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Category:Business, Fashion
Tags:bunghole, puns, New England, moichendizing, Yankee ingenuity
Submitted:Old_Zircon
Date:12/04/15
Views:584
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Comment count is 13
chumbucket
To save you some time: on the corner of Herbert and Derby Street downtown Salem.
Mon-Sat 8a-11pm and 12-8pm on Sunday.
infinite zest
Woah that's late for a liquor store! Due to my work hours if I want bourbon I have to go get it at like 10 in the morning and I always feel like they're judging me, so I kinda stopped drinking hard liquor. But at least in Oregon you can buy beer and wine and malt liquor from 7AM to 2:30AM, so it's not that bad. The worst was when I was living in Wisconsin, where the cutoff time for sales of all alcohol (excluding bars) is 9PM.

chumbucket
Yeah it is. The place just to the end of my street is open usually until 9:30 at night. Which works OK for me. 5-6pm is usually rush hour in there and it's usually stuffed with Natty Light 40 drinkers and the occasional fake ID user who has a tissy fit when carded. I'd rather avoid all that drama and shop when the place is most likely to get held up.

Old_Zircon
IZ, Oregon doesn't count. You guys don't even know how to jay walk.

infinite zest
That's funny, I was getting home this morning and jaybiked because there were no cars coming, and realized where I was, right outside the Portland Police headquarters, with probably 50 cop cars right in front of me. I was like "aw shit" because most of them had cops inside, but nobody seemed to care.

infinite zest
er.. maybe not 50 but enough to take up two entire city blocks parked on the curb.. Lots of cops anyway. :)

yogarfield
Shirt #4, to go please.
duck&cover
Oh, this is Bunghole LIQUORS? Sorry, my mistake.
infinite zest
Heh.. didn't get that at first. There's a street here called Couch St, but it's pronounced "Cooch" (named after John H. Couch and not the thing you sit on) but I've never seen a liquor store anywhere on that street.

Speaking of puns that I'm not sure are intentional, my girlfriend lives across the street from a Pho place, which is actually across the street from another Pho place. Y'all probably know this but Pho is pronounced "Fuh", and the restaurant is Pho Kim. Say it fast or say it slow, still sounds like you're saying "fuck him."

chumbucket
They should sell rubber balls as well and advertise that proudly.

Old_Zircon
My favorite is/was a series of overpriced, yuppie antique shops in Brookline Village that are all variants of puns on the phrase "Room with a view" except using the word "vieux." Which, of course, means the puns only make sense if you pronounce the French with a very thick American accent. It's just a perfect example of accidental self-satire.

infinite zest
Yeah there's a ton of punny names of places here, Built to Grill, Kim Jong Grill, Thai Pod, a doggie daycare center named Virginia Woof, the list goes on and on but it's like an episode of Bob's Burgers. The city even used tax money to re-erect a big old sign from a Chinese place that hasn't been in the same location since the 90s called Hung Far Low. Yes, some of our city taxes went to a dick joke.

I'm not sure if Pho Kim is in on the joke though. It's a pretty concentrated area of the city that hasn't been hipsterfied yet and is mostly punk rock venues and asian food markets and Bahn Mi that's 4 dollars instead of 12 (like it should be) called the Jade District (a little racist) because most of the population doesn't speak English as a primary language. So as a hipster I feel kinda bad for wanting to go in there just to see if they say " welcome to fuck him" but I do like Pho.

Stopheles
In Connecticut they'd have to be named Bunghole Package.
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