|infinite zest |
Hmm. I wonder if falling out of a tree would work for this head cold I feel coming on.. only one way to find out I guess.
Remember kids, death is the ultimate adventure, and calamity is just how God gives us kisses!
Heaven Is Totes 4 Realz - The Movie
|Miss Henson's 6th grade class |
Uh, where else do miracles come from, smart guy?
God's Not Dead 2 is coming out the Friday after this does, which is April Fools Day. That's kind of like a miracle.
At this point they could probably re-release The Gods Must Be Crazy and trick people into seeing it.
I guess after the success of no budget B cast hastily produced evangelical-themed movies like God's Not Dead and War Room big studios like Sony and semi-reputable actors have decided they want a piece of that action.
I didn't see it and have no intention to, but at least God's Not Dead brought some theological discussion into the mix not unlike some lecture you might get in a Philosophy (or Theology) class in college. Of course God comes out on top, but it's a new perspective that a lot of Christian families may not have gotten unless maybe if they're Episcopalian. This just looks like an overpriced Lifetime miracle movie with a little extra bit of christianity thrown in.
I was flipping through "Heaven Is for Real" when I landed in a section toward the end of the book. The kid was dropping more details about his visit to the celestial plane, only this time daddy was growing terrified and on edge. See, the little boy was describing visions of the war between God and Satan that's totally about to happen very soon, before we know it, like tomorrow, you fence-sitting heathen. Daddy frantically grabbed his Bible and turned to Revelation. "Did you see this!?" he asked in a panic. "Yes," the son answered. "Well, what about this!?" Yes, the son answered.
At that point I closed the book and walked away. Something about that passage didn't sit right with me. It reminded me of those stupid "Left Behind" books that were all the rage among the Christian students when I was in high school.
Look, I'm an Agnostic. I am open to the possibility of something beyond this. At the same time, I understand that Christians are more convinced than ever their literal end of the world scenario/reward is coming, thus making it the easiest time in history to sell them crap. So your little girl fell out of a tree and God healed her terrible disease. Okay. Maybe that did happen. Maybe she will be the next Alex Malarkey.
Probably not more convinced than ever. In the 1800s Americans went on a nation wide rapture binge known as "The Great Disappointment". They gathered in wide robes to await ascendance on a specific day and time. One guy jumped off his roof, convinced he would be brought up, and broke his legs. Plus, those Christians Jesus originally told they would be ruptured within their lifetime were probably pretty confident. It's been 2000 years of 'any day now' since.
Wow. Holy shit you were not making that up. 'The Great Disappointment' sounds like something a satirist would come up with, but no, it happened and was really called that.
|Sexy Duck Cop |
All of these movies could be summed up with "If you're so smart, cure your fucking daughter through prayer and intuition. Oh look. Nothing happened."
|Sexy Duck Cop |
Also, why is God chucking white kids left and right into death just so they can say "Yup, I died. Had a bunch of generic imagery rubbed in my face. Clouds, harpsichords, etc. It was way worse than Hell."
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