|Killer Joe |
Goddamn, I love slow-motion-super-compliant-non-struggling-student bullshit like this.
Sounds like "killer" joe is butt-hurt from trying to attack a ninja with two of his friends.
Sexy Duck Cop
This reminds me of the part in the Bible where God commands Moses to attack a ninja with two of his friends. The ninja slowly pushes Moses and his friends over so he can sit on them, and God is mightily pleased.
|Oscar Wildcat |
Goddamn those ninjers and their ninjitsus!
I replaced "legit" with "ninjers" for you.
This reminds me of that Akido video from years ago where the master was throwing students around the mat as if they weighed nearly nothing, and hitting them with 'energy'.
The only major difference between this and a furpile is the costumes and repression.
|Two Jar Slave |
I did ninjutsu for about three years and, let me tell you, even if you have a level head, a good attitude, and the best intentions, there's just no avoiding the pseudo-cult aspects of this martial art. I did other Japanese martial arts before, like karate (great for fitness!) and aikido (great for flexibility and happiness!), so I have a stable point of reference. The instructors are creepy and controlling. The "masters" are globetrotting charlatans steeped in bullshit myths they invent about themselves. At some point, someone's going to try to fuck you. Even by the standards of Americanized martial arts, Ninjutsu is in a class of its own as a money-grubbing cult.
The worst part is it doesn't even make you fit or happy.
i knew a dude who took ninjer classes for years and whenever we'd "spar" at no point was he ever able to counter basic folkstyle wrestling moves. as soon as I would break his stance, it was over
bujinkan is a long-con for weeaboos and LARPers
Two Jar Slave
Yup, this too. At least Aikido and Tai Chi make you feel good--ninjutsu is borderline useless as a self-defence and promotes hostility, arrogance, and paranoia.
speaking of hostility, arrogance, and paranoia, at one point they got wind that this guy had showed me a few basics from the class, got all bent out of shape, and demanded that I go down and talk to them. i didn't.
bujinkan is the worst
|Mr. Purple Cat Esq. |
Isnt krav maga the no-bullshit, just *hurt* people martial art?
Sexy Duck Cop
There are some good Krav Maga schools out there, but in general, a lot of those "no bullshit" Reality-Based Self Defense (RBSD) schools are every bit as ridiculous as their mystical, psuedo-Oriental brethren. A lot of them get way too excited about hyperviolent Mortal Kombat Meets Story Of Ricky techniques that are virtually impossible to train. Instead of "A guy grabs my lapel and I do a ridiculously complicated wrist lock on him", it's "a guy grabs my lapel and I tear his throat out with my bare hands".
Either way, the move is unworkable in real life, so you can't spar with it and have to rely entirely on the power of your imagination. It encourages the same cultist mentality (a shocking number of these instructors pull the "I was a Navy SEAL and a Green Beret" card) and is functionally no better than the pro-bullshit arts.
This guy has a great imagination. "I took all three knives." You sure did.
|Jet Bin Fever |
Only works against manly hugs.
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