|Oscar Wildcat |
The White Man's Burden, so effortlessly borne! He bagged quite a trophy out on safari in the Colonies, all other departments green with envy! Her face gracing some future coinage only old money and entitlement can mint.
OK, sure, the guy did her a solid. I get that. But there's just so much more going on here.
"... I love her."
long, awkward pause
It was nice of him, though. I don't begrudge rich old men their fun, at least when the girls they help get so much out of it. I mean, if this young lady had been discovered by someone like Alan Dershowitz, let's say, she would not be graduating from Yale - she'd be serving drinks on Jeffrey Epstein's Loli-island Express.
The two problems I have with this are, 1) being reminded of how shit my life is, and 2) the transparent phoniness of the philanthropic class. (PHONIES!) Yes, there are plenty of bright, talented Third Worlders running around campus, but most of them were born into absurd privilege already, and Choate in particular has long had a reputation for being the ESA's "party school".
Actually, belay that. Dershowitz would have probably sent her to Deerfield, which would have been far worse.
It was an old Colonial scheme to take a local face, duke them in to the elite, then turn them back out to take a leadership position. She may love Kenya, but when the old boys come calling, she knows which side of the toast has the marmalade. It's not even conscious. Tea time, dearie. Fetch us a plate please.
But that's still only a single carry-on to this eight piece luggage set to be unpacked. BTW, I'd be surprised if any actual hanky panky went on like what we are joking about. It did bother me though that what a real mentor will say when asked that last question is "I feel about her that she is my daughter" and it's very clear to all who care. And she could say about him that she loves him, and it's OK because children will occasionally feel that way about their parents, real or adopted. His actual answer had a strong whiff of the Woody Allen to it.
EvilHomer is a fun handle and how I know you now, but really you should come up with something new using Holden Caufield as the root. Anything less would be...phony!
It's the pause, before and after, plus the look on his face which reveals the method. And yeah, the establishment is very much into getting Western-educated rulers into power. Little known fact: the reigning King of Jordan is a goddamn Deerfielder, which probably explains why the Middle East is in such a bad state right now.
On the other hand, I guess it wouldn't be so bad to have a seal prize winner ruling Kenya on behalf of foreign banking, oil, and pharmaceutical interests. She's extremely intelligent and very studious; to give you some comparison, the United State's most beloved president, JFK himself, very nearly flunked out when he was there.
How about "Choad Hall". Portmanteau of Choate and Toad Hall.
"Choad" was a frequent joke, yes, especially amongst the townies.
Other jokes include: a reference in "Catcher in the Rye" (one of the phonies went to CRH), a namedrop during an episode of 'Family Guy" (in which a yuppie who stole Stewie's favorite toy implies Choaties like to fuck dogs), and a local meme which involves running over students with your car. You might also enjoy checking out the UrbanDictionary entry for the school, which is filled to bursting with insufferable preppies, passive-aggressively shit-talking one another. Here's a sample:
"Choate may be well-known around the world, but only because so many people go there, i.e. the 26% acceptance rate. Choate’s successes are not counted in their alumni or academic honors, but in the number of hot dogs consumed on average daily in the dining hall ... Regardless of the socio-economic standard discipline is lacking."
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