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Desc:Army contractor develops robot exoskeleton. Finally.
Category:Science & Technology
Tags:suit, man, iron, iron man, exoskeleton
Submitted:jangbones
Date:11/21/07
Views:90096
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Comment count is 94
Albuquerque Halsey
Hory clap!

Shame they had to make an example of Pvt. Pyle at the start of the clip.
Albuquerque Halsey
Yes, look at Steve Emro's forehead. his big bald sweaty forehead. LOOK

RockBolt
Yes, you can pick up ammo boxes, very nice. Now where is the 5 on 1 melee combat?
revdrew
YAY FUTURE!
junkyardarmor
Does it handel like Armored Core? 'Cause i'm pretty good at that game, I could have a career in this...
Stog
FUCK YES.

I can't wait to see a combat-ready version of this suit.
Xenocide
REGISTER. IT'S THE LAW.
baleen

We already have space marines and you don't.
Sorry guys, but America wins.
j lzrd / swift idiot

"I'm ready, man, check it out. I am the ultimate badass! State of the badass art! You do NOT wanna fuck with me. Check it out! Hey Ripley, don't worry. Me and my squad of ultimate badasses will protect you! Check it out! Independently targeting particle beam phalanx. Vwap! Fry half a city with this puppy. We got tactical smart missiles, phase-plasma pulse rifles, RPGs, we got sonic electronic ball breakers! We got nukes, we got knives, sharp sticks..."

sosage
The future of boxing is gonna be awesome!
Doomstein
Boxing? Try genetically engineered dinosaur wrestling!

Hugo Gorilla
Get away from my ammo boxes, you bitch!
Aubrey McFate
LOOK AT STEVE EMRO'S FOREHEAD
sheikurbouti
Future generations will laugh at our hubris.
Adramelech
You mean like our future mutated cave children after the Robot War, right?

sheikurbouti
If said children survived this hypothetical Robot War... then yes.

TinManic
omg! lets be meek and feeble in case the future laughs as we laugh at old videos of people inventing the stuff we use today!

this is awesome.

afp3683
it really makes you think.

APE_GOD
Yes. Just like we laugh at the hubris of the metallurgists of the iron age.

What pride to think they could make something stronger than copper.

What pride.

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
assuming they survived the robot war, our children would laugh at our weakness.

Maggot Brain
Oh shit. It can go up stair!
Billy Buttsex
THANK YOU SCIENCE.

It's a good day to be a man. I am happy.
futurebot
"it's a good day to be a man"

Will you please shut up now

Billy Buttsex
Oh, like girls go around talking about robotic exoskeletons

TrafficCone
Yeah, we do. In fact, I make my living writing about robots, idiot.

Since I can't have robotic limbs of my own (yet), I'm buying one of these, instead.

It's a great day to be a woman!

j lzrd / swift idiot
MORE INDIGNANT CHICKS WITH ROBOT ARMS PLZ

Monchiles Monchiles
I'm thinking about getting surgery to replace my legs with robotic ones. It's risky but I think the benefits are worth it.

kennydra
I'm gonna just interpret this as its a good day to be a man, as in, homo sapiens. cos yeah, you're right.

zatojones
Space. Fucking. Marines. Awesome.
Gill_Sans
I am excited to see what this technology lends to space marine fucking process.

Shion
Mobile Fucking Infantry.

I'm going to go buy stock in Sarkos now...

TSR
Infinitely better than Horse. Fucking. Calvary.

Camonk
Yes, awesome. Finally. It is about time science got its shit together. I've been hearing a lot about science and global warming, science and medicine, science and outer space. It's about time science got the fuck back to making awesome machines. Flying cars now and robot butlers. Now, please.
Nikon
I want my beautiful robotic maid/consort.

Keefu
Somewhere up above, Heinlein smiles.
takewithfood
I wonder if it can be programmed to do Thriller.
Cap'n Profan!ty
Signing bonus: ,000
Operator salary: ,000
Exoskeleton: ,000,000

are combat equivalent to:

IED: (or fair market value)

Therefore, I do not think we win, unless we stop fighting stupidly.
Adramelech
It's true that a lot of this is R&D fluff until they make an exoskeleton that is immune to Shot In The Head, but it's fun to look at.

And goddamn can that thing move boxes.

Hooker
If only we could slash that signing bonus and operator salary.

baleen

maybe you could put IED SENSORS ON IT. and stuff!

keinsignal
Wonder how these things fare against Really Big Magnets...

Rape Van Winkle
yes prostitute, let's make it so it smells gunpowder.

mouser
I want a fucking ASS-KICKING S. W. Hawking symbiotic OVERLORD!!!!!!!
NineEleven
Why'd they tether him? Would the suit try to run away with the guy trapped inside?

Also there's a new Army career...exosuit technician.
Blank_Slate
Unfortunately, they're not "tethers", they're power cords. The exoskeleton needs a ton power in order to operate.

I'm really disappointed with the science of exoskeletons since no one ever seems bother with coming up with a decent mobile battery system to power these things.

I mean, if you were going to make power armor, shouldn't you focus on the power aspect first and then build your exoskeleton around that power system?

Anyways, FIVES STARS FOR HOT SEXY EXOSKELETON ACTION!!!!

Green
Tethered exoskeletons...Will Japan be the first to fill these things with embryonic fluid or can we beat them at their own game?!?!

FABIO2
I'm disappointed with the progress of battery power in general. If you take a look at all the technological leaps in the past 50 or so years, the advancement of batteries is pretty pathetic.

Rape Van Winkle
Duracell runs the free world!

fluffy
"And eventually they will even be autonomous." Oh shit.
fluffy
Oh, also, +5 for "prancing and dancing"

Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Can you masturbate with this thing on?
EvilHomer
Like you've never masturbated before!

fap fap fap fap OH GOD TOO STRONG

Adramelech
God I hope the first civilian batch has defects and we get reports of construction workers flinging bags of cement 30 feet in the air or elderly women pulling the rails off of staircases.

j lzrd / swift idiot
Portal of Evil News is going to be fucking hilarious for our great-grandchildren, but they'll all be taking it too much for granted to laugh as hard as we would.

The future of the "Slipping on a Banana Peel" gag is bright though. There's that to hope for.

boner
It goes up stairs and ramps, and keeps you from falling down in the shower. Ed McMahon will be selling these on TV soon.
afp3683
You can go anywhere in it. Even the Grand Canyon.

sannyasin
I poo-pooed the DARPA funded research into this but now seeing it in action I think that the powered armor in Fallout might actually become a reality someday. If not that then perhaps I won't ever have to worry about being wheelchair bound or physically limited in my old age.
RandomFerret
Maybe it's just the power of suggestion from the title of this video, but the announcer really sounds like Stan Lee.

Welcome, true believers!
fourthguy
Mommy, I want one.
theFlu
the only thing to stand a chance against the KILLDOZER
baleen

i hate you

theFlu
gaycumballs

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
its like tourette syndrome except for having a neurological disorder you're just a fucking moron.

Caminante Nocturno
One step closer to making Galaxy Fraulein Yuna a reality. Or at least Sky Girls.
dead_cat
Oh man, when these things hit the civilian market, there's gonna be so many self-described "superheroes" out there attempting to dish out vigilante justice and failing miserably.

The future is going to be hilarious.
Scynne
I have a strong desire to own one of those.
Jeff Fries
Fake
Frostilicus
this exoskeleton is interested in taking care of its body and playing sports
Udderdude
Sarcos = Cyberdyne?
j lzrd / swift idiot
...Steve Emero listened while the Terminator laid it all down: Skynet, Judgment Day, the history of things to come. It's not everyday you hear that you're responsible for 3 billion deaths. He took it pretty well.

Cheese
Why can't he run 60 mph?
ashtar.
Speed limit's 55.
hur hur hur

ihounokyaku
When he said "taking on a ramp" I thought he said "Taking on Iran". Go figure.
gambol
This is how it all begins. All of it.
kingarthur
Well, we coulda used the money to fix healthcare and education, but fuggit, let's see some robot killah machines!
Cube
Paving way for the greatest evil known to man... EXOSKELETOR! Next we need to find Super He-Man.
theSnake
EVENTUALLY, EXOSKELETONS COULD EVEN BECOME AUTONOMOUS

Xiphias
:D
j lzrd / swift idiot
D:

STOP DAMMIT!! YOU'RE A COLLABORATOR!

Pie Boy
AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!!
Spastic Avenger
dun dun dun dun-dun
dun dun dun dun-dun
MRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW

na na na, naaa naaa naaaa

jsut needs piles of human skulls to step on.
mysterycar
WALK ON HEELS?
Ponasty
Prancing and Dancing??

Vicious
For the love of God please do not make an autonomous killbot. PLEASE.
FABIO2
I had a friend in the national guard whose unit got to play around with a couple of close combat Redman training suits. They spent most of the time goofing around where everyone would smash batons and other objects onto them which they would shrug off as they walked around spouting lines from Robocop. It almost made me want to enlist.
dementomstie
So is it showing things that humans can't do in the demos? Because I can walk up stairs and ramps. OH GOD, I'M NOT HUMAN!
bizzaro
can you jump super fucking high? because if you cant jump suiper fucking high, that thing is worthless
oogaBooga
Strap some moon shoes on it and youre good to go

j lzrd / swift idiot
HeeeeeEEEEEYYYYY~!! Not regular moon-shoes though, super-hydraulic moonshoes, with heavy-ass gyroscopics for midair stability!

It's the missing link between simple strap on exoskeletons that walk like the P-5000 Powerloader in Aliens, and full-blown, fully contained, jump-jet boosted supersuits like those swarming, battlemech-killing Elemental soldiers on the Clan side in Battletech.

ebola
Oh hell yes. I would join the army if I got one of these.
Shotgun Jackson
Finally a PRANCING MACHINE!!!
Prickly Pete
Gangsta
swampy
When do they add the "Administer Morphine" button?
j lzrd / swift idiot
"Welcome to the H.E.V. MK4 Hazardous Environment suit, for use in hazardous environment conditions."

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