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Desc:Fake NASCAR survey calls a NASCAR fan. Don't thank me, thank WeFunk on PoESports for finding this.
Category:Sports, Humor
Tags:Racist, NASCAR, nascar survey, ballsucker, soul glo
Submitted:Ahriman the Creepy Lurker
Date:10/02/07
Views:5751
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Comment count is 40
Smellvin
Mr. Burgess: the angriest man alive. There are about five other calls these guys have made to Mr. Burgess which ought to be rather easily found on YouTube.
toothsome
"It's NASCAR, not NASCOON."

I like how the Soul Glo jingle drives him beyond all reason.
zatojones
I like how befuddled he is at how unaware of this fact the people on the other end of the phone are. The exasperated incredulity pours out of the guy.

Blaise
Immediately after hearing the jingle and leading into his rant ...

"See, This is, This is, This is the kinda shit I'm talking about".
Every time you try to have a good time ..."

I agree, the jingle is was what made him snap.

beautiful

bang to buck ratio
Beep beep beeeeepin' NAS-beep beeeep Kunta Kinte beep beep Jheri-Curl beep beep beeep five beepin' stars.
William Burns
Mother******* ***damn porch monkey **** mother******* damn ****suckin' sonuva ******* *****, don't you ******* ***damn call me again, you mother*******, ****suckin', ***damn ****** lovin' sonuva ****** bitch democrat mother****** ballsucker sonuva ******* ***damn biiiiiiiachhhhhh!
anvill
The comment above is actually in this video. Here I was thinking it was hyperbole.

Time Travel Mishap
oh god it is. it actually is. and it is beautiful.

C. Eloi Marx
Mr. Burgess sounds angry enough to accomplish superhuman feats of strength or give himself psionic powers. He's at least angry enough to shoot blood from his eyes.
manfred
If you are a NASCAR fan, press one. If you're no*BEEP*
j lzrd / swift idiot
I just about died laughing at that moment, and only your comment prevented total catastrophic lung damage.

AND IT'S ONLY BEEN 16 SECONDS!!

I'm gonna have to save this for later.

Pandatronic
Clap. Clap. Clap.
enki don't
Oh, I had forgotten all about this gem! Thanks POE-TV!
Roachbud
Someone should blow up the Daytona 500.
theSnake
Holy shit. Halfway through I was like hmm this is only four stars because its censored, then I realized its funnier because of it.
DMKA
This is so old (I first heard it back in like 2003), but still hilarious.

"Who's they?"

"NI**ERS!"
OldScratch
I speak on behalf of democrat ballsuckers everywhere: 5 stars. Vive la Formule 1!
Repomancer
You gotta admit, the guy has a certain eloquence.
coprolalia
Including black people = political correctness.

Plus, tigers? In Africa?
Bort
I ask you, sir: where can you find tigers? Only in Kenya.

ONLY in Kenya.

RomancingTrain
Kunta Kinte was F***** slave
oswaldtheluckyrabbit
Holy shit I remember this from high school
kingarthur
"Where are you from?"

"Greenville, Mississippi."


Hooper_X
Man, that guy really doesn't like Soul Glo.

(this is ancient, but still a classic.)
bang to buck ratio
When he started in with "every time you try and have a good time..." I honestly thought for a second he was going to do the Chris Rock routine.
RomancingTrain
6:05 Soul Glo jingle is awesome
glenn
It's from Coming to America, and it's a very nice touch.

"You don't think he'll recognize the jingle?

"Uh, no, probably not."

Testicles of Doom
"See, this is the kinda shit I'm talkin' 'bout."

Can you imagine being married to this guy? "What the fuck you yellin' at the phone fer?"
Camonk
Oh man.
Caminante Nocturno
The outburst at the end had me, for one brief moment, suspecting that it was fake.
Gwago
Wow. PURE gold.

-Sir, we are actually in talks right now to let Snoop Dog open up the Daytona 500 this year!
-Do you know how many fuckin' Nascar fans are registered with the NRA?
Pie Boy
what do they ride in the kenya 600

if it's not tigers than what
Cleaner82
Can't white people have one thing, just ONE thing? :-(
Jen igma
black people can drive as fast as they want, why do they need us?
gambol
oh man
Mayberry Pancakes
I'm going to imagine the event in Atlanta is actually called "Black Festival".
zerobackup
So, am I the only one that thinks NASCAR fan is an actor? Really? I've met plenty of racists, they are rarely this articulate, and they never reference this many pop culture icons. Also they have poor comedic timing in real life, and this is clearly a radio show which they would never let a guy that swears that much on a stupid radio skit. Fucking fake.
Bort
1) It's likely that the survey guys called dozens of homes before they got this response.

2) The part that seems realistic to me is that Mr. Burgess isn't all "BALLSUCKERS!!!" right out of the gate. Like most people with an overdeveloped hate center, he knows to keep it polite for a while, and it's only after they push his buttons long enough that he loses it.

3) The interviewers do a good job (until the end, anyway) of fitting the stereotype of Yankee do-gooders: well-intentioned (according to their messed-up Yankee standards) but wholly unwanted. It's important that all irritation is accidental rather than intentional, otherwise Mr. Burgess wouldn't feed into it.

Squeamish
And, as a person who lives in Texas, let me tell you - there are people out there like this.

The Mothership
Oldie but a goodie.
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