|TeenerTot - 2016-06-21 |
What the fuck is this?
Jurassic Park with cowboys.
I thought that was Cowboys Vs Dinosaurs.
|DriverStabby - 2016-06-21 |
Well, I'm glad to see Ed Harris is working. He was alright.
|Robin Kestrel - 2016-06-21 |
Makes about as much sense as having a "Terminator" TV series, but, whatever.
|memedumpster - 2016-06-21 |
Shut it off at the letters "JJ Abrams."
Five for yet another slickly polished but completely unwatchable modern tv show.
Oof, I'm still cringing when they gave the Lost makeover to The Prisoner remake mini-series.
This "golden age of television" thing is seriously overrated. I am starting to discern the formula with shows people have gotten me to watch, and I hate it.
1.) Spent 1-12 episodes with strong character development.
2.) Secret Cylon* the plot to a mushy zero character oblivion.
3.) Create new TV show.
* Throw all character development in the toilet and erase the previous episodes by playing the random bad guy infiltrator game like Battlestar Rebootica and Agents of H.Y.D.R.A.
I bet you this show has humans who are actually robots, or robots who are actually humans, or it will once that whole character development arc shit gets too hard to write.
1. Set up intriguing "what the hell is going on?" mystery. "What is the monster?" "What is this French radio signal?" "Why is there an invisible dome over the town?" "How did a boat get out into the desert?"
2. Have the first two episodes be mostly about this mystery
3. Spend the next several years padding it out with boring soap opera bullshit and string people along just enough with 2 minutes of the mystery at the end of each episode. You have plenty of time to make up whatever bullshit as you go along.
4. When the time comes to finally explain it at the finale, fall back to "time loop bubbles".
YUP! My god, yup.
"Why do we have no memories as the suddenly awakened crew of an outer space warship heading towards this planet where everyone says we were bringing them weapons? Well, we're sure not bringing them weapons or even were supposed to be at this planet..."
Fuck you, Dark Matter.
Is there a third kind of tv show?
It wasn't even "time loop bubbles" it was "oh, it was all a dream/death hallucination/etc." which is the laziest fucking thing TV ever invented.
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