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Desc:This f*cking thing almost ruined my movie tonight. IT WILL PAY.
Category:Advertisements, Military
Tags:three doors down, national guard, history what is that
Submitted:Merzbau
Date:12/07/07
Views:11098
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Resubmit:RockBolt

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Comment count is 42
Merzbau
Gotta love the repeated Revolutionary War imagery, never mind that the National Guard per se didn't exist until the early 20th century. What really pushes this into the realm of fantasy, though, is the inclusion of a vaguely Katrina-like disaster scenario complete with large numbers of National Guardsmen (presumably deployed in a timely fashion).

And yeah, I wasn't kidding about this whole goddamn thing being jammed in front of the trailers before The Darjeeling Ltd.
eatenmyeyes
Way to charge a cannon, retard.
13.5
It's a man's life in the National Guard, photogenically escaping death and never killing anyone onscreen.

I saw it before No Country for Old Men, which I think made it more piquant, like diarrhea sprayed all over the floor of a public bathroom
Caminante Nocturno
Did they really play this shit before your movie started? Because if they did, I think I've found the excuse I need to never set foot in a movie theater for the rest of my life.
Menudo con queso
Great post Merz, this damn near ruined my movie night too. If I weren't such a dork for Phillip Pullman I would've stayed bitter all night.

Yes, they played this PLUS twenty minutes of other ads PLUS 15 more minutes of previews for REALLY BAD MOVIES before I ever got to see an opening credit. The question is why they aren't paying me to go instead of the other way around.

Go Guard, save T-shirt guy from the Emo House!

fluffy
This is why I just wait for a movie to come out on DVD, and rent it via Netflix. The MPAA must really hate me since they make no money off of me and they can't even do anything about it.

Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Yup that's pretty much why I don't go to movies anymore. Fuck 'em.

ZawBanjito
Fucking RAWK! 5 stars for the black dude in the Revolutionary War, but not apparently in any of the others since.
helicopter cats
Someone should insert the Time Chasers guy into the Revolutionary War re-enactors shots.
hornung
I had to go watch this
http://youtube.com/watch?v=X90T5sY5c2o
to stop from being sick to my stomach.


fuck three doors down.
pieces of shit.

fuck using imagery of guerilla tactics against an occupying force .
sannyasin
I feel conflicted. I want to vote this 1-star but I feel I most vote it higher so others see this awful propaganda video by an equally awful band so they know this bullshit.
yeahjim
I know so many kids who are joining up. Where's the counter-propaganda, people? This is fucked.
coprolalia
Need more recruitment ads for the Information War.

Billy Buttsex
Who needs counter-propaganda? If you enlist because of a Three Doors Down music video, hey-- who's gonna stop you anyway?

yeahjim
It's all well and good to be among the smart 10% who are resistant to media conditioning, but that doesn't change the fact that a lot of good kids are going to be affected by this ad. Fuck it, I'm submitting something to the hopper.

yeahjim
Okay! Well, I found it, but apparently it's already been submitted (and rejected I assume. Not evil enough?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TUmCJciwI8

Saw it during a guerrilla theater showing of They Live.

Menudo con queso
Yep, "Sir! No Sir!", now playing at your local art house theater to huge audiences of twelve already-converted hippies for an exclusive two-night run! Better than nothing, I guess...

petep
GENERAL BETRAY-US

Big Muddy
"Sir! No Sir" is on my friends netflick's list right now. We caught part of it on IFC but missed a good portion. Still the best doc I've seen in years. Good call Menudo.

Lurchi
Why doesn't the band enlist?
zatojones
They suck so bad the army doesn't want them

Meatsack Jones
Would you like to know more?
Albuquerque Halsey
five for evil.
coprolalia
Where are they playing this shit, Regal theaters? I'd walk out.
The kids need to see Metallica's "One" video instead of this.
Doctor Arcane
How about Rooster?

Squeamish
Also Rave Motion Pictures. Went to see AVPR and they showed this horrible, soul-sucking thing.

Who falls for this kind of stuff, anyway?

glasseye
How does blowing the shit out of people in the middle east make us any more free?

God damn war mongers.
Rodents of Unusual Size
My, they're getting desperate aren't they?

What are the recruitment rates right now? To google!
dueserpenti
We rolled up into their country and blew their shit apart with no provocation, and now we're the imperialists occupying them, so shouldn't we be the Redcoats in this analogy? Except Iraq was never one of our colonies. Hmm...maybe they can be the French and we can be the Wehrmacht? No? Too much?
Camonk
Hey kids please join the National Guard and get fucked by your government hard and in the ass. You kids still like that Three Doors Down, right? Man I hope so or this will end up embarrassingly transparent...
Roachbud
More proof that 3 Doors Down represents everything that is wrong with rock'n'roll, first there was that support the troops song now they're openly recruiting cannon fodder. They should start playing country.
wtf japan
Don't worry guys. As a member of this ad's target audience, I can tell you that all my friends joined the military because they played too many video games. No one is going to be tricked into joining by 3 Doors Down. Geez.

If they showed a video of a soldier giggling while he tore up an Iraqi villiage with a minigun, however...
Pillager
It funny how the National Guard commercials emphasize Stateside service yet fail to mention that you'll be shipped off to Fallujah as soon as your training is done...

Five stars don't convey the amount of evil trapped in that vid.
Hooper_X
This past weekend I saw a short form of this ad with Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Three Doors Down pimping CITIZEN/SOLDIER downloads on th'internet or some shit.

Jesus christ.
phalsebob
Since when the fuck have emo cunts ever signed on to the army? Is this backasswards or is my understanding of the universe?
almost-a-pacifist
No one should let poignant lovely images and music decide their future, but its a good ad and as long as the military is trying to sell you something, they aren't drafting you. Besides that, I think there are some heroes in the National Guard and I hope we always have citizen soldiers because the alternative is no soldiers or what?, mercenaries?
Caminante Nocturno
COUNTERPOINT: You smell bad.

Cathy Garger
My family and I went to the movies on Thanksgiving to see a funny Christmas movie...and this war advertisement totally wrecked our good day. What a horrid thing to show families - not just on Thanksgiving, not just before a comedy, but just period. The National Guard is the new way that the military is getting recruits to be its cannon fodder that it can't get any other way. And this Propaganda ad - that glorifies war by using a popular group and using a popular band... is vile and disgusting. This glorifies war - the killing of innocents who have done not a thing wrong to any of us... And the radioactivity of our weapons has contaminated Afghanistan and Iraq - and the citizens' genes - for all eternity. This is beyond pitifully sad and I am writing a national article about it. This is the Mind F*&%$ of America, alright. And the saddest thing of all? The kids who sign up in the recruitment offices are not told the whole truth. I know this because I have spoken to many veterans from the first Gulf War to those who have served recently.
Caminante Nocturno
Who the fuck are you?

Big Muddy
Wow. Google Cathy Garger.

It's like POEred just bled into POETV for a sad last gasp.
Awesome.

Man Who Fights Like Woman
Five for "I will NEVER leave" and cheap 9/11 exploitation.
jui
Love 3 doors down but the reality if you are thinking of joining the guard don't do it, atleast the florida guard as all that would happen is they will deploy you, get hit by a damn IED and then they will just let you and your family suffer when you get back to the USA. Sounds far fetched well it is happening to me they will let you fend for your self and let you loose every thing you have along with your health. Bottom line don't do it you will regret it your whole life just like me brain injury and all the things that came with it, and when you think some one gives a shit think again. Lots of soldiers I know that have been hit with IED's and we where all just pushed to the side no need for us any more. Fight for your country and state and you will be left to the side after you've done your part. Lets see what 3 Doors down would do for them in the time of need.Thanks for listening to me.
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