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Desc:An examination
Category:Educational
Tags:trauma, psychology, cynicism, cynic
Submitted:Rodents of Unusual Size
Date:12/03/16
Views:975
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Comment count is 26
unknown_specimen
you can't tell me what I think...
...
dad
chumbucket
Pink Floyd reference was as far as I needed to go. Stars.
Meerkat
I dunno man, I keep putting my trust in people and I keep getting screwed. My experience is that people will always eventually prove my trust misplaced. Even people you think are really good people can fuck you over without warning.

It isn't that I end up not trusting anyone, it's more that I trust people as long as I don't have to risk losing my shit if they aren't as trustworthy as I thought. So I will go to the bar with you and I will even pick up the tab, but if you start talking about snorting a line of coke off some cop's boots I'm bailing.
SolRo
Generally we will all screw over people that aren't blood relatives if the incentive is high enough.

Meerkat
Many of us will screw over blood relatives too.

SolRo
True dat.

SolRo
But usually the incentive has to be higher.

baleen
so russian

Two Jar Slave
Reckless optimism is the new cool.

Ninehells
Every dyed-in-the-wool cynic I've personally known has been a perpetual optimist trying to protect themselves against a pattern of disappointments.
Gmork
Bingo.

Xenocide
The truest and saddest thing.


Rodents of Unusual Size
I think the video for me is more about not placing so much doubt about anything good happening onto others. It's one thing to have reservations about trust in your own life, but I've witnessed what can happen when someone is so filled with the desire to crush other people's dreams with "reality" they don't see it as being a dick. And it is kind of a dick move. If someone else has a dream, who are we to shit on it, even if it is an unlikely one? Hope keeps people alive.

I've struggled with this issue most of my life. I became cynical at such a young age, I thought nothing good was possible at all. I was pretty devastated by hopelessness and cynicism throughout my 20s and I met plenty of lunatics. I also learned that I had to be more discerning. Part of realizing your own worth is realizing that you should look for people to be a part of your life only if they can demonstrate that they have self awareness, or respect you enough to listen to you. I let people into my life because I didn't know any better, and I was easily flattered, and too easily believed people cared about me when they didn't. This happened to me enough times so that I wanted to fall apart over it, but eventually I came away from it stronger, and with the realization that cynicism just didn't help me, and it wasn't any more helpful than being overwhelmingly naive. There's a middle ground in life, in being as objective as possible, and not beating yourself up for every failure, or every failing in people that you know that you let in. There are lines you draw and if people cross them, you can end the relationship without it crushing your view of humanity and for me this was a slow change.

I once met someone, a few years ago, who was so unaware of how his cynicism affected those around him but it was instantly obvious to me. And the overwhelming thing I felt after that was "that could have been me if I'd let it happen, if I'd filled myself up with all that negative energy and buried my ability to detect how others reacted to it". This guy was pushing away the reality of his impact. The urge to just give in and just assume the worst is like an addiction for me, and I had to stop it before it ate me alive and destroyed me on the inside, and when I saw this man it left me feeling so shocked but so alive at the same time. I felt sorry for his co-workers.

GravidWithHate
That's what's so amazingly frustrating about this video. It's so close to right. It makes the big mistake of assuming that cynicism is always a maladaptive response to personal trauma, rather than a fairly reasonable response to a world that loves to exploit people by playing on positive emotions.

Hazelnut
Yeah, a little cynicism is healthy. Constant cynicism as a defense mechanism is not, but that's true of constant ANYTHING.

15th
What a load of crap. Fuck you.
betamaxed
I felt bad for the clown man. This was a good video.
Waugh
The School of Life is both a You Tube channel and a real-life school (for adults) devoted to emotional education. We're fascinated by the sort of questions we're never taught enough about at regular school or college: How can relationships go well? What is meaningful work? How can love last? How can one find calm? What's gone wrong (and right) with capitalism?

We love the humanities, especially philosophy, psychotherapy, literature and art - always going to them in search of ideas that are thought-provoking, useful and consoling.

We're about wisdom, emotional intelligence and self-understanding.

We have 12 physical campuses around the world, a shop online and a blog, The Book of Life.
Xenocide
LEARNING IS BAD, ONE STAR.

Waugh
what's gone wrong (and right), with capitalism?


Old_Zircon
No, Waugh is right.

Waugh
we love the humanities

Old_Zircon
What I learned in this video:

-Out-groupers have nobody to blame but themselves
-Criticism of the dominant economic paradigm is a symptom of mental illness (and this is somehow relevant)
-unhappiness is a moral failing
-Accept the status quo without question


I know Pillager's vlogger thinks Laurie Penny is some kind of OMG REGRESSIVE LEFT demon but I'm still leaving this here because it is relevant:

http://thebaffler.com/blog/laurie-penny-self-care
bac
yeah the line about being upset at capatilism caught me off guard.
kinda can't trust anything that says if you don't like something the way it is then it's you that's wrong.

that is a damn damn fine article.

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