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Desc:From the director of Skyscraper and Y2K
Category:Classic Movies, Trailers
Tags:Robots, 90s, PoeTV Monday Night RAW, t-force, robits
Submitted:Old_Zircon
Date:09/26/16
Views:590
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Comment count is 16
zurf
Looks almost as bad as Cyber Tracker 2
Old_Zircon
The director went on to direct Skyscraper.

memedumpster
I will now 100% accurately predict the debates so you guys don't have to watch it, and can hang out with us instead.

Trump : I put forth, America, that humans are beings of intelligence which are made of atoms, and therefore the mechanics of intelligence must have their origin in the common laws of physics known to define the nature of atoms, while my opponent believes in a metaphysical transcendental outer-determinism-

Clinton : Now hold on there, Donald, I never made any argument from metaphysics, only that the internal state of chemistry that gives rise to intelligence and consciousness could be part of a higher order causal plateau that has an emergent determinism outside the level of the standard rules of chemistry.

Trump : "Causal plateau," was that in Kant or Doonesbury?

*audience laughs*

Clinton : You mean Outland, you cultural hack?

Trump : Seriously though, folks, I think what we can agree on is that science needs more funding to better understand our common, perhaps crystallized, human condition.

*Hillary nods along*

Trump : Because this atomic determinism needs to be understood, since it is key to understanding human nature and solving our problems.

Holt : Secretary Clinton, you once said 'that whatever can be said of a human being, a human being is greater.' In light of atomic determinism's role in what you call a plateau of intelligence, do you still hold to this?

Clinton : Well, that's a tough one, Lester, because we rely on our capacity to measure and explain things to gain consistent knowledge, and as my opponent points out, you can easily stray into metaphysics, but I don't see a ready contradiction in admitting that our methods are sound even if the dataset of our knowledge is incomplete.

*Trump nods*

Trump : The very fact that we're broadcasting this debate in light to the world is a sign that our methods are generating knowledge.

Clinton : So when we look at an election cycle we need to make clear that this could be a mere act of physics, or it could be a higher order of physics that remains untapped by examining particles instead of human composites of chemistry.

Trump : Look at our mental healthcare, it's a shambles, we need more biologists and less drug dealers in this industry.

Clinton : And if the voters are tired of war as much as we all seem to be, they must come to see the role of entropy and thermodynamics in our international conflicts, as well as our decision making process as political entities.

Holt : Mister Trump, how would you best, in as few words as possible, define the difference between your and Miss Clinton's vision for America.

Trump : One word, Laurence : Fusion. Right now, there is a fusion plant superproject going on outside the United States that will have every American paying a foreign light bill by 2056. That is unacceptable, we need our own fusion plant. Hell, they said that-

Holt : Brevity is the soul of wit, Mister Trump, Secretary Clinton, how about you?

Trump : I wasn't trying to be funny, Lester.

Clinton : Solar. Fusion is a nice feather in your hat if you're a group of scientists from smaller European countries, but we need solutions now. Fusion's potential safety concerns are unexplored, and the technology completely experiminental.

Trump : You cannot look at the gestalt of mathematics and their absolute technical consistency and say the formulas for fusion are unexplored.

Clinton : My opponent loves to rely on neo-Kantian-

Trump : That is just offensive, seriously.

Clinton : -rejection of the supremacy of empiricism over a priori knowledge. His campaign was rife with it.

Trump : Lester, can I speak?

Clinton : It's like he never heard of Einstein.

Trump : Oh my god, Lester? Seriously?

Holt : Very interesting, but we need to take a break for our sponsors, and we'll be back with Trump v Clinton in our first of many enlightening debates.

---

See you guys at the movies!
chumbucket
I completely enjoyed reading this while listening to the trailer in the background.

jfcaron_ca
I really wish we'd have this kind of debate in politics at any level. Actually it would be even better if it happened for like, a city council election.

memedumpster
JF, we is humans. If the discourse was this high so would ire, and the ire would continue.

We'd all hate Trump's reliance on Brownian motion to explain illegal immigration and we'd all be super sick of how much the South votes based on the candidates' cosmology. Clinton's lack of double-blind policy checksums would be ignored by most, and the rest would claim placebo effect.

The atoms, in their superset of ridiculous attractions, made us ridiculous.

Bort
stars for you and they are terrific

dairyqueenlatifah
That was great. I read the whole thing twice.

Two Jar Slave
That was the best.

Redford
Sure, you can have these.

Bisekrankas
I say! I even went through the trouble of logging in to give you these, and you all know how much I hate logging in.

Well played old sport!

bawbag
THESE STARS, GREAT STARS, THE BEST STARS ARE YOURS, BIGLY.

Old_Zircon
Other than leaving out the wax museum, meme's prediction was pretty much right.

Old_Zircon
I just realized that through sheer coincidence two of my three features tonight were distributed by PM Entertainment Group in 1994.
Bus_Aint_Comin
i'm always getting scheduled to work monday nights :(
That guy
Today is a good day to fart.
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