister Ray every night so people wouldn't be pissed about not hearing their songs on the jukebox.

So, are you not allowed to drink anything not out of the bottle, or do you have to manually enter all your cups of coffee into your phone? I did like how they played up that you have to take the bottle everywhere with you like it's a selling point.

This is the most convoluted, expensive, and cumbersome solution to a non-problem that I've ever seen.

Here's an idea: every time you piss, drink a little more water than the amount you just whizzed in the toilet.
The Mothership
Are you aware, sir, that our computer program tells you not only when you need milk, but also when you need eggs?
Tough American Bouncer
"Battery last for over a year, so you never have to charge it." Wait, what? Also, don't we get most of our water from the food anyways?
You'll only be alive for another year because you've spent all of your money on stupid shit like this and you can no longer afford food.

John Holmes Motherfucker
Or maybe you8'll lose weight?

John Holmes Motherfucker
I once read something from Tony Robbins about the importance of water in our food, and he says something like: " Only two kinds of food are a good source of water: Fruits and vegetables" And I'm thinking: "What about soup?"

Dead people are pretty thin.

I'm making a smart plastic bag that communicates with your phone. When you haven't breathed enough air from the bag, the phone alerts you.
This is like the first Amazon delivery drone commercial. As in: it is filmed in such a way that if people react poorly they can say it was a joke, but if investors start sending them money they don't have to change it.
infinite zest
Yeah.. this seems like a joke but I sometimes have no choice but to watch Shark Tank at work and I've seen way dumber ideas than this get millions of dollars invested into it. Just dumb shit like this. The one good one was a doctor's "cadaver" which could be cut apart just like a real one for med school and such, and they shot it down. That's a good idea!! Operating on real bodies might be seen as essential because you'll eventually be doing it anyway, but the idea of operating on a dead one seems so antiquated to me. Oh well, not good enough for THA TANK, YO!

infinite zest
I mean, you wouldn't use real cadavers instead of crash test dummies, right?

Well, they use cadavers to design certain tests and machines.

It's probably as much a practicality/expense thing as anything else...getting fresh corpses for ever test, having doctors do a thorough autopsy on every body after every test, etc, etc.

I have seen the future. It is stupid.
Jet Bin Fever
Do like my dad told me before tennis camp, drink till your pee is clear. Done!
The Mothership
Yup, more water in, more water out.

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