|John Holmes Motherfucker - 2018-01-22 |
Ah yes! I remeber January 21 2017, the day Trump ended all conflict and hardship in the US with a mighty blast of his heat vision!
Only nine days to Trump's first state of the Union, when he gets to take a break from the daily shitshow of blunders, dysfunction, obvious lies, and shit, to tell us how wonderfuk he is. I'm starting to wonder if it's possible to purchase insurance that pays in the event of your head exploding.
Last time I threw up was the day after he got elected.
The time I puked before that was in the year 2000, but that was unrelated to any election.
I ate too much that night after finding out the results. Something like six major states betrayed us. It was the kind of dick move you'd expect to see on Game of Thrones. Years from now, they'll probably call it "The Red Election.
I just shoved food in my gob without thinking. I didn't give a shit. Nothing mattered. I went and got a sausage pizza from Little Caesar's, because it was close to closing time and they were out of pepperoni and three meat. They didn't have any Pepsi left, either, so I settled on a 2-liter of Mountain Dew. Before you even ask, yes, I ate the whole damn thing all by myself.
I tried to binge something funny on Netflix, something to make me feel good about life even for a little while again.
The pain came hours later, as I was trying to sleep. It kept growing and it kept me up all night. I drove to the convenience store when it finally opened, and got some Pepto Bismol. I ended up using all of it, over time and as directed, and still felt horrible. I was still up around noon, fighting this pain.
Eventually I just had to make myself puke, so that's what I did.
It was the usual brown and everything you'd expect from a good upchucking, but it was also colored with the Pepto. In amongst the horrible reddish-brown slurry were chunks of the sausage pieces from the pizza, and some, well, if I'm being honest, most, of them looked like they weren't even chewed. I'm lucky that none of that tried to take the path through my nostrils. There were also some wet dough blobs floating around in the mix. I had produced a visually interesting goulash in my bathroom sink.
It occured to me that I got a good look at myself and how red my face was before and during the proceedings. You never see someone go red when they fake it on TV and in movies. You never see it coming out of their nose.
After all that, though, I did feel better. The ordeal taught me an important lesson. You can't give up on hope. You can't give up on yourself. Things might look bad now, but you can get through it.
I mean, you have to. Fuck.
Ghost stars for your story, not so much for this lame clip.
I often forget how young this crowd skews. You may be laboring under the belief that US presidents are like the last guy who held the office. A big deal was made about how he was black, but frankly, what was shocking to me was that we'd elect an openly competent and intelligent leader. There are a number of theories as to why this is, and they're worth discussing, but the fact is indisputable.
Imagine Donald Trump getting elected with most democrats voting for him, and you've got Ronald Reagan basically. Hey, did you know Ronald Wilson Reagan is an anagram for Insane Anglo Warlord? Anna Madrigal, eat your heart out!
John Holmes Motherfucker
You can see a lot of the trends that created Trump in the Reagon-Bush Era, but Reagan was a competent politician. Even cerified non-geniuses like GW Bush were fairy competent about politics. Trump isn't a politiian; he's a troll. And the main reason why he's president is because when you're one of the forgotten white supremacists who have been marginalized by the constant drumbeat of non-evil, once you've had a black president,the America you believed in is gone forever, and you really don't have anything left other than revenge. They wanted to MAKE THE LIBRUL'S HEADS EXPLODE.
This is creating a weird dynamic that a professional politician would avoid at all cost.. He's the most unpopular president in modern history, and he's got nowhere to go. If he takes a shit in front of Conress during the state of the Union Address, his followers will respond with delight. " LOL THAT'S GOING TO DRIVE THE LIBERALS CRAZY!" The only thing they won't accept from Trump is any gestureof reconciliation toward the 60 per cent who disapprove of him, and I don't think that would get him very far. We've all made up our minds about this guy.
If you think my video is lame... well, I guess that's valid. You're not provably wrong. I'm glad I made it, and I wish it was better, which is how I always feel about these at first. I'll probably have a more fully-formed opinion. I make videos to submit here, and after 6-12 hours of editing and rendering, The result has been too obviously terrible to submit maybe once or twice.
You're capable of so much more, John. Your first commercial for this site set a high bar. I like the subject matter, but the idea is a little ...half baked (rim shot).
John Holmes Motherfucker
I think this video justifies the time I spent working on it, and it justifies the time someone spends watching it. I also agree that it's kind of lame and half baked.
the POETV Superbowl ad was definitely more inspired than this, but inspiration can't be forced or manufactured. You do the work, and it either happens or it doesn't. Either way, there's nothing to do but make another one.
|Oscar Wildcat - 2018-01-23 |
True, that. But while you can't _force_ the creative process, .
Picture this. Two drunks in the pub bathroom Ray and Venkman, draining the swamp. One's been drinking video feed of Donald Trump on the campaign trail. The other's deep in his double D cups watching Stormy Daniels pornography. Now, in defiance of Egon's directive, THEY CROSS THE STREAMS.
What golden showers may emerge, only you can say John.
John Holmes Motherfucker
No, you can't force inspiration. You can force the creative process, in fact, you must. If you're not willing to make a video when you're not inspired, you won't be ready when inspiration comes.
John Holmes Motherfucker
What you have here is the premise for a decent sketch for Robot Chicken, and there's nothing wrong with that, but that's not what this is. it's an experiment, and experiments usually seem lame and half baked. It's not satire, it isn't making a point. It's an iconic historical event, put in an absurd context. There's no assigned meaning. The meaning is what is discovered.
Well at least we can agree to agree.
I'm not suggesting you literally implement this odd notion of mine, just consider it. More practical implementation advice would be to look into recent activities on reddit(?) creating virtual porn using celebrity images. THEN CROSS THE FUCKIN' STREAMS, MAN!
...a reenactment of their sex activities, in the style of the Zapruder film, perhaps.
|John Holmes Motherfucker - 2018-01-26 |
Seriously, that's a really good idea!
Look, you're the viewer. You're having original thoughts and original ideas. That's way more important than whether you "like" my video. I don't know whether I like it myself. I really love watching some of these 6 or 7 months down the road.
I've been trying to explain my process, but nothing would be lamer than for me to try to talk you out of your reaction.
| Register or login To Post a Comment|