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Jehovah's Witness Cartoon
Desc:Jesus lives in space and is going to wreck us all to bits with asteroids.
Category:Religious, Cartoons & Animation
Tags:God, Jesus, Watchtower, conducting the apocalypse Fantasia-style
Submitted:TypicalEllisProtagonist
Date:08/17/07
Views:7813
Rating:
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Favorited 4 Times

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takewithfood
This has to be the same animation studio that did the Mighty Hercules. I can totally picture Jesus rescuing Helena from a hydra and carrying Daedalus off by the scruff of his neck. OLYMPIAAAA!
Princess v2.1
I love how JEBUS comes back to destroy those who don't follow ______
Michael Houser
Jesus -- the anti-Superman. We need a benevolent Lex Luthor to stop him!!!
Actually, I have this video on VHS, and though it's hard to tell here, it's actually about how much Jehovah's Witnesses suck ass. The animation is meant to be a parody, and the whole thing was made by Christians, that other bullshit sect. Which is not to say that it's not fucking hilarious.
I can't remember which side the old dude they interview at the race-tracks is on, but the fact that he can only be caught for Q&A AT THE HORSE RACES is awesome.
Aelric
christen or witness, the masturbatory destruction cartoon towards the end is exactly why religion is poison. fuckers preach love but can't wait to see that shit happen. goddamn it, now i made myself pissed instead of entertained!

FeilecanOiche
It's a parody, but the art style is spot-on. It's like watching the Watchtower. The scene at the very end with the Witness heads in Heaven is a direct rip from one of their books.


NeitherHerenorThere
The best part is the GREAT SHINY GRIN on his face after destroying billions of people.
Meerkat
This gives me just the greatest bestest idea. "LEFT BEHIND: a dystopian vision of our animated future by Ralph Bakshi"
Cap'n Profan!ty
so if there are more than 144,000 jehovah's witnesses, some are gonna get the shaft, huh
dead_cat
Well yeah, but it isn't god's fault they're total posers.

crote
These dudes, Christian Scientists, Mormons, an assload of crazy Utopians... I get the impression that nineteenth century America was basically a parade of non-stop wacky religious fun. Sign me up.
kingarthur
I once had to teach a sex-ed class to a room full of 5th grade children which included two Jehovah's Witness kids. Needless to say, the next day I was lucky the FBI didn't cart me off for all the insane shit their mother and grandmother accused me of.
Urburos
That's why they require permission slips now.

--Also: TAKE THAT, everyone who ever lived! (Children should be forced to watch this repeatedly. It must be good if it's about the invisible mangel.)

Rev. Blackson Pollock
A JW I knew used to tell me that there were two kinds of Witnesses, the dedicated and the medicated. I'm not saying it's the right choice to make but some of the J-dubs I knew are pretty cool people, and like any belief system you'll get hardline fundies that screw it up for the more mentally balanced among them.

Meatsack Jones
-00:18 Jebus kills little kids at church and then face plants their corpse in mommy's crotch. What a kidder!
fluffy
So where does Anakin Skywalker come into the picture?
ihounokyaku
Jesus is kind of a dick.
Caminante Nocturno
The people at -0:34 are creepy.
Rodents of Unusual Size
I HAVE TO GO BACK TO MY PLANET NOW BLOOP BLOOP BLOOP BLOOP
Jeriko-1
That looked like he was doing a Kefka at the end.
sloth love crunk
Jesus looks like Charles Bronson.
Rev. Blackson Pollock
That's because Jesus IS Charles Bronson

Lothar
The VW falling in the water after the bridge crumbles apart is my favorite part. Anyone who drives a bug deserves to die.
LetsFistAgain
Before going to heaven Jesus rescurrected in several bodies all of wich bore an uncanny resemblance to Paul Kersey.

Also, a hundred years of worldwide Ostracism just to prove that Jesus died on a regular stick? Great Job JW, really.
oogaBooga
A SUPER angel.
vagina_warrior
This is absurd. J-dubs aren't allowed to watch TV.
La Loco
I've been in houses where PG movies were contraband.
pathetique
that cut from dead child to buddy christ is just master creeps.
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