So this is all it takes to become an internet celebrity and make real-life money off of it? I really need to make one of these things someday.
5 stars to keep your video average up; you're performed a valuable service.
|Mike Tyson?! |
I enjoy these so much more because my gf leaves the room when I watch them.
Oh, cursing. Now I get it.
I understand the concept behind five-starring this, but my conscience just won't allow me.
|Dr. Lobotomy |
The only good I saw in these things was him managing to land in Top Gun with the Power Glove. Sure, it was probably faked but his speechless reaction was spot on.
I am a simple man with simple pleasures, and why you heartless bastards hate this guy I will never understand.
I don't hate him, it's just nothing special. A dude angry at old games? For a few years, that was half the internet. Seanbaby is clever, at least.
Also, it's boring. Fucking shit-ass-cock suck-your-balls-off-and-spit-'em-up-your-ass boring.
Because he isn't funny or entertaining. Sorry.
Well you should be sorry. But I accept your apology on behalf of all closet AVGN fans worldwide.
What the fuck? What the fuck Nintendo? What the Fuck? What the fuckin fuck? What the fuckin fuckin fuck is goin on? Fuck! I don't fuckin understand! I don't understand! Fuck!
Five starred because this video needs to be on here, as an example.
+1 because I can totally sympathize as someone who sucks at Top Gun
But still: FUCKING FUCKERS FUCK FUCKING FUCKED UP FUCKS is only amusing for a little bit
|William Burns |
Wow, it's Seanbaby except ten years too late to be relevant, unfunny and perma-virginal.
Three stars not to be a dick to Herr Matthias.
What? I think he's funny.
|Dummy Rum |
Should have been the Power Glove video. I agree that at least one of his vids should be up here, just 'cuz.
When I was a kid, I went nuts trying to figure out wtf it was supposed to do... a controller that strapped to your wrist or something? Seeing him tear it a new one pleased the cynic in me.
I like him. Not enough to put him on POETV, but he's better than "Attack of the Show".
|Goofy Gorilla |
I liked it!
Was Top Gun's control backwards, with pressing up to climb, or is AVGN just an even bigger idiot than I thought?
+1 because the first three seconds of his intro song is actually pretty good, and +1 for Herr Matthias.
I've never why or how this guy got so popular, though. His swearing lacks the the oomph of Cautionary Tale of Swords or those Pokemon kids from Jersey, and the writing seems like it's trying for HST / Kerouc kind of poetry, but just sputters and fails half way down the driveway. He's just really mediocre. What gives?
He's riding the coattails of nostalgia, basically. Also, he really, really sucks at video games, and that makes people feel good about themselves, I guess.
The parts where he actually points out the stupid "wtf were they thinking" parts of game can be amusing, but it's also only about 20% of the videos and the rest is forced trying to hard fake rage that needs to be cut and OMG HE'S DRINKING BEER THAT'S SOOOOO COOL I DRANK A BEER AT A PARTY ONCE.
I never got why people thought landing was so touch in Top Gun. The instructions are RIGHT THERE and all you just follow them. I had to try and intentionally fuck up just because I wanted to see what the crash screen looked like.
The beer part is right on. Wasn't he drinking a single rolling rock through one of his reviews? HARDCORE DUDE.
This guy isn't funny at all, and is actually quick unlikable. Yahtzee does game reviews using lots of swearing but achieves completely different results, I'm guessing the secret ingredient is talent and a sense of humor.
|Sudan no1 |
This guy isn't very funny.
I have fond memories of Top Gun. My 6 year old brother could land the plane (most of the time).
Mega Man 2 came out in July of 1989 in the United States of America. I was 7 years old. By June of 1989, I had said things that were probably so bad, that the Angry Nintendo Nerd would blush and cry if he heard them. He says TEH WORDS U CANNUT HAR ON TV... ummmm, yeah, who cares, all these games sucked ass, we all played them, you are not funny, cool, or edgy at all by saying a bad word talking about them, sorry.
If Hornytoad had a television show about science, it would be exactly like this.
Also, what's up with his voice? Does he have an "accent" or is he just hydrocephalic?
TOP GUN THE SECOND MISSION! THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE THIS SHOULD BE MISSION FIVE AM I RIGHT!
All i know is the nerd is refreshing as all hell. Real humor for me is always derived at the expense of something extremely dumb. Not screaming Chuck Norris name while dressed as a dancing banana shaking maracas and repeatedly shitting yourself.
Yes, homosexual skaters in shoppingcarts are hilarious.
this is a self-referencing post
|Billy Buttsex |
This nerd sucks
he curses about Nintendo. delightful
haha remember that one video game.
|Frank Rizzo |
I like these videos, sorry. The whole "I DRINK BEER!" thing is a little dumb though.
"...he goes away like 'fuck him!'"
A good video game review, objectively, should be something written (and, in cases of video reviews, performed), by someone who takes on certain characteristics of "your friend". That is, this game is going to be played, explored, and then pontificated upon by someone who is somewhat like-minded of you, but different enough that he can deliver a nuanced perspective.
What I see here is apparently one in a series of video game reviews written and performed by your really dumb friend. The one you never hang out with, except when he says he'll cover you at the bar cause he just got paid, so it seems worth it at first when you order your first Newcastle on his tab, but then the whole experience sours as he gets progressively more drunk and keeps talking about how he wants to put it in Kirstin Dunst's ass.
And really, listening to him try to piece together a paragraph just makes me want to reach for my red pen.
Also, big negative stars to the whole idea of pens in the shirt pocket affectation. Get it? Cause he's a self-proclaimed nerd, you see.
Anyway, I guess I had to be exposed to this dross sooner or later, and now I know.
king of kings.
dont knock newcastle though, goes down smooth LIKE YOUR MOM!!!!!!!!!!!
I was never aware there was a Video Game Review Style Guide. I am intrigued, and wish to know more.
I hate AVGN, and this isn't even really a good example of his usual stuff, it's way more polished.
I'll give him this, though: Yeah, the refueling thing was bullshit. I owned Top Gun, as did a few of my friends in elementary school. NO ONE made it past the refueling ever. I don't know anyone who made it to level 3. This isn't to say it's impossible, but it's so fucking hard that pretty much anyone with brains just decided it wasn't worth the effort after your millionth try.
The secret to beating this game?
Just hold "down" on the controller the entire time. You'll be climbing throughout the entire mission and as long as your nose is up no enemy can hit you.
Yes I know they're sposedta be clouds.
|Monchiles Monchiles |
I thought that his very first review over Simon's Quest was really good. So yeah, for nostalgia.
I want negative stars.
|Jeff Fries |
Cursing I don't mind, ADR cursing is ridiculous
Also, if this was a Ulillillia video (and it nearly is) you'd be eating it up.
An average score for an average internet user.
|Terry Taint |
HAY GUYS HE'S LIKE SEANBABY LOL. EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT MORE THAN A DOZEN PEOPLE PEOPLE ACTUALLY HEARD OF HIM.
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