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Desc:Testing if a dog will get help for a trapped owner. 28 dogs tested, all with the same results...
Category:Pets & Animals, Accidents & Explosions
Tags:dog, ACTING!, loyalty, bookcase, screw you human
Submitted:Adjuvant
Date:06/25/16
Views:1084
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Comment count is 37
SolRo
"Lady, I know fetch, sit, lay down, heel and stay. You never said anything about this 'get help' shit"
Caminante Nocturno
In the dog's defense, she was not putting up a convincing act. She sounded more annoyed that hurt or scared.
jangbones
Genuinely surprised none of the dogs started eating their owner.
Old_Zircon
You're thinking of cats. Dogs whose owners die often starve to death rather than eating their master's body. Cats start while it's still warm. Cats +1.


Anyhow, we have some kind of "scientists prove the obvious" tag, right?

Could use an "ACTING!" too.

bawbag
My first thought was how a cat would simply be at your face -upon your dying- trying to decide on which eyeball to eat first now that you've 'decided' not to bring them crunchies and wet food, but honestly knowing cats there's no way they'd wait that long.

Gmork
5 for the evil of retarded cat hate

memedumpster
None of these people are dead. Dogs eat their dead owners as much as cats.

Old_Zircon
"Gmork
5 for the evil of retarded cat hate"

I can't speak for anyone else but I love cats. It's just a fact that they'll eat you as soon as they can. They start with the lips and earlobes.

matlock
Love cats and dogs both, but my heart goes out to any oppressed species. Humans, however, can fuck right off.

EvilHomer
You can tell who here has been watching GoT and who here hasn't.

bawbag
Gmork, I used to work for a Cat charity and have lived with plenty of them in my life. There's zero hatred of cats here, I assure you but they are obligate carnivores and the facts speak for themselves, they will eat you.

http://journals.lww.com/amjforensicmedicine/Abstract/1994/0600 0/Postmortem_Injuries_by_Indoor_Pets_.4.aspx

Old_Zircon
I've never seen or read GoT and don't particularly expect to any time soon.

I learned everything I know about animal damage to corpses from someone who was getting a forensics degree and posted interesting facts from their textbooks on PoE Red back in 2000 or so.


Also this, but mostly PoE:
https://www.amazon.com/Dead-Men-Tell-Tales-Anthropologist/dp/0 385479689

Scattersane
I love cats. I love that cats will eat you. Keeps you on your toes, encourages you to stay alive. I'll bet that's why they're sacred creatures.

BHWW
"Not only in agony and death is the cat a reminder of the brutish Past. In his anger cries and in his love cries, the gliding course through the grass, the hunger that burns shamelessly from his slitted eyes, in all his movements and actions is advertised his kinship with the wild, his tamelessness, and his contempt for man.

Inferior to the dog the cat is, nevertheless, more like human beings than is the former. For he is vain yet servile, greedy yet fastidious, lazy, lustful and selfish. That last characteristic is, indeed, the dominant feline trait. He is monumentally selfish. In his self love he is brazen, candid and unashamed.

Giving nothing in return, he demands everything--he demands it in a raspy, hungry, whining squall that seems to tremble with self-pity, and accuse the world at large of perfidy and broken contract. His eyes are suspicious and avaricious, the eyes of a miser. His manner is at once arrogant and debased. He arches his back and rubs himself against humanity's leg, dirging a doleful plea, while his eyes glare threats and his claws slide convulsively in and out of their padded sheaths.

He is inordinate in his demands, and he gives no thanks for bounty. His only religion is an unfaltering belief in the divine rights of cats. The dog exists only for man, man exists only for cats. The introverted feline conceives himself to be ever the center of the universe. In his narrow skull there is no room for the finer feelings.

Pull a drowning kitten out of the gutter and provide him with a soft cushion to sleep upon, and cream as often as he desires. Shelter, pamper and coddle him all his useless and self-centered life. What will he give you in return? He will allow you to stroke his fur; he will bestow upon you a condescending purr, after the manner of one conferring a great favor. There the evidences of gratitude end. Your house may burn over your head, thugs may break in, rape your wife, knock Uncle Theobald in the head, and string you up by your thumbs to make you reveal the whereabouts of your hoarded wealth. The average dog would die in the defense even of Uncle Theobald. But your fat and pampered feline will look on without interest; he will make no exertions in your behalf, and after the fray, will, likely as not, make a hearty meal off your unprotected corpse."

bawbag
BHWW I wish I had more stars to give *****

BHWW
It's from an essay on cats by none other than Robert E. Howard:

http://users.rcn.com/shogan/howard/thoughts/beast.htm

which he capped off with:

"The life of a cat is not numbered by nine. Usually it is short, violent and tragic. He suffers, and makes others suffer if he can. He is primitive, bestially selfish. He is, in short, a creature of awful and terrible potentialities, a crystalization of primordial self-love, a materialization of the blackness and squalor of the abyss. He is a green-eyed, steel-thewed, fur-clad block of darkness hewed from the Pits which know not light, nor sympathy, nor dreams, nor hope, nor beauty, nor anything except hunger and the satiating of hunger. But he has dwelt with man since the beginning, and when the last man lies down and dies, a cat will watch his throes, and likelier than not, will gorge its abysmal hunger on his cooling flesh."

Oscar Wildcat
"The snarl of a panther is certainly more dangerous than the snarl of a dog, but it isn’t ugly. A cat’s rage is beautiful, burning with a pure cat flame, all its hair standing up and crackling blue sparks, eyes blazing and sputtering. But a dog’s snarl is ugly, a redneck lynch-mob Paki-basher snarl…snarl of someone got a “Kill a Queer for Christ” sticker on his heap, a self-righteous occupied snarl. When you see that snarl you are looking at something that has no face of its own. A dog’s rage is not his. It is dictated by his trainer. And lynch-mob rage is dictated by conditioning."
—William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside

baleen
dogs can smell research, didn't they know that?
Boomer The Dog
I'm glad that people still have the memories of Lassie enough that they can call this video the Lassie Effect and viewers will understand what it is.

I was just barking with a Dog fanatic about Lassie last week, after he told me that downloads of the TV show are available on a locker site, otherwise it's rare online. The TV show was a part of people's lives for several decades of early TV, but it seems like it hasn't been on the air for years.

It's part of my life to a point, I'd watch it after school, and there was also a series called Jeff's Collie too. I called myself Lassie for a little while too as a nickname.

Boomer
EvilHomer
That's a good point, Boomdog. I knew about Lassie when I was a little kid, mostly through references in other media, and later, reruns on Nick at Nite (which is where I learned about things like The Munsters, I Dream of Jeanie, and how hot Mary Tyler Moore was). However, I don't think I've heard one word about Lassie in at least a decade, maybe two. There was a somewhat-recent allussion to the show in GTAV, but I can't recall if Lassie was named explicitly (I don't believe it was)

Do kids today know who Lassie is? Is Lassie now a forgotten relic of the past, like Wanda Jackson or Varney the Vampire?

EvilHomer
By that tocken, I think that RinTinTin was mostly forgotten by the time I was a kid, and nowadays , the position of Most Famous Celebrity Dog has been taken from Lassie by Air Bud. Perhaps Air Bud is already where Lassie was twenty years ago, and somedoggie else - Stan from DwaB, maybe? - is coming to challenge him. I guess that's the way of the world; time marches on, dogs are forgotten, new dogs arise to take their place.

BillLumbergh
i like you

Old_Zircon
Yeah, I used to catch it on Nick at Night sometimes but I hadn't even considered that it might be hard to see now. I thought it was well enough embedded into our national consciousness tat it would be around in some way for the forseeable future. I mean shit, you can still watch something like Andy Griffith easily enough.

Old_Zircon
Also I'm glad to see you're still around, Boomer! We hadn't heard from you in a while.

Caminante Nocturno
Just when you think he's here for good...

A while back, I'm talking almost 20 years ago at least, the Smithsonian had the shirt worn by the actor who played Timmy on display at the American History Museum. I grew up watching Lassie on Nickelodeon too, so it was a nice surprise to see it there.

TeenerTot
"Oh, god. You were seven hundred dollars! Get help!"
Old_Zircon
This is exactly the level of usefulness I'd expect from a purebred.

Anaxagoras
I have two purebreds. (Akitas) They are indeed useless.

TeenerTot
Also, The only time I've seen a dog "get help" is when my mom's older dog would come get us to tattle that the puppy was doing something bad.
dairyqueenlatifah
Dogs are a little smarter than that. This act wouldn't fool a toddler with downs.
Gmork
Bingo.

bawbag
In fairness, that is spot on as dogs tend to react pretty strongly to actual fear/panic where the dog in this video is not concerned -possibly- because the acting is so terrible.

We're not convinced of it, why should a dog be?

Killer Joe
"You hold up, there's like a million things I need to smell here!"
I wonder if they would act different in a familiar space?
animegurl1000
That's what I was thinking. They might get different results if they re-try this where the dog lives.

bawbag
...or with an owner, experiencing actual distress along with the real pheromone response to genuine fear.

bawbag
...not that I think the dog will fetch Mr McGonigle to get you out of the well, but yeah I think the dog in the video isn't possibly the most representative sampling.

DriverStabby
The dog could tell she was being fake as fuck.
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